1952, from Beijing. Doctor of Sociology, University of Pittsburgh, USA. 1999 was rated as one of the 50 most influential figures in China by Asia Weekly.
Li Yinhe wrote that she loves sadomasochism, that is, 5M. Recalling that when she was young, she paid attention to the flogging punishment and the humiliation of the man in the movie, and even read sexy from the sentence that Jia Baoyu was beaten.
I have never seen such a frank person since I was a student, and I am also a serious scholar! This makes me both happy and admired, and my soul is shocked. So I immediately downloaded the book and read it at one breath. It was already late at night.
There are two things that impressed me about this book. First of all, she is very frank and writes a lot of her real thoughts and experiences. Secondly, and most importantly, she affirmed a person's personality and the meaning of personality. Because in my life, I have been in a state of ignoring my true feelings for a long time. Since I went to college, I want to change this state slowly. I want to respect my feelings and my true thoughts. Therefore, I am particularly disgusted with using unified requirements to ask everyone, especially like some remarks that respect individuality.
Honesty and respect for individuality, these two characteristics are most obvious in Li Yinhe's sadomasochism story.
As for sadomasochism, she has personally experienced it, published academic works and even created some novels through scientific research. From the academic point of view, it affirms the rationality of sadomasochism, and even claims that sadomasochism is a noble and elegant lifestyle, because it is based on not worrying about food and clothing and equality between the two sides. There is a detail in the book. She said Wang Xiaobo bought 5M props, just like buying flowers.
In China, there are not many people who can be honest about the topic of sex, and even fewer people can deeply analyze it. I don't know if sex is right or wrong. The ideas in my mind all come from film and television novels and surrounding remarks, but they conflict with each other. External remarks, that is, traditional ideas, are low-key and abstract, and you can even say that they are very rigorous things. Traditional ideas require women to be very loyal and pure. You can't like sex, and you can't express your love for sex. You must be an innocent woman, shy and even disgusting, and you must remain a virgin before marriage. Film and television novels are more open. In recent years, the development of online novels has further expanded its openness. People put on vests on the Internet to write about love and desire. But novels are very private things. Neither readers nor authors will support one of their preferences in public when facing sensitive topics. In public, we are all politically correct people. We are all the same people, with the same attitude and the same standards. The difference between the heart and the outside world has caused conflicts, and I don't know what to believe. I don't understand many personalized things. Is he a demon or not? But ... this book subverts my opinion, and she demonstrates that sadomasochism is an elegant way of sexual life. Just as an authoritative scholar told you for sure, what you really think is meaningful and reasonable.
Li Yinhe's honesty, I think, may be because she went to America to study sociology. However, the reason why she went to the United States to study this degree at her own expense may also be due to her personality.
I especially respect personalized things, but I am also a politically correct person in my daily life. A natural pressure requires me to be consistent with others. The contradiction between behavior and heart produces pain. This kind of pain forced me to keep looking for the idea of freedom and its supporters. I will pay attention to a lot of marginalized things, a lot of personality things, especially want to respect it and maintain it. I think this kind of maintenance is not to affirm or deny the matter itself, but to say that I have such an attitude: I respect everyone's personality. In this way, I can gradually affirm that my personalized side is legal and reasonable.
There is a theory in legal research that emphasizes that the minority is subordinate to the majority, as if the interests of the minority are smaller than those of the majority. I am disgusted with such rude judgment in class. Everyone is different and everyone is priceless. Respecting this difference is the proper attitude of the law, not simply that the minority is subordinate to the majority.
Many people like reading, traveling and making friends. The meaning behind these behaviors, I think, is to see more people with different lifestyles. Only in this way can we better understand the world. Or get to know ourselves better. By accepting others' personalized things, you can accept your own personalized things and find the balance of life. Once this balance is reached. People's life will become very comfortable, just like a river, with flowing power.
We often talk about procrastination, the harm of family background, and the contradiction of intimate relationship. Faced with these problems, there is nothing we can do. Why can't you do anything? Because the power is suppressed. Taking female characteristics as an example, society requires women to be silly, pampered, indisputable and gentle, but everyone has a water chestnut, which is different. As Li Yinhe said: Women are people first, and then women. Marx once said: I have everything that people have. So why can't women have what men have? If all the water chestnuts are ground. It's true that you can have everything in life, but you are really trapped in the corner. Your strength has also disappeared, because you have accepted a passive lifestyle. You will feel uncomfortable. I have read Wu Zhihong's books before. He emphasized respect for his aggressiveness. What do you mean? You should dare to do evil. I once chatted with my classmates in college. I'm just saying that I'm a bad person, because if someone hurts me, I'll want to retaliate severely. He directly refuted my sentence: if someone hurts you, you get back at him. This is just, this is not evil. I froze. Looking back now, I was very disrespectful of my feelings and used to using strict dogma to restrain myself. This constraint is imperceptible. Because the real me has been defeated, hiding in the corner to survive. How can people who live in dogma be full of power?
I was very tired when I was in college. It is very painful to do things without motivation. Even if I work part-time. After a positive period of time, you will fall into a very decadent state. Forcing people to fall into decadence and circulate repeatedly in my life. Later reading, Jobs, Louise; Hai said that it will be very powerful to find something you really like to do. I began to discover what I really like to do. But I find it difficult, because I have never experienced the process of listening to my heart in my long-term depressed life, and I don't know how to listen to my true thoughts. I remember being confused at that time, because I didn't know what I really liked. I didn't realize at that time that I didn't really want to hear the real idea, so he had reached a corner. I haven't seen him for a long time. I don't think anything is true.
Fortunately, I came into contact with Reconstruction of Life, which is really a life-saving book. I'm glad to meet it. After reading it, one day, I lay in bed and thought, Never mind if anything else is wrong. What am I doing now? I am sleeping. Ok, then lie comfortably in the soft bed and relax in the quilt! At that moment, I experienced silence. Those threatening teachings have gone away from me, and the smell of quilts lingers in my ears. Of course, change takes time, and then I practiced the present strength, yoga and meditation, and came into contact with books such as The Second Sex, Women Need Dreams, and Kinsey's Sexology Report. I learned to accept myself, from changing my ideas to changing my behavior. When I was a graduate student, I faced up to my writing desire and began to write simple books. I am no longer afraid of the desire to pursue my ideals, but open my heart to real thoughts and actions. Gradually, I began to feel interested in my own areas, and slowly moved towards my favorite direction.
In the process of this exploration, I met many interesting things, including the book "Collecting Honey on Earth". It is a new inspiration and shock from quantitative change to qualitative change. I have always thought that love is just a part of life. Freshmen like to discuss freedom in law class, and are unconsciously attracted by the Greek idea of freedom, refusing to say that they must get married and have children. ; ; ; ; ; As Jobs said, these points that make up my life all point to the same place, that is, respect for individuality and self-achievement. Like Li Yinhe, it is my dream to study marginal topics, get in touch with an incredible lifestyle and talk about a lifelong love without marriage and children.
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