Philosophical stories about making friends: How to choose friends

In the late Eastern Han Dynasty, Hua Xin and Guan Ning were two good friends. But soon, the two "separated their seats and sat down". The cause was two small things. One day, two friends were hoeing together. Suddenly, Guan Ning dug out a piece of gold, but he turned a blind eye. When Hua Xin saw it, he quickly picked it up and took it as his own. On the surface, Guan Ning still pretended not to see anything, but in his heart he was extremely dissatisfied with Hua Xin's greed. Some time passed, and one day, the two friends were sitting on the floor together reading. Guan Ning was engrossed in reading, not listening to what was going on outside the window. But Hua Xin was absent-minded. As if he was looking for and expecting something, just at this moment, an official passed by the door in a gorgeous carriage. Guan Ning was unmoved and was still reading, but Hua Xin threw down the book and went to watch, looking very... An envious look.

Through the above two small things, Guan Ning realized that Hua Xin's character was completely different from his own, so he sat down and resolutely broke off relations with him.

What Guan Ning values ??is the character of his friends, not anything else.

"Purity and turbidity must come from different sources; conquering the wind cannot fly together." Fu Xuan's poem from Jin Dynasty expresses the importance of choosing friends, just like the reason why water is clear and turbid is because of different sources. , just like the reason why the wild duck and the wind do not want to fly together is because they have different interests. "If we have different paths, we will not conspire against each other." If people have different opinions and pursuits, they will not cooperate together, let alone become friends.

It is enough to have a confidant in life. A confidant is a like-minded person. Only if a common cause connects each other, will it last long and be reliable. Otherwise, even if we become friends, it will be difficult to keep them. Therefore, to make friends, you must be sincere. It is not advisable to make friends who seem to be incompatible with each other.

To make friends, in a sense, is to make friends with morality. The quality of friends has a huge impact on a person. Making a good friend will benefit you throughout your life; making a bad friend will not only cause endless harm, but may also cause irreparable losses. Therefore, we must make friends with high moral character, which will be beneficial to ourselves and society. As the great poet Goethe said: "A sincere, active and fruitful friendship is manifested in the consistency of life; it is manifested in that my friend agrees with my goals, and I also agree with his goals, so no matter what our thoughts No matter how different our lifestyles are, we will always move forward together.”

At the same time, when making friends, you must make friends who are better than yourself, so that you can make progress and improvement. Shen Hanguang, a native of the Qing Dynasty, said in "Jingyuan Jinyu": "If you are against someone who is worse than you, you will advance; if you are against someone who is not as good as yourself, you will be retreating. The same is true for making friends." Making friends and playing chess Similarly, if you can play against people who are better than yourself at chess, you will definitely continue to improve yourself.

In a sense, making friends is actually a process of constant mutual selection. A person with noble character, even if he is misunderstood or buried for a while, will eventually win the trust of his friends, because only noble character is priceless and will shine forever. A person with low moral character may be trusted by his friends and regarded as a confidant for a while, but once his misdeeds are exposed, he will be cast aside by his friends. In the past, there was a master who would ask a new apprentice to sweep the floor first and then ask questions. If he asks, "Did you sweep it clean?" and the new apprentice replies, "Sweep it clean." Then ask: "Did it really sweep it clean?" and then answer: "Sweep it really clean." Then he will definitely not accept this new apprentice. . If the answer is just the opposite, then the new apprentice will definitely stay. Why? It turned out that sweeping the floor was an exam question given by this master. He had placed some coins and leaves in the corner beforehand. The purpose is to first test whether the new apprentice can endure hardships and stand hard work, secondly to test whether the new apprentice is attentive and careful, and thirdly to test whether the new apprentice is greedy for money and materials. Only if he passed all three levels would he be willing to accept this apprentice.

This master’s test method is worth learning from. If you want to make close friends, you might as well test your own friends in this way.

Philosophy of Life

It is enough to have a confidant in life, and a confidant is a like-minded person. Only when a common cause connects each other can it be long-lasting and reliable.

Otherwise, even if you become friends, it will be difficult to maintain them. Therefore, to make friends, you must be sincere.

Make Friends