My mother said my IQ is only 76. I don't know how high my IQ is. All I know is that I am a very lethal person, and many people have been hurt by me. Some of them have lost hope in life, and some have even committed suicide. So I have always suspected that I have potential superpowers, and for some reason, this superpower is especially effective for my teacher.

I still remember the first teacher who died because of me. I was in the first grade of elementary school at that time, and the teacher took us to the wild for nature practice classes. Seeing the spring breeze blowing green and the willow branches branching, the teacher couldn't help but think of a question, so he asked: "Students, do you know how to identify the direction of the wind?" "I know!" A little girl in the class answered while picking up the wind from the ground. A leaf was thrown into the air. "Pick up a piece of something and throw it in the air. Watch it float in that direction. Then you will know." "Well, very good." The teacher praised, "Then which other students are willing to do it again?" Let me show you what kind of wind is blowing now? The wind was blowing up and down! ”

…………

I can’t remember what the teacher’s expression looked like at that time. I only remember that he gave up after struggling for a few times. Died. Later, doctors at the hospital said that he died due to a sudden strong stimulation that caused his blood to go backwards and become a demon. In this way, I killed a people's teacher.

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The first-grade teacher taught us about poultry animals.

Teacher: "There is an animal with two legs. Every morning when the sun comes out, it wakes you up and doesn't wake you up until you wake up. Which animal is it?"

I replied: "Mom!" The teacher almost died from laughter!

After I got home from the mid-term exam, my mother asked me how I did in the exam. My dear son said, I didn’t fill in one question. My mother asked what the question was. My dear son said there was a question about what is the result of multiplying 3 times 7. I filled in 15 regardless of the situation. My mother sprayed the water she just drank into my father's face. Hey... I'm so great!

My dad asked me how school was?

"My dear son," the father asked, "is your female teacher satisfied with you?"

"Ah, yes, dad, very satisfied."

"How do you know? Did she tell you personally?"

"Of course, Dad. She said to me the day before yesterday: 'If all students are like you, I will leave the school right away!' "Explanation, I have learned it all." My dad's brain immediately said: "@$#$%#$#"*—..."@$#$%#$#"

One day in math, the teacher Ask 1+1=? , I said I don’t know. The teacher asked me to go back and ask. I asked my mother. She was cooking and told me to get out. I asked my dad, and he watched the game again and shouted "It's cool!" I asked my sister, she was singing, singing BABY. I asked my brother, who was on the phone and said: I'll wait for you outside.

The next day, the teacher asked 1+1=? I said, "Get out of here." The teacher slapped me in the face, and I screamed. The teacher called me a loser, and I called me despicable. As the old saying goes; get lost. I said; BABY, I'll wait for you outside. Our math teacher had high blood pressure on the spot and fainted...

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When I was in Chinese class in elementary school, the whole school All the Chinese teachers went to listen to Teacher Ni’s class. Teacher Ni wrote the word "being" on the blackboard and asked me: "Do you know this word?" I answered "No", and Teacher Ni started to inspire me: "Do you have a bed at home?" I answered " "Yes", "What's on the bed?" "Matt", "Where's it on the mat?" I answered: "My mother." Teacher Ni thought to herself, this is right, mother has a quilt on her body, so she continued: "You What about my mother? "My father." Teacher Ni never expected that I would say this and make a fool of myself in front of so many teachers. He asked in a hurry, "Where is the quilt?" I replied: "The quilt is on the ground." Teacher Ni was so angry at "me" The patient is admitted to the hospital!

Later, the school changed a teacher and asked us to make sentences. I completed the homework calmly and the teacher was very impressed with me. The sentence I wrote was:

Sad - the big ditch in front of our house Very sad.

If - canned food is not as nutritious as fruit juice.

Innocence - It's really hot today, a good day for swimming.

Ten points - my sister only got ten points in math, which is really embarrassing.

Calmness - When I do things, I always start with the easy ones.

Ginseng - The teacher said that everyone must try their best when participating in the team relay tomorrow.

Quilt - Xiaoyu's sanitary napkin was stolen.

Lunchbox - Xiao Ming regards defecation as the first thing he does when he gets up every morning.

The teacher touched my head and said sternly: Go home from school and work hard 10 articles. When I got home, there was no one, so I was ready to complete the homework assigned by the substitute teacher. I went to the toilet and started to smear the walls with feces. , I painted the entire bathroom ten times before I stopped when I was satisfied with my work. My family came back and scolded me. The next day, my mother went to the principal to sue the substitute teacher for misleading her children. Later, the substitute teacher was fired. Hey... I mentally said to myself: "I am very proactive in my appearance. Being ugly is not my original intention. God, please don't lose your temper. I will live bravely and bring out the beauty of the world!!!" ! ! ”

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While chewing gum, I Put your feet on the walkway.

At this time, the teacher said to me: "Please spit out what is in your mouth, and then put your feet in."

My brain: "@$#$ %#$#”

In the days that followed, several more teachers met with misfortune. Fortunately, no one died, and no major leaks were made. However, my fame spread like wildfire and I became a celebrity in the city. However, celebrities also have the pain of celebrities, and I deeply understand this.

When I was in junior high school, the physics teacher asked me in physics class: How do you change the trajectory? Me: According to the Diamond Sutra, if a person does bad things in the sun and dies, he will become a ghost! It turns out that the teacher is talking about how satellites change their orbits!

I was woken up by the teacher while I was sleeping in history class. The teacher asked me: "Who did Princess Wencheng marry?"

Xiao Wang whispered to me: "Songtsen Gampo." He didn't hear clearly, so he opened his mouth and answered: "Song Dynasty cadres." Later, history did not make any progress.

One day I came back from the barber shop pretending to be cool. When I opened the door, all the girls exclaimed: "Here comes the cool guy!" I scratched my head in embarrassment: "Where! Where! I just got a cool haircut." That's all." The principal happened to walk by and said seriously: "I have to hand it over to the office even if I pick up some pants!" Fortunately, it's okay, I'll go to the dormitory. I walked downstairs from the girls' dormitory and saw a friend who boasted loudly, "Look, I got a cool haircut." Immediately on the second floor, a girl stuck her head out and said, "My pants!" ! ! What you picked was my pants! ! ! ! ! !

During the exam the next day, the biology teacher brought a bird covered with cloth. Then he exposed the bird's legs and asked the students to guess what kind of bird it was. I really didn’t know, so I handed in a blank paper. The teacher was very angry when he saw it and asked: "Why did you hand in the blank paper? What's your name?" When I heard this, I rolled up my trouser legs angrily, exposing my legs and said, "Now it's your turn to guess who I am. Are you done?" The biology teacher fell down immediately~~~~~~

My fame has brought me a lot of trouble. All middle schools in the city refused to admit me out of concern for the safety of their teachers. I had no choice but to go to the countryside with endless longing for a key middle school. Although the conditions in the middle school in the countryside were a bit tough, without the pressure of public opinion, I was still living at ease. However, gold always shines, and the silence unique to rural middle schools did not suppress my outburst. By chance, I came out of nowhere, suddenly emerged, and quickly occupied the rural market.

One day, I was late, and the teacher asked, "Why are you late today?" I said: I took the uncle next door’s boar for breeding this morning, so I was late. Before the teacher finished listening, his eyes widened and he said, "You should let the uncle next door do this." I puzzled and said, "It has to be a boar, and the uncle next door is not an animal."

It was an intellectual competition. Our class and another class still had no winner after the final competition.

So the host announced the final decision: each class drew lots to send one representative. The two representatives then guess the coin. The person who guessed correctly asks a question to the person who guessed incorrectly. If the person who guessed incorrectly answers correctly, the person who guessed incorrectly wins. On the contrary, the class of the one who guesses correctly wins. The sky is moving, the earth is moving, I can't even hide from my errand. I was actually chosen as the representative and successfully guessed the wrong coin and entered the question and answer phase. The teacher and classmates suddenly became nervous, and everyone looked at me with eager eyes. Especially the head teacher, Mr. Li, looked heavy and said nothing. I also felt some pressure, but not because of this, but because of my opponent - Wang Xiaofo. Wang Xiaofo was the most powerful "famous teacher killer" in our school at that time, and he also had several murder cases under his hands. It is said that the previous principal met his end in its hands. But I still have some confidence, because after all, I am also a person who once shocked me. The questions began.

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Wang Xiaofo put his hands in his trouser pockets and said slowly: "My mother boiled a few eggs today and put them on the Do you know how many there are in my pocket?" "Coax!" There was an uproar around me. I don't know why everyone is making noise, but I know that this question arouses great interest in me. egg! I barely heard what question he asked. I only heard the word "egg" clearly. You must know that in the hard days in the countryside, there was almost nothing to eat. Two eggs would be a really delicious meal. I seemed to see the shiny egg white and tender yellow yolk... "If I get the answer right, will you give me a piece to eat?" I had long forgotten about the quizzes or class honors. All I'm interested in are eggs, eggs! "If you get the answer right, I'll give you both eggs." "Coax!" There was another uproar. I saw a look of astonishment on the face of the other classmate, while my classmates cheered and hugged each other to celebrate the victory. Teacher Li also cast a delighted look at me. I don’t know what they were happy about, but everyone was looking towards me. I smiled, and I smiled at them sheepishly, and then replied: "Is it five?"

The students' smiles froze in an instant, and gradually disappeared like an ebbing tide. No trace. But the other classmate suddenly started shouting and laughing. Things in this world are changing so fast. In the blink of an eye, everyone is crying and laughing, and everyone is crying and laughing. I don’t know what to do. I haven't had time to think carefully about what happened. The venue suddenly became chaotic. I saw one person lying on his back, blood spurting out from his mouth like a pillar, and then he slowly fell down.

"Teacher Li!"

"Teacher Li!!!"

She is our head teacher! I also hurried over. The teacher's face was pale, his eyes were closed, and he was unconscious. "It was him who killed Teacher Li!"

"It was him!"

"It was him!!!"

Oh! Uh-huh! Uh-huh! Uh-huh! Swish, swish, swish! ! !

A bunch of angry eyes shot at me like sharp arrows.

My eyes went blank, and a voice echoed in my ears: "Duolong! Close the door! Let the dogs out! All idlers should retreat!"

Later it was said that Teacher Li was not dead. , it was just a serious illness. After he recovered and was discharged from the hospital, he saw through the world of mortals, became a monk in Mount Wutai, and stopped teaching.