As a friend, you should learn to listen. When your friend encounters setbacks and troubles, he will find someone to vent his emotions. As a friend, you can listen to each other sincerely and patiently, which opens an emotional outlet for your friend.
When a friend tells you something, you should not only listen patiently, but also insert one or two words of emotional comfort from time to time, or give your friend some ideas and methods, so that his feelings will get out of the swamp, and he will feel that having a friend like you is the real reliance, and his feelings will be deeper and his friendship will increase day by day.
2. Friends should also be separated.
Although friends are the friendliest or most reliable communication objects in social circles, they have complicated human nature. When communicating with friends, you should also think carefully and make friends carefully. According to the laws of nature, people who become friends have a lot of fun. Like-minded, some like-minded, some have similar educational level, and some have lofty personality. Telepathy and so on.
No matter what the reason is, friends, after contact for a period of time, should have a choice, should have relatives and friends. For example, some friends are sincere and pure, and naturally they can be sincere and caring; However, some of them are invested in you for some utilitarian purpose. Once the benefits are not achieved or you are too poor to be useful to him, he will leave you Such friends can't be close. What's more, it is better to keep a certain distance.
3, asking for human feelings is enough.
However, people can never ask for more. You ask for help once, and people help you. If you don't know much, you will push your luck again and again. Then, friends will be bored and disgusted with people like you, and the relationship between friends will be unsustainable. Others don't consider each other's tolerance. In order to meet their own needs, they engage in friendship coercion, which is also an act that makes friends disgusted.
4. Show up when friends need it most.
Facing the mixed society and changeable nature, no one can guarantee that everything will be fine, Dont Ask For Help, and no one boasts that he will never be in danger. Therefore, people are always eager for help when they encounter difficulties. Therefore, as a friend, when others need your help, you must show up in time and sincerely reach out to help your friend and help him tide over the difficulties. As long as you grasp this principle of communication, your friendship with friends will increase day by day.
5. There must be a "degree" in communication.
China has a very philosophical saying that "extremes meet". In life, anything that goes too far will go to the opposite side. The same is true of communication between friends. The past is very close and prone to cracks. Only by grasping a moderate degree can the friendship between friends become eternal.
Everyone's culture, morality, personality, attitude towards life, work potential and family situation are different. The size of this difference is sometimes proportional to the frequency of communication between friends, that is, the more frequent communication, the greater the pull, and the communication between friends, whether it is the number of times to get along or the distance. , we must keep separate, in order to achieve "the meaning is still unfinished, and the feeling is still unfinished."
6. Don't idealize your friends.
There are no two identical leaves in the world. Although friends have similar temperaments, similar interests and congenial temperaments, a friend is a living person after all, and there will always be some differences, shortcomings and secrets you don't want others to know. Therefore, when communicating with friends, don't idealize your friends, and don't take "I" as a reference for all your words and deeds.
First of all, you should tolerate your friend's shortcomings. Therefore, once we find his shortcomings, we should tolerate them generously, choose the right time and method, and sincerely help him overcome them. Secondly, let friends keep themselves. When you communicate with your friends, you can't insist that your friends must be your "copies". Let friends have their own hobbies and personalities. Don't let your friends report everything to you. It seems that friends who don't talk to you about things are unfaithful to you, not friends. If you are so overbearing and demand your friends with such idealized standards, your friends will also resent you.
7. Grasp friendship and love correctly.
Besides love, there should also be a place for friendship between men and women. There are gender differences between men and women. As long as we pay attention to discretion, we can establish a healthy, elegant and pure friendship.
This requires the existence of friendship between male and female colleagues and between male and female classmates. This requires men and women to grasp the relationship between friendship and love; First, men have offended women's dignity and should respect the personality of female compatriots; Second, both men and women should recognize the difference between friendship and love. Friendship is only a friendly exchange between men and women, and love has certain responsibilities to each other, such as family and marriage, which is specific and binding.
There is an insurmountable gap between friendship and love, which can be developed in friendship without crossing the line. If one or both parties cross the line, there will be feelings between men and women and they will enter the stage of love, but once they change back to friendship due to some internal and external factors, they will become "different" friendships.
8. Friends should also say "no".
It is legitimate for friends to always ask for something, and some people often ask for something beyond the scope of principle and objective reality. For example, some friends entrust you with things beyond your master's ability, and there is nothing you can do; Some friends entrust you with something against your subjective will, and so on. If you encounter such a situation, as a friend, you should say "no" decisively.
First of all, you have done a lot of things against your principles. Once you are caught, you and your friends will become prisoners or lawbreakers. Secondly, you can't do things beyond your ability. If you don't explain the situation and refuse, it will hurt your friendship because you didn't do it. Thirdly, if you don't refuse something against your will, it will affect your mood of making friends with you, and it will also hinder you from paying attention to the ways and means when entrusting friends, and you can't be blunt and rash.
Common methods; First, you can patiently dissuade and state your interests; Second, you can explain the situation solidly and let your friends understand your difficulties; The third is to make a detour, handle it tactfully, and skillfully use other methods to help complete the things entrusted by friends.