First, treat others with sincerity, blame yourself with a sense of responsibility for others, and forgive others with a sense of forgiveness for yourself. We must be sincere and tolerant towards others, and be self-critical towards ourselves and must correct our mistakes. When interacting with others, how you treat others will be how others treat you. It's like looking in a mirror. Your own expressions and attitudes can be clearly seen in the expressions and attitudes of others towards you. If you treat others with sincerity, others will treat you with sincerity. If you are hostile to others, others will be hostile to you. The most sincere friendship and the most incomprehensible hatred are gradually caused by this "reflection" principle. Therefore, when you want to correct others, you should first correct yourself. You should treat others how you want others to treat you. If you want others to understand you, you must first understand others.

Second, cultivate true friendship. If you can do the first thing, many of your college friends will become your lifelong confidants. On the road of studying and pursuing one's own development together, this kind of friendship is extremely precious. When making friends, don't just look for people who have a similar temperament to you or who will only agree with you. There are many kinds of good friends: optimistic friends, wise friends, down-to-earth friends, humorous friends, friends who inspire you, friends who improve your abilities, friends who help you understand yourself, friends who tell you the truth, etc. . In addition, falling in love in college can also teach you how to take care of others and improve your empathy and self-control. However, when it comes to falling in love, you don't have to fall in love for the sake of falling in love.

Third, learn team spirit and communication skills. The community is a microscopic society, and participating in the community is the best training before entering the society. In the club, you can develop your teamwork and leadership skills, and you can also develop your professional expertise. But more importantly, you should be a sincere service provider and volunteer, or take the initiative to play the role of a communication bridge between classmates and teachers when working as a student, and use this to exercise your communication skills and serve your classmates and teachers. Serve. This kind of learning process will not be easy, and there will definitely be setbacks, but don't be discouraged. Interpersonal communication in university societies is a kind of learning that does not require "paying tuition." If you make a mistake, you can start over.

Fourth, learn from the people around you. In classes and clubs, observe the students around you, especially those students who you think have particularly strong social and communication skills, and see how they get along with others. For example, look at how they deal with conflicts in relationships, how to persuade and influence others, how to use their cooperation and coordination skills, how to express respect and sincerity to others, how to express approval or disapproval, and how to speak without offending others. Full display of personality and so on. Through observation and imitation, you will gradually find that your interpersonal skills will improve unexpectedly. In school, every friend can be your mentor, and their enthusiasm, humor, wit, erudition, integrity, communication, politeness and other qualities can all become your learning objects. At the same time, those people and things you don't like can also sound the alarm for you, warning you not to do those people and things. Of course, you should also generously help every friend and try to be their mentor and role model.

Fifth, improve self-cultivation and personality charm. If you feel that having no specialties or hobbies may become an obstacle to improving your interpersonal skills, then you can consciously choose and cultivate some interests and hobbies. Shared interests and hobbies are also one of the ways for you to build deep relationships with your friends. Many people who have made great achievements in their careers are not bookworms who just study hard behind closed doors. Most of them have their own interests and hobbies. Among my colleagues at Microsoft Research Asia are experts in painting, bridge and sports. Hobbies are not only a way of interpersonal communication, but also allow everyone to explore their potential outside of studying. For example, physical exercise can both unleash your athletic potential and develop your team spirit. If you really have no hobbies, then reading more good books to enrich your knowledge can also improve your interpersonal skills, because nothing can better reflect a person's personality charm than wisdom and profound knowledge.

So, learning to get along with others is also a "compulsory course" in college