-01

“After lending 50,000 yuan to a friend, the friend deleted and blocked all contact information”

A male reader made the first two Tian sent me a private message asking for help. He said that he lent 50,000 yuan to a college classmate. He and his college classmate had been roommates in bunk beds for four years, and they had a very close relationship. When I was in college, several roommates would go to and from class every day. Extracurricular activities, studies, part-time jobs, almost all together.

The male reader has a particularly good relationship with this college roommate. When he was in college, he often didn't have enough living expenses, and every time, the roommate helped him and invited him to have dinner with him.

After graduation, the male reader went to a big city to develop his career. His salary has increased from more than 2K when he first started working as an intern to 12,000 after working for 4 years.

After graduation, the contact with my college roommates gradually became less and less. When I first graduated, I often chatted and made video calls to keep in touch with each other; but some of my college roommates got married and had children. There are children, and some roommates are struggling with their own careers; the relationship between them has been neglected, and everyone has their own new circle and their own new life.

No matter how good the relationship was at the time, after all, we did not develop in the same city, so it was inevitable that we would become estranged. Maybe we would see each other again in this life, but it was unknown. After all, we didn’t have much time.

The male reader said that he had not contacted his college roommate for several months. Suddenly one day, his college roommate came to him and told him that he had opened a shop and the purchase funds were not enough, and he wanted to borrow money from him. The 50,000 yuan will be used and returned to him within 3 months.

Out of friendship, and because the male reader felt that this roommate was kind to him during college, he did not hesitate and directly transferred 50,000 yuan to her.

It would take the male reader 4 months to earn back this 50,000 yuan; he had worked for 4 years and saved 200,000 yuan. He originally planned to go back to his hometown to buy a house and pay the down payment, but the male reader... I am relatively soft-hearted and loyal, so I decided to lend it to a friend for emergencies first.

Unexpectedly, three months have passed and the roommate has not mentioned the matter of repaying the money. Out of helplessness, the male reader finally asked to borrow money from his roommate, but the roommate found an excuse: the money must be paid back. If it hasn't arrived, I'll give it to you at the end of the month.

It was delayed from the end of the month to the end of the next month, and then for another 2 months.

When the male reader contacted this college roommate again, he discovered that all his contact information had been blocked.

After asking other roommates, I learned that the roommate who borrowed the money had already borrowed money from other roommates, but they were all rejected.

Only the male reader himself lent 50,000 yuan to this college roommate, but now he cannot contact him.

The distance between the two cities is more than 600 kilometers. Even if you go to his city, you don’t know where his family lives.

There is no IOU, the chat history is deleted, and although there is only a transfer record, it is difficult to recover the money.

Finally, the male reader said: If there is still no way to contact this roommate, the money may be lost.

-02

You can tell whether a person’s character is good or not by borrowing money once

How many people are constantly overdrafting their friends’ feelings and overdrafting their friends’ feelings for them? your trust?

In fact, I also lent some money to my friends for more than a year, but the other party never mentioned anything about repaying the money; every time I asked for a debt, the other party would always find an excuse to shirk the loan.

I felt relieved later. This money allowed me to get to know someone I once thought was a friend. Now it seems that this person trampled on both of us just for this little money. Feelings, what should I say?

When a person deals with others and interacts with others, the most basic bottom line should be: keep your word.

You must find a way to abide by the words you have said and the promises you have made, and complete them.

If you make an agreement with your friend to repay the borrowed money to the other party within 3 months, then you must find a way to fulfill this promise; if you can't do it, then don't make the promise to the other party easily.

Whether you are in a romantic relationship with the opposite sex or in an interpersonal relationship with friends, you must keep your trustworthiness.

If you break your trust once, the other person may think it's nothing; but if you always don't keep your word, you will soon make your friends stay away from you.

In the end, you become an "old bastard who borrows money but doesn't pay it back."

-03

How to refuse to borrow money without being rude and without hurting others’ dignity?

In this current environment, people who dare to lend you money must be cherished; after all, lack of credit is really the biggest stain on a person.

In life, you often encounter people borrowing money from you, either from friends or relatives; if you have money but don’t lend it to them, they will definitely Gossip behind your back.

But if you lend it out, you feel that it is not safe, because you will not get interest if you lend the money to the other party. If your friend uses the money, there is no way not to give it back.

If you are really inconvenient to lend money to the other party, or are unwilling to lend it to the other party, how should you refuse?

First: You can tell the other party that all my money is given to my wife for safekeeping. The financial power of the family does not belong to you. Your monthly living expenses are only a few hundred yuan. You dare not ask your wife for it. money spent.

Second: It can be said that you have something to do that costs a lot of money right now, such as buying a house, buying a car, enrolling your children in tutoring classes, etc.; if the other party asks you to borrow money, you Just say that your money is going to be used soon and there is no way to borrow it, or that you are also planning to borrow money. Instead, you should focus on the customer and ask the other party if they have money. In this case, the other party will definitely back down.

Third: It can be said that all your money has been deposited on a regular basis and cannot be withdrawn. If you do financial management, you cannot withdraw the money; in this case, you will also give the other party a step down.

If the other person is a smart person, he should be able to understand what you mean.

By not hurting the dignity of the other person, you avoid embarrassment, which is good for both of you.