I once saw a set of data on a program called "With All due respect": more than 70% of men said they would not confess all their love history to their partners.

For boys, they are more inclined to "one less thing is worse than one more thing". Once it has passed, they don't want to mention it again.

The findings for women are exactly the opposite. What women value more is loyalty, whether the other party is absolutely loyal to them. If they feel that the other party can hide something, it is a sign of deception and insincerity.

Recently, a friend of mine, Jiajia, encountered such a situation. She is 28 years old and has a simple love history. She has only been in love since she was a child.

Some time ago, I was introduced by a friend to a boy who I liked very much. Jiajia had a good impression of him, and the two of them met several times one after another. They ate and watched movies together like a couple.

One night the two of them were chatting about the past, and Jiajia couldn't help but ask him: "How many girlfriends have you had before?" However, the other party did not answer directly and avoided the topic. Jiajia felt very uncomfortable and felt that the other party was not honest.

In fact, this problem can be said to be an eternal problem. If you don't confess, the girl will think that you have an old relationship that is unforgettable; if you confess, this is undoubtedly not a proposition, and it will cause endless troubles in the future.

There is this case around me. When a young man was in love with his girlfriend, he told everything about his past, including what we did together when we were in love, what meals we had, and what scenery we saw. Every detail was told.

But later on, the two of them still didn't make it to the end. For example, when the boy cooked for the girl, the girl would remember that the boy would cook for his ex-girlfriend before, and then she would get very angry.

As time goes by, no matter how good the relationship is, it cannot withstand speculation and suspicion.

After all, no current person will like to hear about your past good memories and the advantages of your ex, what you have done with your ex, what you have experienced together, don’t talk about these details. Too specific.

It is very likely that your confession in detail will destroy all the trust you have accumulated in this relationship.

"Qi Pa Shuo" mentioned a concept in the program before, called frankness and frankness.

When dealing with past love history, do not distort the facts, do not deceive, do not deliberately conceal, do not pretend to cover up, just be honest and love truly.

Treat every relationship honestly, but you don’t necessarily have to tell everything in detail.

In fact, we all have to allow our significant other to have one or several people in our hearts before meeting you, and allow them to love each other, even if they once loved each other stupidly, even if they once loved each other, You have to live and die.

Now that you have chosen him, you must learn to tolerate his past, because each of us is an independent individual, and even the most intimate relationship cannot be tied or possessed.

I have seen this conversation on Douyin before:

“When I think about the fact that he has been to some places with his ex-girlfriend and eaten those delicious foods, I don’t want to care about him”

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"Actually, I have been to this place before"

"With whom"

"I can't remember, but now that I am with you, I feel The mood is better and the scenery is more beautiful.”

After listening to this passage, I felt deeply.

Sometimes we are often unhappy in relationships. In fact, the big reason is that we hold on to the past, but completely forget that the scenery in front of us is actually better and better.

Only by not dwelling on the past, not clinging to the past, and waving goodbye to the past can we embrace a better tomorrow together.

Just like Liang Sicheng asked Lin Huiyin: "There is a saying, I will only ask you once, and I will never ask you again. Why me?" Lin Huiyin replied: "The answer is very long, and I will spend my whole life answering it. You."

Yes, maybe I can't be involved in your past, but I hope that you will not be absent from my present and future.

A person who truly loves you will accept everything in your past and will cherish your present and future. Cherish meeting each other and face the difficulties in life together.

A good relationship requires two people to cherish each other and care for each other carefully, so that it can finally blossom and bear fruit.