Method 1: Choose a social method that suits you

Almost all people who are not good at socializing have a misunderstanding: that is, they default to being a person who cannot socialize, and those around them Those who are good at social interaction will naturally become role models, thinking that his way of doing things is the correct way, and communication with others should be like him to have smooth communication.

Have you ever thought that your personality, preferences, and social environment may not be exactly the same as others.

For example, you obviously like a quiet personality. In order to expand your social circle, you imitate others in disco and partying, but in the end you can't fit in at all, even if you meet new people in the process. My friend, you can't confide in him, after all, you two are not the same person at all.

So, what suits you is the best. Think clearly about what you want first, and then adjust your social style appropriately.

For example, if you are an otaku who likes to play games, then first find a few more game interest groups online, participate in topic discussions in the groups, observe whether there are friends who can further develop, and then filter the same city. Or people who are engaged in similar work, deepen your contact with them and become real friends. In this way, your social circle will be gradually built up.

Of course, expanding your interests and hobbies can also allow you to integrate into more circles. After you get to know more friends in this way, you can selectively participate in some social activities, such as your interest in photography. If you are interested, you can make an appointment with a friend for outdoor photography in your free time; for example, if you both like traveling, you can make an appointment for a self-driving trip during the short vacation. Maybe you will have an affair during the trip, so that your single career will be just around the corner. . Method 2: When communicating with others, pay more attention to the topic itself

Many times, when we communicate with others, we will focus on the other person. From appearance to clothing to hairstyle, it feels very You understand the other person, but in fact you know nothing about them. If you pay too much attention to people, you can easily fall into a situation of trying to please the other person, and the whole process will be more embarrassing.

So, if you are a socially awkward person and want to have a good chat with others, the best way is to pay more attention to the topic itself, which can also effectively alleviate your anxiety when communicating with others. Unnatural feeling.

Some veterans may say that I really can’t handle the topics they talk about, so how can I make friends with them? It's actually very simple, you just need to think of ways to extend the topic to areas where you have something to say.

For example, you are chatting with a girl and she is talking about cosmetics, but you know nothing about cosmetics. Then you can simply agree first, and then say at the right time: Your cosmetics will be there Buy online?

Now that online shopping is so developed, girls will definitely buy cosmetics online. Then you can talk about an impressive online shopping experience you have, or a joke you have heard about online shopping cosmetics. The topic of cosmetics was brought to the topic of online shopping, and the awkward conversation was self-defeating. Method 3: Self-exposure

In social psychology, there is a concept called "self-exposure". It refers to individuals telling others personal information about themselves and sharing their feelings and beliefs with others." That is, a person spontaneously and consciously exposes his true and important information to another person and tells others Talk from your heart, state yourself frankly, and promote yourself.

Self-disclosure is divided into four levels. The first level is about your interests and hobbies, and the second level is about your hobbies and living habits. Attitudes, such as opinions on a certain current political news or a celebrity's gossip; the third level is about self-awareness and personal interpersonal relationships, such as one's own social relationships, one's relationship with family, friends, etc. The fourth level is about privacy, such as some unknown secrets of oneself.

So it is not difficult to explain why some old guys can never get into people's hearts when chatting with girls, because they always stay at the first level. One level.

If we want to get closer to others in social activities, we have to evolve from simply talking about things to talking about emotions. For example, when talking about food, we may just talk about it. They can talk about their food preferences and at most recommend delicious food restaurants to each other. In this way, everyone only exchanges information and does not convey emotional value.

But you joke, "It turns out we are all foodies, no wonder we can chat so well", or "It turns out you like spicy food, which suits your hot personality." This is how the other person talks. Emotions were aroused.

Huang Lizi Ye: An emotional mentor who understands men

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