When it comes to drinking, almost everyone has had personal experience, and wine culture is also an ancient and fresh topic. Modern people find the function of wine more and more in the process of communication.
Indeed, wine, as a medium of communication, plays a unique role in welcoming guests, seeing them off, making friends, communicating and passing on friendship. Therefore, exploring the mystery on the wine table will help you to communicate successfully.
1, enjoy the whole people, don't whisper.
Most banquets have more guests, so try to talk about topics that most people can participate in and get the approval of most people. Because of different personal hobbies and knowledge, the topic should not be too biased as far as possible, so as not to be dominated by one family, far apart, and talk endlessly, leading to digression and ignoring everyone. Tip-Party Adventure
In particular, try not to whisper to others and give others a sense of mystery, which will often produce a good jealousy for you two and affect the effect of drinking.
2, aim at both sides, grasp the overall situation
Most banquets have a theme, that is, the purpose of drinking. When you go to eat, you should first look at the expressions around you and prioritize. Don't drink for the sake of drinking, and lose a good opportunity to make friends, let alone let some grandstanding drinkers disturb the host's meaning.
3. Appropriate language and humor
Sprinkling it on the table can show a person's talent, common sense, self-cultivation and communication etiquette. Sometimes a humorous language will leave a deep impression on the guests and make people feel good about you invisibly. Therefore, it is very important to know when to say something, to use appropriate language, and to be humorous.
4, moderate persuasion, don't force.
On the wine table, we often encounter the phenomenon of persuading wine. Some people always like to regard the wine field as a battlefield and try their best to persuade others to drink more, thinking that it is unrealistic to drink enough.
A hero can drink wine, a man who drinks too much can, but a man who drinks too little is hard. Sometimes, excessive persuasion will completely destroy the feelings of the original friends.
5. Toast in an orderly way, with clear priorities.
Baking bread is also a science. Generally speaking, a toast should be made in the order of age, position and the status of the guest and the host. Before toasting, we must fully consider the order of toasting and distinguish between primary and secondary. In order to drink with people you don't know, you should first inquire about your identity or pay attention to what others call you so as not to be embarrassed or hurt your feelings.
When toasting, you must grasp the order of toasting. If you want to have a guest at the dinner table, you should be respectful to him, but you should pay attention to the fact that if someone with higher status or older people is present, you should not only be respectful to those who can help you, but also propose a toast to the respected elders first, otherwise everyone will be embarrassed.
6. Read words and understand people's hearts.
If you want to get everyone's appreciation on the wine table, you must learn to read and read. Because when dealing with people, we must understand people's hearts, so that we can play a good role on the wine table.
7, the edge is gradually exposed, sit firmly on Mount Tai.
At the banquet, you should see the occasion clearly, correctly evaluate your own strength, don't be too impulsive, try to keep some alcohol and talk, don't let others underestimate yourself and don't show yourself too much, choose the right time, and gradually radiate your own edge, so that you can sit firmly on Mount Tai, don't give others the idea of this ability, and let everyone dare not underestimate your strength.
Praise the Lord's name before meals and praise the Lord after meals.
Not picky about food is commendable.
Guests who fast may not fast.
Eat nearby and advise people who don't know the etiquette of eating.
It is forbidden to continuously feed dates and other companions into your mouth.
Eat from the edge of the plate, not from the middle.
You can't eat by yourself.
Eat with three fingers
Blow it into a disgusting drink.
It is better to sit down and drink water than to stand and watch.
It is very stressful to be proposed a toast without preparation. The best solution at this time is to say how you feel. Toast never takes long. If you are asked to make a toast unprepared, you can say something simple to get out of trouble, such as "I say hello to Ken, and God bless you." Or "Say hello to our good friend and boss Greta"
But if you want to be more elegant and eloquent, you will want to add some memories, praises and related stories or jokes. However, a toast should be appropriate to the occasion. A sense of humor rarely seems out of place, but at a wedding ... >>
Question 2: What do you mean by three books and six gifts? Three Books and Six Rites are the traditional marriage etiquette in China. "Three Books" refers to the documents used in the process of "Six Rites", including appointment books, ceremony books and welcoming books. "Six Rites" refers to the whole marriage process from marriage proposal to marriage. "Six Rites" means accepting gifts, asking names, concubinage, accepting gifts, inviting parties and welcoming relatives.
Uncle San
"Three Books" are documents used in the process of marriage, which can be said to be an effective written record to ensure marriage in ancient times. It means:
Letter of appointment: namely letter of appointment. When Naji (a man and a woman are engaged), the man's family gives the book to the woman's family.
Gift book: a document used in the ceremony, which lists the items and quantities of the ceremony.
Wedding book: that is, the document to marry the bride. It is the certificate that the man gave to the woman when he came in to greet the bride.
Six rites
"Six Rites" refers to the six rites in the process of marriage:
National electronic advisory Committee
When the children get married, the parents of the man's family ask the matchmaker to propose marriage to the found woman's family. When accepting gifts, the man's family needs to send about 30 kinds of auspicious gifts to the woman's family; The woman's family also asked the matchmaker about the man's family at this time. Marriage customs of ancient Han nationality. It is very popular in many parts of the country. The first of the "Six Rites". The man wants to marry the woman, and the man sends a matchmaker to the woman's house to propose marriage as a gift. After being accepted, please ask the matchmaker to formally accept the bride's "spouse selection ceremony". After preliminary discussion, if the woman is interested, the man sends a matchmaker to formally propose to the woman's family and carries a certain gift, so it is called. Goose is the only gift from Gunnar Chua Li. Acceptance is the beginning of all marriage procedures. The ceremony of accepting gifts in later generations basically follows the weekly system, while gifts have other provisions. "Yili? Scholars are stunned: "When you are stunned, you will receive it. Use geese. " Zheng Xuan's Note: "If you want to marry him, you must first let the media know what you said, and then let him know what he said, and the woman allows it, and then let people accept it." Its gift is a goose. Later generations gradually added gifts. In the Ming Dynasty, Chen Yan and her gifts were in the hall. In Qing Dynasty, Chen Yi, a wedding guest, was invited into the palace, and the book was fatal. The person who presided over the ceremony received the book and sued the guests of the temple. The number of jewels collected by ordinary people is limited to four. [1] Customized at the beginning of Yongzheng, * * * married, more than four items, limited to eight items of silks and satins and ten items of food. Less than five pieces, less than eight pieces, less than two pieces, and four pieces of R wire and fruit boxes for military and civilian use. On the day of the official wedding, the official deacons were used, and 12 people carried lights and drums. Next to the official, there are eight people, with lights and drums. It is forbidden to waste money, and all officials and people are not allowed to use the gift cloud.
Q. Name
That is, after the woman's parents accept the proposal, the woman's family will bring her daughter's age to the man's family, so that men and women are right and good luck will be good. The second ceremony of "Six Rites" in the Western Zhou Dynasty. The ceremony of "asking the name" was first seen in Yili: "Marriage has six ceremonies, namely, accepting the gift, asking the name, taking a concubine, accepting the levy, inviting the party, and welcoming the relatives." He also said: "Ask the name: whoever asks the name will have good or bad luck." Book of rites? Fang Zhu added, "If you ask your name, you ask your mother's surname." When asking names, use geese as gifts. "White Tiger Biography" Volume 4 "Marriage" said: "Take talents, ask names, take luck, invite parties, and greet the wedding with geese. Zheng Na said Xuan Bing, so he didn't need geese. "
After the ceremony, the man asked the matchmaker to ask the woman's name, date and time of birth, so that the man could ask whether he was married and whether it was good or bad. Or think that asking the name is the man's messenger asking the woman's birth mother's surname, so as to distinguish between true and false. The scope of the query after the name extends to family status, position, property, appearance, health and many other aspects. When you ask your name, you must bring a gift, usually a goose. Betel nut is often used as a gift for ethnic minorities in Hainan, Guangdong and southwest China. The woman's wedding card and the man's birthday were divined, and it was confirmed that they could get married before the Naji ceremony.
Marriage etiquette is the second of the six rites. In other words, the man sent a matchmaker to the woman's house to ask her name and birthday. After getting Geng Tie back, Buji folded his character. "Yili? Shi Hunli: "Bin Zhiyan, what's your name? "Master Xu, guest admission." Zheng Xuan's note: "Anyone who asks his name will have good or bad luck." Jia Gong Yan Shu: "If you ask your first name, ask your female surname."
Najib
(also known as Guo): After receiving the Geng Tie, it will be placed in front of the gods or ancestors to ask about good and bad luck, so as to make sure that the characters of the two sides do not conflict. After learning that there are no signs of contradiction between the two sides, they have initially agreed to get married.
Zheng Na
(also called gifts): that is, the man's family gives the letter of appointment and gifts to the woman's family. One month to two weeks before the wedding, the man's family will ask two or four female relatives (must be Quanfu) to make an appointment with the matchmaker and bring the bride price, gift money and dowry to the woman's family; At this point, the woman needs to return the gift. Conscription: Marriage custom of ancient Han nationality. It is very popular in many parts of the country. The fourth ceremony in the "Six Rites". Also known as "South City". That is, Naji, the male family, sends dowry to the female family. Book of rites? A scholar's faint ceremony in Kong Shu said: "Those who collect the levy also receive the money. Sign, into also. Hire money before getting married ... >>
Question 3: Integrity. Observe etiquette. What does quality mean? Wo Jia, syy5896.
Question 4: What does the traditional marriage custom in China mean? The traditional marriage custom in China is three books and six rites. "Three Books" refers to the documents used in the process of "Six Rites", including appointment books, ceremony books and welcoming books. "Six Rites" refers to the whole marriage process from marriage proposal to marriage. "Six Rites" means accepting gifts, asking names, concubinage, accepting gifts, inviting parties and welcoming relatives.
Question 5: Who knows what the "six rites" in traditional weddings mean? The content of six gifts includes six aspects, which are actually six procedures for the establishment of marriage: one is to receive gifts, that is, the man sends bride price to the woman to propose marriage. The second is to ask the name, that is, the man's matchmaker asks the woman's name and date of birth, and then divines good or bad luck in the ancestral hall. Only when the result is good can we proceed to the next step, and the intense one will stop here. The third is Najib, who decided to get married after divination. Fourth, the man sent someone to send the bride price to the woman's house. Fifth, invitation, that is, asking the woman to set a wedding date. Sixth, kiss and greet. On the wedding day, the man must meet the woman in person, and then the man will go back first and meet him outside the door. Every procedure, the man should send a wild goose, because the wild goose is a migratory bird, so it is punctual and trustworthy, the wild goose is faithful, and the widowed one is single. It turns out that officials send lambs, doctors send geese and scholars send pheasants. Later, they were all unified into geese. If you want to send more goods, you can send more when you receive them. Other procedures to send geese are only symbolic. The marriage procedure of Six Rites is very complicated, ordinary people have no time and financial resources to bear, and only officials and nobles strictly abide by it. However, folklore also uses this as a reference to merge some procedures, for example, the first and second can be completed at one time, and the third and fourth can also be merged. The folk wedding customs can still see the influence of the Six Rites in the Western Zhou Dynasty. After receiving the bride from her husband's home according to the "Six Rites", she will hold a formal ceremony of husband and wife ―― paying homage to the bride and getting married are the most important. Worship the church, also known as heaven and earth, the new couple worships God O, seeking the righteousness of human relations, worshipping ancestors, relatives, flowers and candles, and couples, and the woman becomes a member of the man's family. Combination is to divide a jar into two spoonfuls and combine them into a container. Gourd is gourd, and the couple uses it to pour wine and gargle, divide it into two pieces, and connect the handles with thread, which symbolizes that the two will be integrated because of the wedding. Bitter, used to hold wine, the wine becomes bitter, gargle with bitter wine, which means that husband and wife should share joys and sorrows. There are etiquette after marriage, such as the bride meeting her in-laws the next morning and cooking in the kitchen the third day after going through the door. After marriage, the son-in-law will go back to her mother's house with the bride and meet her parents and relatives. This is called Huimen, and she will officially become a female son-in-law.
Question 6: What does the ancient "Three Books and Six Rites" mean? These three books are engagement letter (engagement book), gift book (gift list) and wedding book (wedding book).
Six rites are recorded in the Book of Rites. In fact, this is a traditional wedding ceremony in China (formed in the pre-Qin period), which must go through six procedures, namely: accepting gifts (proposing marriage); Ask the name (clip eight characters); Najib (Guo); Levy (gift); Invitation date (date selection); Propose marriage (welcome marriage)
It is recorded in Yili and the Book of Rites.
Question 7: What does the traditional legal system in China mean? First, the combination of etiquette and law, reasonable ceremony.
Different from western ancient laws and religions, China's ancient legal system was deeply influenced by Confucianism and ethics. Its distinctive feature is to safeguard the moral norms with "three cardinal guides and five permanents" as the core for legislative and judicial purposes, and to require "quasi-respect" of the law. The spirit of courtesy is to respect each other, that is, to maintain the human relations of "father and son are close, monarch and minister are righteous, husband and wife are different, their ages are orderly, and friends are trustworthy". Rites originated from the sacrificial activities and customs of clan society, and the relationship between rites and law has always been the theme of China ancient legal system. A large number of existing documents prove that in the Western Zhou Dynasty, China has entered the era of propriety. Rites of Zhou Dynasty is a complex system containing the principles and rules of behavior of individuals, families, countries and society, in which the "rites" and "faux pas" that regulate the basic system of the state belong to the nature of legal norms. At the beginning of the Western Han Dynasty, the ritual has already begun. When making the etiquette system, Shu absorbed the etiquette system such as pilgrimage. Confucianism in Han dynasty gradually gained its orthodox position in the legal field by breaking the prison with righteousness, interpreting the law and introducing the ritual into the law. The system of "playing the emperor" and the litigation principle of keeping secrets from father and son are widely used. The period of the Three Kingdoms, the Jin Dynasty and the Southern and Northern Dynasties is an important period for the development of China's ancient legal system along the road of combining etiquette and law. According to the principle of "respecting, valuing and being close to each other", Cao Wei initiated the "Eight Opinions" into the law. In the Western Jin Dynasty, the principle of "respecting the old and the young, and distinguishing between relatives and friends" was implemented, which initiated the formulation of punishment according to service. The Northern Wei Dynasty added two items: "raising relatives" and "being an official". In order to emphasize the principles of "loyalty to the monarch" and "filial piety", the Northern Qi Dynasty listed "ten evils" as the first of "famous examples". The Law of Tang Dynasty is a model of feudal code. After the Song Dynasty, all dynasties followed the example of the Tang system, and both legislation and judicature carried out the spirit of "combining etiquette with law" and "respecting etiquette once".
The influence of Confucian ethics on law is all-round, mainly in two aspects: First, the law is full of strong ethical color. The code of ethics is regarded as the guiding ideology of legislation and judicature, and "Li Ming directs the people", "Morality dominates punishment" and "Li Ming teaches" become the basic principles of the legal system. Etiquette norms and various moral norms in national and social life are fixed by law and require all subjects to abide by them. According to the principle of "rudeness leads to punishment", the behavior that violates ethical norms is listed as the object of punishment, so as to ensure that the process of law implementation is itself a process of promoting education and make law a means to realize the goal of moral education. The legal system of past dynasties regards the maintenance of the social hierarchy with the "three cardinal guides and five permanents" as the primary task of the law, among which "the monarch is the minister" ranks first in the three cardinal guides. The law recognizes the supremacy of the monarch and safeguards the dignity, personal safety and power of the monarch in all aspects. The law lists "rebellion", "rebellion", "evil rebellion", "immorality", "disrespect", "unfilial", "injustice" and "civil strife" which seriously endanger the relationship between monarchy and human relations as "ten evils" and often pardons them. The law recognizes that people with different identities have different legal status, and a few powerful people enjoy privileges such as "discussion", "invitation", "reduction", "exemption", "official position" and "redemption". Confirm the ethical relationship within the family with patriarchal power and husband power as the core, and confirm the difference between good and bad. People with different identities commit crimes and the punishment is equal. Rulers elevate all the moral norms they think are important to the height of law, and list all the behaviors they think violate ethics as punishment objects, thus achieving a high degree of combination of etiquette and law.
Second, the spirit of benevolence, forgiveness, cautious punishment and gracious punishment has been implemented in legislation and justice. "Benevolence" is the core of Confucian philosophy and the important content and requirement of ethics. Affected by the principle of benevolence and forgiveness, the law stipulates that the punishment for crimes committed by the elderly, children and pregnant women should be mitigated or exempted, which is called "three verticals". The mitigation of punishment for ignorance, forgetfulness and negligence is called "three mistakes". Those who are known to repent and turn themselves in, and "consciously promote officials" because of official mistakes, are also given commutation or exemption. The laws of past dynasties have also stipulated many measures to show mercy to prisoners. For example, judges are not allowed to interrogate illegally, and offenders sit idly by. In prison management, it is stipulated that prisoners should not be maltreated, that their families should give them meals, that they should be given clothes if they are not enough, that they should be treated if they are sick, that they should be shackled if they are seriously ill, and that judges who mistreat prisoners should be held accountable, and so on. The ancient legal system not only maintained moral norms and hierarchical system, but also embodied some positive humanitarian spirit.
Second, people-oriented, restraining the strong and helping the weak.
Compared with other legal systems with a long history in the world, an outstanding feature of ancient Chinese law is that it regards law as an artificial normative system. & gt