He made a name for himself.
In the early years of Tianbao, Emperor Xuanzong of the Tang Dynasty, the famous minister He wrote to the court, demanding to retire to Wuzhong. Xuanzong Li Longji respected him very much and treated everything differently. When He Zhangzhi left, he said goodbye to Tang Xuanzong, and his eyes were full of tears. Tang Xuanzong asked him what other requirements he had. Zhang Zhi said: I know a son who hasn't been named yet. If your majesty gives you a name, it will be a great honor for the old minister to return home in clothes. "Xuanzong said:" Faith is the Tao, and those who are blessed believe it. Qing's son should be called Fu. "Know chapter and thank humbly. It took me a long time to realize. I thought to myself, "The emperor is so happy with me. I'm from Wu, and the word' fu' is followed by' zi'. He named my son Fu, didn't he call my son's paw? "
I don't know what poetry is.
Ai Zi likes to write poems. One day, Ai Zi swam between Qi and Wei and stayed in a hotel. In the evening, he heard a voice in the next room: "A song." After a while, he said, "One more song." Ai Zi was baffled and sleepy all night. Lying until dawn, * * * heard the man in the next room say about six or seven times, that is, six or seven songs. Ai Zi thought that the man in the next room must be a poet. He quietly concentrated on poetry at the foot of the mountain, and he felt respected inside. He also liked this man's quick thinking and decided to get to know him. Early in the morning, Ai Zi got dressed and got up, adjusted her crown belt and stood at the door to meet her. Soon, a vendor came out of the next room, thin and pale. Ai Zi was disappointed, thinking: With this respect, you look like a poet. Perhaps, people can't judge people by their appearances, and they can't guess blindly. He went up to him and asked, "I heard that Mr. Wang has many poems." Can I see them? " The man said, "I'm a businessman and I never know what poetry is." Ai Zi, who has always refused to write poetry, stubbornly said, "I heard you say' one' in the house last night, and then said' one'. Isn't that a poem? " Hearing this, the man couldn't help laughing: "You misunderstood. Last night, my stomach was upset. Every time I have diarrhea, I can't find toilet paper at night, so I wipe it with my hands. Diarrhea lasted all night, and my hands were dyed almost six or seven times. The' hand' I said is not the' first' of poetry. " Ai Zi felt ashamed to hear that.
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Su Shi was a great writer named Dongpo in the Song Dynasty. He often studies the meaning of words with Wang (An Shi). On one occasion, Dongpo pointed to the word "slope" and asked what Wang meant. Wang Anshi explained: "Slope is the skin of the earth." Hearing this, Dongpo disagreed and asked, "So, the word' slippery' is the bone of' water'?" Wang Anshi heard that he was speechless for a long time.
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I don't know for whom hard work sweetened Su Dongpo's words. As a magistrate in Hangzhou, he often joined the poet Fo Yin in meditation and singing, and they were the most friendly. Dongpo likes to cook pigs. When monks in Fo Yin lived in Jinshan Temple, they often cooked pigs and waited for Dongpo to eat. One day, Su Dongpo came to Jinshan Temple again, but the roast pig in Fo Yin was stolen by others. Fo Yin was very unhappy. Su Dongpo wrote a game poem to comfort Fo Yin: Yuan Gong sells wine and drinks Tao Qian, Fo Yin cooks pigs and other sons; After picking flowers into honey, I don't know who hard work is sweet to.
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Why did Su Dongpo go to He Xiucai's house for dinner one day when he was appointed as the deputy envoy of Huangzhou Yingyong? He Jia's avocado is crisp and delicious. Su Dongpo asked while eating, "What's the name of this avocado?" The host replied that he hadn't named it yet. Dongpo asked again, "Why?" (Why is it so brittle? The guests in the seat all said, "Why is it crisp?" Also, Chief Pan knows that Su Dongpo can't drink, and Dongpo specially prepares some low-grade sweet wine for him every time he comes to eat. Su Dongpo laughed and joked, "This wine must have been cooked wrong." One day, Su Dongpo suddenly had a whim and wanted to eat avocado, so he made a small poem to He Xiucai: there is nothing before drinking wild flowers, and the gourd is wrapped around his waist; I poured the wrong boiled water in Pan Zi, so I found your house easily.
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Su Dongpo and Jiang, both drug names, attended a friend's party and they sat together. During the dinner, Jiang first said a wine sequence: "You should all have a medicine name." So he pointed to Dongpo and said, "You are the name of the medicine." Dongpo puzzling, hurriedly asked. Jiang said to him, "Zi" Dongpo casually said to him, "You are also a medicine name. If it is not Pinellia ternata, it must be Magnolia officinalis. " Jiang Zhi was puzzled and asked what Dongpo said. Dongpo smiled and told him, "It's not Pinellia ternata and Magnolia officinalis, it's ginger."
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Su Dongpo, a word player, heard that Wang's Zi Shuo had just been written, so he went to the government to congratulate him and joked: "In the masterpiece, it is said that' bamboo' whips' horses' as' Benedict'. But I still have a question: "I don't know what's so funny about whipping dogs with bamboo?" Gong Jing just laughed and asked, "Is there any evidence that the word' pigeon' is changed from' bird' to' nine'? "Dongpo immediately replied:" The Book of Songs says:' The dead pigeon is in mulberry, and his son is seven', plus their parents, it is exactly nine. " Hearing this, Wang nodded happily. It was a long time before I knew that Su Dongpo had played a big joke with him again.
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There is a story in Qin that the poet Guo passed by Hangzhou and gave Su Dongpo a book of poems written by him for his appreciation. Before Dongpo could read the poem, he began to recite it vividly and read it with emotion. After singing the poems, I asked Dongpo's opinion: "What can Zheng Xiang say about these poems?" Dongpo said without thinking, "Ten points." Guo exultation, and asked why there can be very. Dongpo smiled and answered, "You just recite poems, seven points come from reading and three points come from poems. Isn't it ten o'clock? "
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When Su Dongpo was demoted to Huangzhou by the imperial court, he supervised the business tax work in Huangzhou. A scholar wrote a letter to Dongpo asking for tax relief for his family. The letter said: "I have no goods on board, so I can't pay taxes." Everything is at your command. Please let me go to Jingnan House to retrieve my dead father's coffin. The officials laughed their heads off when they saw it.
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Well, your Su Dongpo is generous and straightforward, and he can't let things go in his heart. He once said, "If there is a fly in the food, you must spit it out." Every time Chao (Chao Duanyan) goes to see Dongpo, Dongpo always says so. Once, Dongpo said to Uncle Mei, "I was selected by Zhaoling in Xianke. At that time, Wen Kuijun often became bosom friends with Yan. When I called ministers in the temple, I was always honest with current events and was recognized by the emperor. Soon, I repeatedly presented the remarks in the last chapter. Although very straightforward, the emperor never complained. If it weren't for my advice to the court, who could give pertinent advice? What I am worried about now is that the court will kill me. " Mei Shu was speechless. Dongpo sighed and said, "If the imperial court really wants to kill me, what is the pity in my life?" . It's just better for you after killing me. "The two of them then burst into laughter.
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Shi (Shi Yannian), a literati poet, is addicted to alcohol and has the genius of Li Chenxian (Taibai). Man Qing's behavior is dissolute. He is good at talking about harmony and quiet. On one occasion, Shi rode a horse to visit Baoning Temple. The groom lost control for a while, and the horse jumped off and accidentally fell to the ground. The attendants quickly picked him up and put him in the saddle. When pedestrians saw this, they all gathered to watch, thinking that he would be furious and scold the centaur for a while. Unexpectedly, Shi slowly raised his whip and said half jokingly to the man who led the horse, "Fortunately, I am a Shi Bachelor. If I were a bachelor of tile, wouldn't it have been broken long ago? "
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Huang Tingjian, a book about changing sheep, jokingly said to Su Shi: "The word of Wang Xizhi, a great calligrapher in the Eastern Jin Dynasty, was dubbed the word" changing goose "by the world; Today, Han Zongru is insatiable. Every time he gets a picture of you, he goes to the handsome Lin Yao in the temple to buy ten catties of meat. In this way, you can call your calligraphy a sheep-changing book. "One day, Su Shi was busy writing a story in the Hanlin Academy, when Han Zongru sent someone to send a letter in order to get Su Shi to reply, in exchange for his words. Everyone was standing under the door, and the governor was in a hurry. Su Shi smiled and said to him, "Go back and tell your boss that you will cut off his meat today. "
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Wang Meng, an old lady with a golden face, went to the appointment. Every guest in the family must be served with tea. At that time, people jokingly called it "there is a flood today." Su Dongpo visited a family in his early years. The host is hospitable and urges tea again and again. Dongpo was so embarrassed that he smiled and said to his master, "The so-called old woman painted her face." The host doesn't understand this meaning-put (tea), put (tea).
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First a thief, then an official. There was a great pirate named Zheng Guang in Fujian. Later, he surrendered to the court, and the court sealed him an official position. Once, Zheng Guang and his colleagues sang wine and poems together, so everyone sang poems together and urged Zheng Guang to write a poem. Zheng Guang was forced to sing at random: "Don't ask civil servants and military attaché s, it's always so-so. The official rank is to be an official and then a thief, while Zheng Guang is a thief and then an official. " Hearing this, everyone burst into laughter.
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When Pu Chuan was appointed as the prefect of Hangzhou, one day, an alchemist came to offer condolences. The alchemist is about ninety years old, but his face is as fresh as a baby. Pu Zheng Chuan entertained him happily, and they had a very speculative talk. Zheng Chuan prayed to him for a long life. The alchemist replied, "My immortality is extremely simple. Basically, there is nothing to be taboo, only one thing to remember is that sexual desire must be banned. " Zheng Chuan listened, bowed his head and thought for a long time, and sighed, "If so, what good will it do to live for more than a thousand years?"
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Avoid saying the word "fall". Liu Mian, a scholar in the Tang Dynasty, was the most taboo by nature. When I took the imperial examination in my early years, the examiner talked to him. I didn't pay attention, so I said the word "fall", but I was angry and rude. If a servant makes a mistake of "falling down", he will be hit with a stick. So when servants talk to him, they often refer to "happiness" as "well-being". On this day, he suddenly heard that the list was posted and quickly sent a servant to see it. After a while, the servant ran back, and Liu Mian hurried forward and asked, "Is my name on the list?" The servant sighed and replied, "The scholar has recovered."
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In the Song Dynasty, people called the son-in-law selected from the imperial examination list "husband". The expression "my husband" probably comes from Yuan, a scholar in the Eastern Jin Dynasty, but it is really unreasonable. As far as the imperial examination scholars on the list are concerned, some of them are unwilling to be the son-in-law of others, but forced to surrender by powerful people. There was a new boy, handsome in appearance and handsome in manner, admired by a powerful person and wanted to choose his own husband. A powerful and powerful mission, a dozen servants, surrounded the new teenagers into their houses. Along the way, the young man walked happily, without any intention of escaping or refusing. At the door of the dignitaries' house, the people who came to watch almost surrounded a human wall, three floors inside and three floors outside, which was very lively. After a while, an official dressed in gold and purple came out of the room and met the new boy. He laughed and said, "I only have one daughter, and she looks good." I am willing to marry you as a good friend of Qin Jin. I don't know what you think? " The boy quickly bowed and thanked him, saying, "I am a humble person, and I am lucky to trust the halls." It's just that I am a young man. How about I discuss it with my wife when I get home and give you an answer? "Hearing this, everyone laughed.