My problem is that I am very passive about my feelings, which cannot be changed. But the family is happy, the job is stable, and there is a house and a car. So I tend to look for a mature, active, intelligent and interesting boy with a harmonious family. I also like him. Family, looks and work are not necessary.
Even with such a preset standard, in fact, I have met many people in a row, and no one likes it, which makes me doubt whether my standard should be lowered. But when I decided to force myself to accept someone, I felt very down-to-earth, uncomfortable and completely unable to make do with it.
Until I met a great god who met all my standards and hit it off. So I think it is reasonable to meet the preset standards of my own level. Stick to it, don't try to make do. Of course, the premise is that you have faced yourself objectively.
2, the purpose of the first meeting should not be too strong, and the expectation should be reduced. When I first started dating, I was very serious. I always think that blind date is the fate of parents and the tradition of matchmaker's words. I always feel that today's photos will be almost fixed tomorrow. It turned out that this was not the case at all. There are more photos and oil.
If you start with the idea that I want to spend my life with this stranger, you must have many negative thoughts-you can't get married without a house, it won't affect the next generation, and you can't communicate if you stutter. If you go with the idea of meeting new friends, you will naturally be more active. Even if you touch a suspected homosexual, you can consider it. I haven't got gay honey yet. It is good to know one. Believe me, positive thoughts are really important for blind date.
3. If you feel inappropriate, just refuse, don't procrastinate. Although the elders say it doesn't matter even if you don't look at it at first sight, you will get used to it for a long time. I have always found this statement unbelievable. I am a person who can't make do by myself. I have always believed that eye contact is very important from the beginning. Moreover, my friends around me have had several such lessons of blood and tears in recent years, all of which were inappropriate from the beginning, thinking that they could get along well and almost never succeeded.
In particular, a sister has already taken a wedding photo and booked a banquet, and she also repented the day before. She said that she still can't imagine living with this person all her life, even though they have been together for more than a year. Our generation is actually quite self-centered, unlike my parents' generation The social environment makes it easy to make do without many choices. I strongly disapprove of getting married for the sake of getting married.
In addition, in fact, most people may die of old age if they don't develop after marriage. In the past, I was afraid of a small circle, and I was afraid that I would meet awkwardly after the photos were inappropriate. Now I have no such concerns at all. Even if both WeChat and the phone were deleted, I basically didn't meet again. I don't have to be afraid to refuse too directly, but it is not good for the other party.