The so-called friends are nothing more than people who have more contact with themselves and are more intimate. Make deep friends, you can talk about everything. However, friends have real friends and fake friends. It's really a fortune to have true friends. Unfortunately, making false friends sometimes leads to fire. A friend in need, a friend in cloth and a friend who has forgotten the past year can all be regarded as true friends. A cup of tea and fresh water is very speculative, and we have made great progress in our talks, and we deeply feel that we have met each other for a long time.
"One more friend leads to another road". With more friends, is the road really easy? In today's society, it is in the period of market transition. Although the economy is developing rapidly, we can't underestimate the gradual decline of the world. When all kinds of people emerge, we really have to stay calm when making friends.
so, what is the meaning of friends?
"friend" is defined in the dictionary as "people who have friendship with each other". Judging from the shape of the word "friend", the combination of two bright moons that set each other off pays attention to a sincere and harmonious relationship. The ancients defined "friends" very strictly. In the Ming Dynasty, Su Jun, a great scholar, divided friends into four categories: intimate friends, friend-fearing friends, thief friends and close friends, and regarded "morality and morality as a mutual encouragement, negligence as a rule, urgency as a supply, and life and death as the highest realm of friends".
However, with the change and development of the times, the expansion of economic activities and the increase of social contacts, the very pure term "friend" has been labeled as a commodity, which is popular in the contemporary era. "Many friends lead many roads" and "Many friends lead many roads" have become a creed in today's society. Today's "friends" are like markets, with business cards flying all over the sky, friends all over the world, "friends like clouds" and "weddings" everywhere. In fact, everyone knows very well that the word "friend" is no longer the hereditary territory of personal feelings, but a "passport" that everyone can create indiscriminately to get through relationships. For those who are good at this, "friends" are still information, momentum, stars holding the moon, closing the bridge, and a magic weapon to avoid difficulties. Of course, they also know the side effects of this kind of "friend": sometimes it is a headache, sometimes it is a laxative, and sometimes it is like a group of liars and robbers who massage their emotions.
There's a song that goes well: It's hard to find friends in a thousand miles, but with many friends, it's easy to walk, treat each other sincerely, and promise each other with your heart … We have good friends everywhere. This song reminds us that we should make more friends. With more friends, the road under our feet can be better. But in real life, this is not necessarily the case, sometimes it is just the opposite. After a thorough study, we will know that many friends in this world are based on material interests. Once there is no interest, natural people will be cold when they leave tea, and the relationship may be broken.
At ordinary times, some so-called "hardcore" friends, fair-weather friends and even casino friends. On weekdays, it is very hot. You eat and I eat. Don't look at "hardcore buddies" and swear that "one person is in trouble, draw a sword to help". Once something really happens, some people often help. As the saying goes, "If you are near Zhu Zhechi, you will be black if you are near Mexico", "It is not enough to learn well for a thousand days, but it is more than enough to learn badly for a day", and "Learn well with good people, and follow the master to dance with false gods". Therefore, the more people make friends, the better. Look at the officialdom friends again, and the situation is different. Perhaps these words are very reasonable, such as "there must be a big bad when there is a good one" and "there is a distance to be beautiful". Don't say everything when you are happy, and say what you shouldn't. Once the relationship is stiff, it may become a "shell" for the other party to attack you. Lewinsky, the "sexual friend" of former US President Bill Clinton, handed over to Trilu, a middle-aged woman in the news office, when she was an intern at the White House. She told the whole story and was completely recorded, so she regretted it. Officials should be more careful, not to look down on people. There are many friends outside, and people will inevitably want something. No matter how many good things are done, as long as one thing is not promised, sometimes they will become enemies. The most taboo for an official is to make a big money, and he will be familiar with it once and for all. It seems that friends are very enthusiastic, and I don't know that the other party is designing everything, being persuasive and pressing. When money and beautiful women are delivered to your door, you will lose your dignity and fall into the abyss of crime carelessly, and your life will be over.
Making friends is really a science. It's simple to say, and profound to say. But remember: the more friends, the better. If you pay less, you can see clearly, but if you pay more, it will inevitably be excessive. If you are not careful, it will affect your life. There is a story that three friends were caught in a storm and drifted to a desert island, surrounded by vast sea water, and there was nothing on the island, which can be said to be desperate. At this time, a fairy came and asked everyone to make a wish. He asked A and A hesitated for a while and said, I'll think it over. Let B and C speak first. The fairy asked B again, and B said, I just want to lie on the beach in California and bask in the sun. A gust of wind blew, and B got what he wanted; The fairy asked C, and C said: I have been wandering outside for many years, and I hope to return to my hometown and live with my wife and son. After a gust of wind blew, C got what he wanted. At this time, the fairy asked A again, and A said, I still can't make up my mind. Usually, my friends are in charge. Can you ask them to come back and help me make up my mind? Another gust of wind blew, A's wish came true, and B and C returned to the desert island.
The story is so simple. What does it mean?
People who have no ideas not only make themselves desperate, but also drag down their friends and ruin their future and happiness. A is not bad, just no idea. For a person, if you say a friend like A, you can only hurt yourself unnecessarily. Through such an example, don't we understand that it is good to make more friends?
when you regard others as friends, you may not be able to become friends. Because you are willing to treat him as a friend, but he may not be willing to treat you as a friend. In actual communication, everyone is polite and smiling. Who can see through whether it is true under the belly? Because there may be no friends who are really pure and irrelevant to the real "interests", too many are mixed with "utilization and interests"; Once "utilization and benefit" are asymmetrical, friends will not exist.
There was a man who was a small person in charge of a power department. Because of his special position, he made many friends in all aspects. Friends hold him and respect him, and people look for him all day, either for dinner or for entertainment. Naturally, he is also entertaining around, and the most worrying thing is that he can't do anything at once. But in the eyes of outsiders, they can see clearly that his friends are nothing more than a so-called "same body of interests" under the system. Without the interaction of interests, these people will immediately be scattered. It has been said that the commodity economy society is a society with interactive interests, and friends should also be "quantified" according to the so-called cost.
The more friends you have, the less time you have for yourself. You have to go to a friend's party, and it's hard for you to refuse when a friend invites you to do something. In this way, friends will affect their own lives. It would be much better if there were fewer friends.
Nowadays, people pay more and more attention to circles, so they frequently shuttle to various parties: reminiscing about the past, having dinner with colleagues, celebrating weddings ... However, while actively contacting feelings, modern people's "emotional investment" is becoming more and more expensive, and "emotional consumption" is becoming more and more tired. "With more friends, it's easier to walk" and "Relying on parents at home and friends when going out" are all reasonable, but the question is, with more friends, will the time and energy allocated to each friend decrease? If so, it will inadvertently neglect or hurt some friends. The song "Make new friends, don't forget old friends" is good, but who can do it?
"friends" are entering an alienated and tasteless area with the changes of society. Friendship hides business feelings, friendship turns into fear, friendship is immersed in interests, and friendship is difficult. In the officialdom of "we two officials going opposite ways", people who call friends and flatter each other are like Mu Suixin and Ma Xiangdong. Once upon a time, it was also a gang of friends who colluded with each other and became a corrupt gang that supported each other. Instead of benefiting one party, it was a disaster. In the end, Wang Tong's warning of the Sui Dynasty was answered: "Those who pay attention to the situation will be absolutely rejected.". In society, the phenomenon of "killing the ripe" in order to benefit each other has already made people "talk about friends". Some once rampant pyramid schemes have caused many relatives and friends to go bankrupt and have no way out; Friends set up shops and raise funds to set up factories together. If they don't lose money, they will wrangle, and if they earn money, they will fight red-eyed. Friends who help you rent a facade may have made money; Friends who help you raise funds may be collecting usury; Friends who help you introduce your business may kill you with a kickback ... If the times become all about being a gold digger, the sense of rights replaces the sense of responsibility, and the sense of money replaces the sense of career, then "friends" will inevitably lose their due brilliance and be drowned by "eclipses" such as "potential" and "profit".
Of course, these are not to deny friends, but to let people have a deeper understanding of the word "friends". It is impossible to live without friends; But to be friends, there should be minimum principles. As the saying goes, "The river is clear and muddy, and friends are true and false", "Flowers are fragrant, and butterflies are willing to come and go; People are good and friends are willing to come and go. " We should treat our friends sincerely with our true hearts, make more friends like plane mirrors, be friends like plane mirrors, and learn to recognize them. Don't let some friends who don't want to take you down the wrong path!
everyone wants to have countless friends, but sometimes things are not as perfect as they thought. Although there are a lot of friends around, there are not many really intimate friends.
some people say that it is enough to have a friend who can be intimate with you all your life, but in many cases, you know people's faces but don't know their hearts. If you treat others sincerely, will others treat you in the same way? This seems to be another problem, so we can only keep lowering the standards of friends. In the end, the standards of friends are getting lower and lower, even if a friend is a "person". Unfortunately, such a low standard is often the most difficult to achieve, because many friends have really lost their human nature and can't even be regarded as a "person" at all.
As the ancients said, friends are friends of gentlemen and friends of villains, friends have different levels, and friends are true or false. All these are measured by standards, and this standard is up to everyone, because only they know what kind of friends they need.
True good friends don't need too many. It's important to have heart-to-heart talks. One or two intimate friends are enough. If you make too many friends, there will be a lot of scattered feelings.
when you are with your friends, you have a pleasure that permeates your body and mind, and you are deeply moved, so you have realized the profound meaning of your friends.
if people live in society, they must have friends. Friends are true and false, and if you make true friends, you will be able to use them all your life; If you make false friends, you will be unlucky for life. Therefore, the more friends you have in the real society, the better. You must be careful in making friends.