There is a true story in "Brother Feng Talks about Sex": My colleague Xiao Ding's house was repeatedly illuminated for a long time by lights of different colors from the surrounding buildings every night. "Different lights can stimulate different 'sexual interests'," Zhang Feng said. Green lights tend to delay men's erections, while red lights can speed up erections.

Creating interest should vary from person to person. Citing research by American psychologists, Zhang Feng pointed out that sex music can not only stimulate the activity of the nervous and muscular systems, but also increase people's excitement and arouse sexual desire very quickly. However, people with different personalities also choose different sex music. For example, the first choice sex music for lingering people and the first choice for impatient people are also different. If you choose the wrong music, you will be like your AMMY boyfriend. Not only does it not help sex, but you will feel irritated and sexually interesting. Nothing. Lighting aromatherapy during sex can help couples enjoy sex, but some people prefer their partner's body odor to fragrance, believing that natural body odor is more sexy and more arousing.

The tips circulated on the Internet should also be based on the rough and the essential, and should not be followed blindly. "There are no fixed rules for boudoir fun. You can only refer to other people's experiences and lessons, not copy them." Zhang Feng pointed out that happiness, no injury, and voluntariness are the prerequisites for sex.

“My boyfriend thinks I am too crazy when it comes to sex”

Narrator: AMMY, 26 years old, clerk

Nowadays, “mistresses” are rampant, and I I heard many real stories from girlfriends about their husbands and boyfriends going out to "get out". The lesson they learned is that "women who are more conservative and passive in sex cannot keep men's hearts."

I felt a little anxious after hearing this. To be honest, today's society has too high requirements for women. They must be good-looking, able to run a household, and have temperament. Now that "sexual life is interesting" is added, the pressure is really big. My boyfriend is eight years older than me. He has a talented appearance and a gentle personality. His career is on the rise and he is usually more popular with women. I love him very much and decided to work hard to reach this new standard, which not only allows him to enjoy it, but also makes him fascinated and does not give the "mistress" a chance.

I strictly followed the "goblin tips" circulated on the Internet to increase the interest, and took the initiative to suggest that we try "car vibration" with him in the car, or have sex in the bathroom. However, he didn't seem to care much about my efforts. At night, I put on my sexy underwear and teased him in every possible way, but he didn't react in particular, or he would just deal with it quickly and then fall asleep. During sex, I played fast-paced, exciting "sex-promoting" music, but he found it too noisy. I light incense and spray perfume to increase my temptation, but he finds it pungent. I bought men's sexy underwear as a gift for him, but he never wears it.

The most aggrieved time was when we drove out for fun. I made some hints in the car, but he awkwardly held down my restless hand and even lectured me, "Don't go crazy in public places." It was quite embarrassing. Is it wrong for me to pursue interest for him? Is it because I haven’t found out his preferences, or is he no longer interested in me?

I don’t understand the interest that other women can accept. Why is it so unbearable for her?

Beware of excessive pursuit of boudoir fun.

“It’s right to pay attention to fun in sex life, but you can’t be too pushy or even fall into a state of anxiety. "Dr. Yang Guosheng, director of the Department of Urology and Andrology of the Second People's Hospital of Guangdong Province, pointed out that sexual life requires the cooperation of both men and women, and the time and method should not be too deliberate. Excessive pursuit of "tricks" in sexual life will not only not help warm up the relationship, but may lead to sexual abuse, "too much is not enough".

Many people regard the sexual promotion methods in Japanese AV films as "fun" educational films. In this regard, Yang Guosheng believes that many actions in AV films are exaggerated performances and cannot be completed in normal sexual life. Quite a few actions are wrong demonstrations, even sexual abuse, which will make the partner feel disrespected, just like Quanhua's wife. Some actions, such as doggy style and anal intercourse, can also cause damage to the partner's genitals and leave a psychological shadow.

Psychological counselors also pointed out that excessive pursuit of interest in sexual life can even develop into "interest anxiety disorder" and feel that "without interest, the quality of sexual life will be compromised", which actually reflects the lack of interest in one's own charm. Not confident. This kind of self-righteous interest may not be what your partner really needs, but it just satisfies your own psychological expectations and temporarily relieves your anxiety. In fact, even if their partner cooperates against their will, people with the tendency of "interest anxiety disorder" will continue to be anxious because they do not understand their partner's true needs.