I remember someone once said that marriage is never as simple as 1+ 1=2, nor is it a simple combination of two people. But 0.5+0.5= 1, that is to say, two people remove half of their personalities, and then form a complete 1. Marriage is not to possess each other, but to accompany each other.

Getting married is the most difficult thing in the world, and it is also a very simple thing. Suffering is that couples will face a dull life and many unexpected hardships; The simple thing is that as long as the husband and wife have a good emotional foundation and know how to manage marriage, it is easy to get happiness.

In marriage, couples will face all kinds of problems and frictions, and they will also face the influence of all kinds of people on their marriage. Among them, the family conflicts caused by family of origin members have the deepest influence on the marriage of husband and wife.

Originally, because of blood relationship, many things will become unclear. Many contradictions are extremely difficult to solve. Because the palm of your hand is covered with meat, you feel sorry for each other. Therefore, many marital conflicts caused by family members can't be started at all, which can only make the contradictions deeper and deeper.

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In fact, in marriage, such as the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the tension between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law seems to have become commonplace. Because it's easy to hear or see this happen. This is also the first time that we know the real case of family of origin's destruction of marriage.

But some things that happen in real life are often worse than we know. With the development of the Internet, many unknown people and things spread through the Internet, letting us know that the world is really full of wonders.

What we are going to discuss today is the influence of brother-in-law on marriage. Many people know what brother-in-law means. It is the younger brother of the woman's husband. So how did he affect his marriage?

It's actually quite simple. Just remember one thing: if any family member has no sense of boundary to the "small family" composed of husband and wife, there will be contradictions, which will affect marriage.

Many brother-in-law's influence on his brother's marriage is due to his lack of sense of boundaries. And a series of things happened, sometimes people feel angry, sometimes people feel ridiculous.

I wrote this article because of the contribution of reader Xiao Lu. She told me how her good brother-in-law pushed her marriage to the wall step by step.

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Lu Xiao is 30 years old. She and her husband Abin have been married for almost five years, and have a daughter who is almost three years old. The relationship between husband and wife was good, but because of Abin's family, the relationship between husband and wife has become very weak now, and the marriage is on the verge of breaking up.

It was none other than Abin's younger brother and Lu Xiao's brother-in-law who ruined their marriage. This brother-in-law is great enough to do this.

Abin's parents are farmers, and they gave birth to these two sons. Abin is the eldest, and his younger brother is six years younger than him.

People who have many children at home will know that the younger the child, the more likely it is to be loved by parents. Brother-in-law was spoiled by his parents since childhood and grew up with the tolerance of his parents and Abin.

As the saying goes, a loving mother often loses her son. This sentence is very reasonable. Because of the doting and connivance of his parents, his brother-in-law was arrogant from an early age and developed a bad habit of being lazy.

When Abin got married, his brother-in-law stopped studying and stayed at home. I only play with my mobile phone all day and never want to find a job. I depend entirely on my parents and brother to support myself.

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When Lu Xiaogang and Abin got married, she was more concerned about her brother-in-law, because she felt that since he was married to their family, he should be more concerned about him. Therefore, Lu Xiao kindly introduced several jobs to his brother-in-law, but none of them worked there for more than a month.

Lu Xiao always helps him clean up the mess and apologizes to others. In the end, Lu Xiao also understood that his brother-in-law just couldn't help whitewash the wall, so he left him alone.

Lu Xiao didn't live with her in-laws after she got married. She and Abin bought a building in the county, and have been working in the city, and their life is ok.

However, my brother-in-law saw that the county was bustling and fun, and he met a group of friends who were all in the county. He told Abin that he wanted to live at home for a while, and Abin directly agreed.

When Lu Xiao knew about this, his brother-in-law had moved in. To this end, Lu Xiao and Abin repeatedly complained that it was inconvenient for her brother-in-law to move in. But Abin always said that she made a mountain out of a molehill and it was inconvenient for her brother to live in it.

My brother-in-law started fooling around with friends and always went to some Internet cafes and bars on weekdays. Sometimes he will spend the night outside. When his brother-in-law came to the city, he didn't want to go back to the countryside.

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Once in the city, the cost is much higher. Brother-in-law spends a lot of money, often asking his parents for money, and even asking Abin for money. Abin always gives his brother-in-law money secretly. Lu Xiao was very angry when he found out.

Because they still have a mortgage to pay, they have to give their brother-in-law money to spend. How dare he be raised by his brother and sister-in-law as a big man?

But my brother-in-law is not ashamed at all, but takes it for granted. In order to play games, he pestered Abin to buy him a computer, and then played games day and night.

Lu Xiao couldn't stand her brother-in-law's interference in her life, so she discussed with Abin and asked him to send her brother back to his hometown. However, Abin felt that he was not sensible and looked down on his brother. On the contrary, she and Lu Xiao had a big fight.

Especially when Lu Xiao was pregnant, she kept washing and cooking for her brother-in-law. Abin is also a shopkeeper of cutting after returning home, regardless of Lu Xiao. During that time, Lu Xiao was very painful and once thought about divorce.

After the birth of my daughter, the family became crowded. My brother-in-law also decided to leave, because he and a friend wanted to share a room, and they also found a job. Lu Xiao thinks that her brother-in-law is open-minded, and she is very happy.

In this way, brother-in-law moved out, and Lu Xiao thought nothing but happiness.

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After a year or so, there has been no news of my brother-in-law. Abin contacted him, and he said that he had a good life and was ready to make money. Abin is also very happy that his younger brother is suddenly sensible.

But not long after, my brother-in-law ran back to his hometown in the countryside and confessed what he had done over the past year in front of his parents.

It turns out that my brother-in-law and friends went out to share a room, and instead of looking for a job, they played games together in the rental house. They spent all their money quickly. They were lazy. Brother-in-law wanted to ask his parents for money, but after all, it was embarrassing to chew off his money in front of his friends, so they worked together to find a way.

Brother-in-law's friends don't know where they heard that online gambling can make money. So they really gambled with what little money they had. Unexpectedly, they really won the money. They were very happy and felt that they had found the opportunity to make money.

As we all know, ten bets and nine losses. It wasn't long before they lost a lot of money. By that time, the brother-in-law was blind, and he borrowed usury to gamble. This year, back and forth about lost nearly two hundred thousand!

When there was no money to borrow, my brother-in-law woke up. When he saw that he had made a mistake and owed so much money, he panicked and went home to confess to his parents.

But with so much money, Abin's parents don't have so much at all. In desperation, let the younger son go to Abin to find a way.

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Brother-in-law is afraid to find Abin. He knew that if he told Abin that he owed so much money, he would be scolded. So he thought he was smart enough to ask Lu Xiao for money.

In the face of Lu Xiao, he acted very hard. He directly asked Lu Xiao for 200,000 yuan. Lu Xiao got a fright. She didn't have that much money, so she refused.

But my brother-in-law said confidently, "How can you have no money? My family gave you 80 thousand bride price at the beginning. You have been making money all these years, but there are hundreds of thousands. Give it to me! "

Xiao Lu was also angry and said, "I have no money, even if I have money, why should I give it to you?" This is my money! "

My brother-in-law even said, "When you marry into my family, you are a family. It is natural to help me. "

Lu Xiao had never seen such a shameless person, so she angrily scolded her brother-in-law and ran away. This matter is not over yet. Abin knew about his younger brother, and even secretly gave his brother his savings to pay off his debts. Xiao Lu went on the rampage after knowing this, and asked Abin why he did it. Unexpectedly, Abin said, "That's my brother. I should help him. You should also be sensible. "

Lu Xiao had a big fight with him and almost didn't get divorced. Finally, for the sake of children, Lu Xiao chose patience.

In fact, many times, the reason why family of origin members will affect the marriage of husband and wife is also because of the indulgence of one of the husband and wife.

I don't know that conniving at them is tantamount to pushing their marriage off the cliff with my own hands. Such people are also extremely stupid.