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Experts tell me how to strike up a conversation with a stranger. I’m going to Shanghai! I'm a boy

Experts tell me how to strike up a conversation with strangers. I’m going to Shanghai! I'm a boy

Just go by your feelings and others will be offended if you are too purposeful! When talking to others, smile a lot and be polite. When communicating, look at the other person's attitude towards you. If you feel like you can have a long chat with him, go for it. If he seems a little absent-minded, forget it! Personally, I think personality is very important when it comes to making friends! In general, making friends depends on your personality: eloquence, etiquette, expressions, personality, eyes, topics, humor. Enthusiasm and generosity. How to strike up a conversation with a stranger?

Just drink and chat with each other casually

The key to striking up a conversation is to be sincere, relaxed and confident.

The most important thing is: the two of them must make friends because of this.

Only two people chatted together. They found the chat interesting and relaxed. They both wanted to be friends with each other, so it was a good chat.

If you like the other person, strike up a conversation, and date more, you may become a couple.

If it were me: I would take the initiative to say hello to others. . HI, I often meet you and pass by. I live around here. What is my name? Can I be your friend? It's like this, I don't have many friends here, and I really want to make more friends. . Or maybe it's even simpler. . I'm not very familiar with this place, what can I ask? . Thank you. . I live near here too, do you too? Can I come and play with you next time? How about we be friends. . In fact, how to say it is not the point. . But you did this action. . real. . Sometimes it's like this. . Maybe he ignores you, but it doesn't matter. . You can still talk to her next time you meet, and have a casual chat. . Smile. . That's enough... . . It’s okay to say no once. . Every time you try, you will succeed

How do you strike up a conversation with a stranger?

Tip 1: Match the other person’s emotions

Before opening your mouth, sample the voice of the person you are talking to to test his or her emotional state. Start by mentally analyzing the voice sample you obtained to see if the person is happy, depressed, or grumpy. If you want others to listen to your ideas, you must first match their mood and tone, maybe just for a moment.

You must have had this experience. When attending a party or banquet, someone introduces you to a new friend. You shook hands as usual and made eye contact... Then, your learned and rich stomach suddenly became empty, and the operation of your brain also "squeaked" to an emergency stop. You desperately try to squeeze out some interesting topic to fill the awkward silence. But no matter how hard you try, it's still in vain, so your new friend ran away quickly.

We all hope that the first words we speak will make people feel witty, wise and meaningful. We also hope that the people listening will immediately appreciate our wit. Yet the point of the chat is not the specific facts or the wording, but its musicality, its melody. The purpose of chatting is to make people relax, and the sounds we make from our mouths must have a soothing effect, like a cat's "meow", a child's "hum", or a hymn. Therefore, the first thing to do when talking is to match the other person's mood.

When a master communicator talks to others, he will grasp the personality of the object and match it, just like singing to the music of the music teacher. If you want to successfully start a conversation, the first step is to match the other person's emotions, at least in the first one or two sentences. When chatting, you have to remember that music is music, not words. Is the other party's tempo fast or slow? Follow his beat. This is what I mean by matching the other person's emotions.

Tip 2: Passionate flat movement

Are you worried that you don’t know what to say at the beginning? Don't be afraid, 80% of people's impressions of you have nothing to do with what you say, and it almost doesn't matter what you say in your opening remarks. No matter how flat the content is, as long as you say it with a normal heart, a positive attitude, and enthusiasm, it will be easy to attract people.

Tip Three: Taboo: Naked City

Every time you are asked this archaeological question, "Where are you from?" Never answer in just a few words. It's unfair to challenge the other person's imagination in this way. Do your homework first, see what interesting things or features there are in your hometown, and provide clues to the other party so that the conversation between the two people will not be interrupted.

By the time the bait you throw gets a playful and witty response from the other party, you have already left a good impression on the other party as someone who is good at conversation.

You wouldn’t be stupid enough to talk to a stranger naked, would you? In the same way, I hope that when you encounter two questions that must be answered when talking to strangers, the answers you speak will not be too smooth and the other party cannot extend their explanations. These two questions are "Where are you from?" and " Where are you employed?"

When most people are asked these two questions, they answer it as if they were throwing a cold steak on someone else's plate and saying a geographical name. or job title, and then just shut up and call it a day.

You are talking now. Of course, people who meet you will ask, "Where are you from?" If you give him a short city name, without embellishment, "Oh, I am from Cangzhou City, Hebei Province" (or some people they have never heard of) I have never heard of it), the other party may not be able to elicit any response other than a blank stare. Unless the other party is a professor of Chinese geography, there is no better way than to rush to find a topic. If I just say that I am from Changsha every time, what reaction can I expect from others? "Eh, nice place."

So, remember to follow human nature and do yourself a favor. Remember, don't answer this question in just one sentence. When answering the question "Where are you from?" put some gas in the other person's tank and some grain in the feed trough. At least provide some material for the other person to chew on so that the conversation can continue. Just add one or two more sentences about or about the city where you live—tell us about your experiences and observations—so that the other person can enter into the conversation.

Tip 4: Taboo: Glossy titles

"Where do you work?" When this must-have question appears, you may think, "I am a doctor", "Teacher" Answers like ", "engineer" are enough to trigger a conversation between the sexes. But to a person who is not a doctor, teacher, or engineer, what you say is meaningless words, just like a pen without ink. You have to enrich your content so that the listeners have something to chew on in their minds. Otherwise, the other person will quickly quit and it would be more fun to go get a cup of coffee.

New friends often ask, "Where do you thrive?" (We'll discuss whether this is an appropriate question to ask later.) Now, let's take a look at some letting go techniques that can help you When answering this question, maintain the image of a great person.

First of all, just like in the naked city, when a stranger asks this breathtaking question, never throw out an answer casually. If you just say a title: "I am an actuary, I am a lawyer, I am a writer, I am a physicist...", when the other party hears this, they will be like a tortoise flopping over on the floor and struggling to turn. helpless. Please be merciful and they won't act like a stupid layman and ask, "What kind of actuarial science/writing/physics do you do?"

If you are a lawyer, just Don't let the average person try to figure out what you're doing. Add some spice and tell a short story about work so that the other person can understand it immediately. For example, if you're talking to a young mother, you could say, "I'm a lawyer, and our firm specializes in employment law. I recently had a case where a female employee took additional maternity leave because of medical necessity. , but ended up being fired from the company. "Of course mothers understand this.

What if the other party is an entrepreneur? "I'm a lawyer, and our firm specializes in labor law. I recently had a case where a business owner was sued by an employee, accusing her of asking personal questions during a face-to-face interview." Of course, bosses can also respond quickly.

Tip 5: Taboo: Smooth introduction

If two people introducing strangers know each other, do not throw the fishing rod, forget to lay the bait, and then stand aside , smiling like a big fool. The two strangers were so anxious that they didn't know where to start. You can arrange some topics so that two people can talk freely. Once the mission is complete, it's up to you whether you want to stay and join in or find another place to foster relationships.

Starting from the second part so far, we have introduced 5 techniques. The first two techniques can enhance your personality charm, and the last three techniques can open the door to dialogue, resolve embarrassment, and keep the conversation going. Go down. Now, we’re going to take it to the next level and elevate small talk to meaningful communication. This next tip is guaranteed to keep your subject engrossed in your conversation.

Tip 6: Language Detective

Learn from the detectives who handle cases and listen carefully to what the other party says. Every word may be a topic of interest to the other party. Clues are sure to jump out. Seize the opportunity and get to the point neatly. In this way, you can be like Sherlock Holmes and find topics that will make the other person excited.

Know that when you are talking to someone, you should not ask, "Did you enjoy this conversation?" It's just that you may be asking this question in your mind. To be honest, every one of us has this question. In fact, as long as you use the following tips, you can sit back and relax. Detective Sherlock Holmes uses his magnifying glass to carefully examine every link, so no matter how small or difficult to find the clues, he can quickly find them. A natural winner in life is like an infallible detective who can grasp the smallest clues and find the appropriate topic. How did they do it? It all depends on this technique.

Many communication experts know that every thought must have a reason. As long as the other party speaks out, you must know how to follow up. When talking to anyone, remember to open your ears and look for clues like a detective. Pay careful attention to any unusual words the other person mentions: any off-topic places, times, names. Just ask questions in this direction, because these are what the other person likes to talk about.

Now that you have stimulated the desire to talk, let’s take a closer look at how to make the conversation wonderful and exciting.

Tip 7: Rotating Spotlight

When you first meet someone, imagine there is a giant rotating spotlight between you. When you simplify, the spotlight shines on you. As soon as the new friend opens his mouth, the light shines on him. If the spotlight is strong enough, the other person will lose sight of the fact that you have barely talked about yourself. The shorter the spotlight is on you, the more interesting you will be to the other person.

I have a friend who uses this trick very well. He told me: "Every time I meet people and ask them about their lives, I always learn something. So I always turn the spotlight to others. On the body." This is the style of a truly confident person. They know that listening is more rewarding than speaking. Apparently, they are also very capable of winning over the speaker.

One time I was chatting with my friend, Deng Ting. She is a sales executive who specializes in training outstanding sales personnel. She told the salesperson that the huge spotlight shining on the products is not as useful as shining on the customers. The moment the salesperson successfully shines the spotlight on the customer, the business may be closed. Remember, don’t shine your rotating spotlight on yourself. It can occasionally shine on the product, but most of the light should be aimed at your buyers. This is more useful than trying to sell yourself or your product.

Tip 8: Parrot the words

From now on you will never be at a loss for words. Like a parrot, you can repeat the last words of your conversation partner. In this way, it's like playing tennis. The ball representing the right to speak bounces back to him, and you just need to listen easily.

Of course, there are times when even the best communicators hit a wall. Some people speak with no cadence at all, and have no idea what they are mumbling. Even experts who are proficient in language skills cannot find the topic.

If you feel that the conversation between two people is like a fire with only ashes and you can’t fan it (and you want to continue the conversation for political reasons or compassion), here is a trick: It can make the fire of conversation burn brightly again. Even a fool can do it. It is called parroting. Because beautiful tropical birds like the valet can fascinate people just by repeating what others say.

During the conversation, a ball kept bouncing back and forth. First you talk, then the other person talks, then you talk again... just touch in alternating order. Every time, through nods, smiles, gestures, expressions, or various answers, the other party knows that the ball is in your court again. These are your signals, telling him, "I'm going to hit this ball," and that's the rhythm of the conversation.

Let’s go back to that familiar yet fearful moment. Every time it’s your turn to speak, your mind goes blank. Don’t worry. This time, you don’t have to tell the other person with words or actions, “I’ll fight this.” "Ball", just repeat the last two or three words he said, like a parrot, but say it with emotion, like asking a question, and then pass the ball back to the opponent's area.

Tip 9: Wonderful!

The most beautiful sound to a performer's ears is the roar of "Wonderful, wonderful, let's hear it again!" from the enthusiastic applause of the audience. For your conversation object, it comes from your mouth. The most beautiful sound is to say in front of a group of people, "Just like that time they said you..."

Every time you go to a gathering or a party and are with someone important, think about him/her What story have I told you? Choose an appropriate story that you think your audience will appreciate. Then put the spotlight on him and ask him to give a wonderful performance.

At a friend's gathering, I invited Zhou Wei to introduce him to everyone. "Zhou Wei, tell everyone how you defeated your competitors and achieved the target that time. I guess everyone would like to hear about your heroic deeds." Wow~~~ I feel like a magician, Zhou Wei's tongue suddenly seemed to be several times more flexible, and he kept talking about the experience with everyone in a fluent voice... Then I followed the same example, and the party was very successful.

But one thing to note: Make sure the story you ask for can make the person telling it shine. No one wants a repeat of how they lost their business, crashed their car, or got into trouble and ended up in jail. The wonderful performance you ask them to do must make the speaker a big winner, not a mess.

The next tip is about sharing positive stories from your life.

Tip 10: Promote good and hide evil

When you first meet someone, lock up your secret cabinet temporarily and discuss your flaws later. You and your new friend can wait until the relationship is deeper before you share your scandal and laugh about it together. However, at this time, it is necessary to promote good and hide evil.

Many people believe that if you know someone, you will like and should share some little secrets with them, talk about your private affairs, or confess your past shortcomings. After all, no one is a saint. Reveal your scandals. - Like bedwetting, teeth grinding as a child, or some current minor problems - should be able to bring you closer to others.

It depends on the situation, sometimes it is possible. A study shows that if someone has a higher status than you, he or she can make you feel closer to him by revealing some of his weaknesses. U.S. presidential candidate Stevenson had a hole in his pants, but it made the country famous. President Bush got the nation talking when he admitted he was afraid of eating cauliflower.

If your position is very stable, for example, a superstar wants to make friends with fans, you might as well talk about the time when you were so poor that you had no food to eat. If you're not a superstar, it's better to take a conservative approach and take your time to reveal your flaws. People who don't know you well enough may form wrong impressions of you. Your new friend hasn't had time to understand that you are being kind and generous in sharing your thoughts with him.

In this section, you have learned how to get to know people and chat with them. Are you ready to enter another level? Let’s go now! How to chat with strangers on QQ?

Hello buddy, my name is Yixing, and I am happy to answer your questions.

If you strike up a conversation with a stranger on QQ, you can say that the first few minutes of interaction are a battlefield. These few minutes are very important for you to be able to build a fun, comfortable interaction.

Many buddies like to send "Hello" or "I want to get to know you, can we chat" as the first message, but this is not effective.

First of all, from a psychological point of view, "Hello" is a way of chatting with strangers. If at the beginning of the chat, we try our best to subconsciously instill a feeling in girls that we are friends, it will inevitably It will promote the development of you and this girl, so try not to use "Hello" as the first text message that can make the girl feel like you are a stranger.

Why don’t you send a message like “I want to get to know you, can we chat” in the first place?

First of all, let’s put ourselves in someone else’s shoes. When a girl receives a text message like this from you, Whether she wants to consider whether to talk to you or not, the initiative is in the hands of the girl.

Secondly, if you are a girl with high scores and high quality, she will receive similar words countless times every day. If you send the sentence "I want to get to know you, can we chat", the girl will automatically You are classified as an unattractive man, because the way a truly attractive man speaks is not like this. Wouldn't it be better for us to enter the conversation directly at the beginning, and don't we have to chat whether we ask or not?

——So what’s the best way to start? ————

You can say:

"You also use WeChat, I just added your mobile phone number a few days ago"

"Avatar Is it you? I think I’ve seen you before.”, 80% of girls will reply to you: “Ah, where have you seen me?”

Oops, old classmate, long time no see, you’ve been there lately. How about it (she may look at your information when you say this, so don’t put your household registration book with your information)

If you still don’t understand anything, you can continue to ask me. I am Yi Xing Xing, who has been engaged in research on sexual attraction for many years, I believe I can help you. How to strike up a conversation with a stranger on QQ

Hehe~00~ ..... Just say to him online... Hi... Hello! How are you lately? Just say that you added me accidentally When I went to her QQ, I deliberately asked her what she was doing. Did she still study? Where did she study? It was all fine. Why not? Just say you want to make friends with her. What's the point of being embarrassed? Be brave~~ How to strike up a conversation with a stranger, please give me some tips

Go up there shamelessly, but the key is your appearance. How to strike up a conversation with a stranger?

First of all, you need to make him feel approachable and enthusiastic

You can first notice his bags, clothes, etc. to start the conversation

Where did you buy this dress? It seems to be the same as one of my colleagues. I also said it is ugly

Why does it look so beautiful on you, haha

< p> If you want to develop with them

Next, you can be very straightforward and add a bit of humor to say that I went to Baidu to check it out in order to chat with you!

Let’s learn how to draw a gourd, right?

Good luck how to strike up a conversation with a stranger

In fact, there is not much difference in conversation between strangers and familiar people

But there are two things I I think there are differences

1. Strangers give people a sense of mystery. In order to show your strength, you always try to find ways to speak more perfectly, but you are always contradictory, so you Causing not knowing what to say, or not knowing how to say it. This is the general psychology of a person meeting a stranger, but if you want to get to know this stranger, you can talk to him like someone you are familiar with, and talk about things like fun or work.

As long as the topic is not rigid, you can talk about it. Of course, it doesn’t have to be you who speaks every time. You can also use the method of trial questions to raise some topics, so that you can generate more excitement. This does not achieve the best of both worlds.

2. If you talk to familiar people too much, you will run out of things to say. For example, between a husband and wife, it is impossible to talk like a fly flying every time. This is because you know each other too well. Once you are familiar with everything about the other person, there is nothing that you cannot talk about together, including your own health, diet, daily life, etc. But why do you have times when you have nothing to say? It’s because your conversation is so natural and the other person has completely Now that they understand your every move, the other person will know what you are thinking without even saying a word. Why do you still need to speak? Haha

The difference between strangers and familiar people is just a psychological difference. As long as the other person is friendly, why should you treat the other person as an outsider? Why not let the other person know you and let the other person know you?

What’s so difficult about this? How long have you been doing this? Where is your hometown? Which year were you born? You can talk about whether you are married or not, whether you are a boyfriend or a girlfriend, etc. The most important thing is to talk