In the past few days, you can see on Chinese websites at home and abroad news that an aunt was thrown feces on her while dancing, and that a man in Beijing was bothered by square dancing and fired a shotgun at a Tibetan mastiff. And some aunts who danced square dances regardless of other people's study and rest, accused them of asking why they didn't install soundproof glass.

Auntie’s square dance has become a public nuisance that disturbs the people. Can the children of the aunties put some effort into persuading them to go back in a peaceful manner? Regarding this proposal, a friend of mine said on Weibo: "My children can't be persuaded to go back. What's the point of letting a generation of people who don't study go home? They can only watch short-term blind date mediation programs on TV, and they won't be alone at all. Return." The old couple stared at each other for two days before they came out again. "

China's society is getting older. What should people do when they get older? According to Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, in addition to physical exercise, dancing also satisfies other needs, such as a sense of belonging. Unlike most office workers who jump around today, the older generation are mostly "worker people" and instinctively feel that they need to belong to a group, to be noticed, needed, and cared for.

Since I live in two "countries", I can't help but make another comparison, just as a reference. It should be noted that both China and the United States have elderly problems, and some of my statements are just broad-brush summaries for narrative convenience.

In the United States, it is said that the elderly and their children do not live together, and the land is vast and sparsely populated, so they should be more lonely. But why don't we have these problems? The saying that the United States is "a paradise for children and a hell for the elderly" is mostly spread among the Chinese. This is because many elderly people have these problems because they have difficulty in transportation and language barriers. Most of the local elderly people seem to be enjoying themselves, and even say that they are "young people at heart". There are also some communities and apartments (commonly known as senior apartments) designed for the elderly to live in. It is said that residents must be over 65 years old.

I found that older people in the United States retire later, which has alleviated the problem of loneliness to a great extent. Many older Americans keep working until they can’t do it anymore. There is no concept of "work unit" in the United States. After retiring from one place, he continues to work in another place, including going to Wal-Mart to do chores. The wages of these post-retirement jobs may not be high, but they always give him something to do. Retirement is too early in China, with some retiring in their early 50s. If you live to be 80, you will still have 30 years of leisure at home. If you have the chance, you should find something else to do. This is not just a matter of money. Being able to contribute to others is a beautiful feeling and makes people feel fulfilled while they are alive. If there are no job opportunities, volunteering is a good idea.

Nowadays, many elderly people think about how to maintain fitness all day long. If a person always lives around himself, he will become smaller and smaller and become more and more depressed.

Making community life rich and colorful should be the only way for an aging society. American community life is very developed. Many middle-aged and elderly people go to church to study the Bible on Wednesdays and worship on Sundays. There may also be other group study opportunities, which satisfies a deep need for community belonging. In addition to religious institutions, there are also a variety of other community projects. For example, there are many clubs that I have visited, such as the "Women's Club", "Poetry Club" and so on. If China also organizes such community centers (even if they are for-profit and let everyone pay membership fees), or if the existing community centers are really used, it will also solve the problem that middle-aged and elderly people cannot find a "third party" after they leave their work and families. "location" issue.

After writing this, some elderly friends may also ask: Will you one day not grow old? I think it is not good for people to get sick and weak when they are old, and I don't look forward to it, but I like to write, write and translate, and no one will bother me. I don't want to worry about being bored when I get old. In fact, you should develop some hobbies in your old age. After all, you need to spend a lot of time alone in your later years. At this time, it is good to pick up the ideals of the past. For example, the Irish writer McCourt found that he had time after retirement and began to create. In his later years, he wrote many influential books, such as "Angel" "The Ashes of Ra", "The Teacher", etc.

Not everyone has this talent, but there are also many practical things to do. For example, I have an old colleague who spent a lot of time organizing family videos. She organized family photos and then dubbed them into various stories. She played them at family gatherings and was very popular with the extended family. Then they were burned into DVDs and distributed to families. For these films, she even traveled far away to take photos of her ancestors' tombstones, and was very busy all day long.

I also know an old man who began to learn to be a carpenter in his old age and built a lot of furniture for his children, grandchildren and relatives. Then he started buying machines and learning how to make pens. Last time we went there, he even gave us several pens as gifts. After all the gifts were delivered, he began to learn to grow vegetables at home. In short, it is through learning to fight aging.

There are also some elderly people who come and go to learn things and cultivate their sentiments. I have seen some elderly people start learning vocal music and piano. According to conventional thinking, everyone thinks that learning is useful for children, so they force children to learn piano and painting when their cognitive load is heaviest, which makes them complain. Speaking of their original intention, most parents do not want their children to become famous and start a family, but just to cultivate their sentiments. When I reach the middle-aged and elderly stage, I have no sentiments anymore, so why not cultivate them? There are so many things that middle-aged and elderly people can learn. Of course, they should not study medicine haphazardly.

Good family relationships should be able to solve the problem of loneliness and boredom in the elderly. Those retired aunts who dance in the square may have an empty nest and feel that they are no longer needed by their children. They are very lost and need to find a way to prove their existence. You may also know about Chinese-style marriages. There are many people who ignore each other and argue. There is not much spiritual comfort at home. Dancing in the square is not bad. Some become helicopter parents, hovering over their children. Interfering in their lives, forcing their children to talk about marriage, rushing to have grandchildren, or directly reaching out to manipulate small families and fighting a proxy war are all signs that there is not much to do.

If husbands please and appreciate each other, who would want to run outside all day long? If you always run out and go dancing, you may not be able to solve family problems and may cause problems? I used to be