1, small gestures can always be so casual, and a casual action can also be warm for a long time, so that it will not ripple for a long time, with a slight wave. For example, deliberately pouring wine and sending paper towels to each other, taking the initiative to help each other drink, quietly giving gifts, and even sneaking around, there is a feeling of protection and protection behind ambiguity. Whether the two sides cooperate with ambiguity or unilaterally implement ambiguity, there are always small moves at work. 2, brother and sister Many men and women will regard being a brother and sister as a prelude to being a lover. It's just emotional ambiguity They don't refuse or promise. They enjoy this specious ambiguity. This is a cover for two people to be ambiguous. They won't be lovers, and they don't want to be just friends, so this embarrassing relationship has emerged. 3, confidant whether it is a confidante or a confidante, a little closer than a good friend, but a little farther than a lover. Two people promised nothing. But even so, you are willing to pay more than a committed couple. There is no responsibility, but you are eager to take it and ask for nothing in return. The two sides are angry and ignore each other, which shows that the relationship between the two sides is already deep. When feelings develop to a certain extent and one party pays more for the other, there will naturally be more demands and demands, and there will be more angry capital. 5. Talking about privacy When the two sides talk about private topics, it can show that the relationship between a man and a woman has developed to a certain extent, which is the private space of two people. She is not your lover, but she seems to care about you and know you better than your lover. The ambiguous relationship between men and women often gives outsiders a feeling of seeing flowers in the fog, which makes people unpredictable. Little friends, what do you think of the ambiguous relationship? Do you crave extramarital affairs? You are welcome to talk about your experiences, and you can comment or participate in the interaction. What are the manifestations of ambiguity between men and women? To put it bluntly, for many modern people, love is to be taught, marriage is to be learned, but ambiguity is never taught. Because ambiguity has become a basic universal "language" for men and women in modern society. It is vague, obscure and profound, but because of such vagueness, concealment and profundity, it can always bring a fashionable, beautiful, impulsive, shortcut and high emotional intelligence imagination space to the parties. Although it seems to be in line with the fast pace of modern society, it even has a great fit with some human nature. Because, whether you are married or unmarried, whether you have a partner or not, quite a few modern people, from 70-year-old ladies to kindergarten children, have understood the "ambiguous way". On the other hand, it is another kind of passivity and evasion, such as cowardice, timidity, lack of self-confidence, fear of being hurt, unwillingness to take responsibility for one's past, or inability to make a practical plan for one's life. So, what is ambiguity? According to the book, ambiguity refers to the ambiguous relationship between men and women. It is a very special relationship between men and women, which exists between friendship and transcends friendship. Qian Zhongshu said: where there are many chickens and ducks, there are many dung and many women! . But now, Lan has to add a sentence at the back: Where there are many men and women, there will be more ambiguity! Take some cases that I have come into contact with in consultation over the years. How many men and women who already have partners, even married, always take pleasure in being coquettish and ambiguous outside? And how many single, unmarried people, even secretly married men and women, are always merciful when they are in inconsistent state and in a good mood and set foot on multilateral ships? So, with all due respect, ambiguity has long been more than friendship and love. More often, it will be a restless mood, temporarily uncontrollable hormones, exchange of interests, already designed routines, and games for married people. Let's take a look at the so-called "pick up girls", "flirt" and "strike up a conversation" skills and treasures that can be seen everywhere on the Internet. Which one of them is not making a fuss about ambiguity? In all these cases, there are too many so-called love at first sight, looking back and smiling, meeting and hating each other late, sharing, online dating, famous prostitutes, girlfriends, brothers and sisters, personal education assistants, colleagues and fellow villagers, and former spare tires. In fact, they are just a shield for ambiguity and desire. It must be said that many class reunions and WeChat groups have long been obvious and have become the hardest hit areas. When a woman is not ashamed to chat with you, she is willing to tell you all her secrets; When a man will always appear in time when you need it most; When a woman never avoids being alone with you; When a man can always remember some small details about you; When a woman and you are not husband and wife, they are always melodramatic, willful and angry in front of you; When a man and a woman are obviously not husband and wife, they are always willing to get along as lovers in many details ... these are just the most basic expressions of ambiguity. As the song "Poisonous Perfume" sings: "You smell her perfume, which is my nose's crime. You shouldn't smell her beauty, wipe everything off and sleep with you! Modern people seem to be more and more obsessed with this sad beauty of "I can't stop, I want to say it" and the pleasure of "I can't catch it myself, others always want it"! The song "Love in Hiroshima" summarizes word for word: What is the suffering of ambiguity? What is the poison of ambiguity? You should have rejected me a long time ago. You shouldn't have let me pursue it. You should give me a story I long for and leave a name I can't lose ... Crossing the moral boundary, we have crossed the forbidden zone of love, enjoyed the illusion of happiness and misunderstood the meaning of happiness ... As long as today, don't tomorrow, watch love slip through your fingers and say goodbye ... It is high time to stop the romantic game, even if we understand and separate, we are willing to be abandoned by you, and we don't want love with no answer ending. But it is often stupid and immoral, which will inevitably bring more instability to many marriages and families and even the whole society. What does this mean? Because ambiguity has become a social virus. For it, we have unconsciously become susceptible to almost everyone. And ambiguity is not exclusive, you can be ambiguous with a certain opposite sex, or you can be ambiguous with more people. Moreover, the more people who look capable, beautiful, have a good life, have a high emotional intelligence and have made "prosperity" contributions to society, the more likely they are to be infected. Even in some industries and fields, and in some circumstances, more and more people will be tacitly ashamed of "not knowing ambiguity and not having an ambiguous object". They will worry about being marginalized by the people around them, that others will say he is low, and that they can't get along because they don't understand ambiguity. As a result, more and more married people will confidently interpret such ambiguity as "taking part in accidental amusement" and naturally think, "What age is it now? Everyone is like this, and I can't pretend to be serious? " ! Therefore, from the realistic reaction, ambiguity often has a tragic sense of emotional anxiety, emotional utility, excessive desire and weak love. Although it is very common in today's society, it is a typical "pathological" behavior of laissez-faire and selfish mood!