The influence of one’s native family will determine one’s life’s destiny.
This sentence is most suitable for Lin Yun.
In the novel "Ball Lightning", Lin Yun refused to listen to others' dissuasion several times and took extreme actions. His arbitrary actions when capturing ball lightning bubbles, his rashness during a sea ambush, and his actions during macro-fusion Impulsivity...these behaviors all have deep reasons.
Moreover, her "end justifies the means" does not apply to everything, but just out of her obsession with weapons.
And this has a lot to do with her childhood experience.
When Lin Yun was a child, her father had been working on the front line of the army and was often away from home. She was mostly raised by her mother, so she was very attached to her mother.
Once, Mother Lin participated in the Vietnam War on the Yunnan front line and was the commander of a communications company.
A division-level battle broke out that day when a vital telephone line was cut. Mother Lin personally took four signal soldiers to check. Several people were ambushed when they reached the break point. They persisted desperately. After connecting the line, Mrs. Lin was stung by an attacking bee and died of poisoning a week later.
"At that time, the skin all over her body was black and ulcerated, and her face was so swollen that her facial features could not be seen clearly. The death process was very painful. Five-year-old Lin Yun saw her mother for the last time in a hospital in Kunming ...Since then, the child has not spoken a word for a whole year. When she spoke again, her language had become very fluent."
From General Lin Feng's mouth, we learned. I learned about Lin Yun’s mother’s experience.
Lin Yun was originally very attached to her mother, but she couldn't bear such a thing.
What is difficult to understand is that the impact of such an experience on Lin Yun was not to make her hate everything about war, but to make her even more passionate about those things.
"Dad, I didn't expect macrofusion to be so powerful."
"You have already made one-third of the country defenseless."
After macrofusion occurred, Lin Yun's quantum ghost told people her feelings on the big mirror in the Gobi Desert, and everyone knew how she got to where she is today step by step.
"I remember that night, it was the Mid-Autumn Festival and it was also a Saturday. I was the only child left in the military kindergarten. I was sitting on a small stool in the yard, holding the mooncakes given by my aunt. , instead of looking up at the round moon, she stared at the door eagerly. The aunt said: Good boy, Dad has left the army and cannot come back to pick up Yunyun. Today Yunyun has to sleep in the kindergarten. I said: Dad has never been there. Pick me up, my mother will come to pick me up. The aunt said: Your mother is gone, she died in southern Xinjiang, and she will never come to pick me up again. Although I have known this for a long time, I have been waiting for more than a month. The dream was completely shattered until then. During that time, the gate of the kindergarten always appeared in my field of vision when I was awake and in my sleep. The difference was that in the dream, my mother always walked into the gate over and over again, and when I woke up, my mother always walked into the gate again and again. The place was always empty... This Mid-Autumn Festival night was a turning point in my life. My previous loneliness and sadness suddenly turned into hatred, hating those who took my mother's life and made her lose everything on the Mid-Autumn Festival night. The one I left in kindergarten.”
After that, she kept thinking about weapons. For example, training bees to sting the enemy, letting pigs eat the enemy's feed to starve them to death, using a trumpet to make strange sounds in the middle of the night to scare the enemy to death...
She felt that this had become a It was a charming game that she never tired of playing.
Later, Lin Yun slowly adapted to life without his mother, and the childish hatred in his heart also faded over time, but this "charming game" never stopped, accompanied by all kinds of fantasies about weapons. With her growth.
Later, when Lin Yun was in second grade, her father took her with him when he went to the south to participate in the formation of a military unit. Unexpectedly, this finally made weapons a part of Lin Yun's life.
The location of the army is very remote, and there are no other children around. When General Lin is busy at work, it is his subordinates and colleagues who play with Lin Yun. They are all officers of the field army. , most of whom have never taken care of children. The most toys they gave her were bullet casings, of various sizes, and Lin Yun used them as whistles.
Once, when an uncle, an officer and soldier, was teasing Lin Yun, he couldn't resist her determination to clamor for bullets, so he fired a shot into the sky with his submachine gun. Lin Yun heard the whistling sound of bullets passing through the air, and touched the warm barrel of the submachine gun. All the weapons he imagined in the past games suddenly became so weak, and the real weapons in front of him became irresistibly attractive.
Those rough-edged men in the military thought it was cute when they saw a little girl who liked guns, so they continued to use guns to make her happy, and finally even let her shoot.
"At that time, I held the gun and felt the vibration when it fired, like other little girls holding a singing doll. Later, I saw the firing of light and heavy machine guns on the training ground. , the sound was not harsh to my ears, but rather like a song that made me happy... By the end of the holiday, I no longer covered my ears when grenades exploded and recoilless rifles fired."
Later, Lin Yun came into contact with more weapons, such as tanks, heavy artillery, warships, etc. The one that had the most profound impact on her was the flamethrower.
"I watched excitedly as the roaring fire dragon spread a small sea of ????fire on the beach. A lieutenant colonel of the Marine Corps said to me: So, you know what is the most terrifying thing on the battlefield. ? It's not a gun or a cannon, it's this thing. On the battlefield in southern Xinjiang, one of my comrades was licked by its tail. As a result, the skin on his body fell off at the touch. It's really better to be alive than to be dead. In the field hospital, he used a pistol to kill himself while no one was paying attention. At that time, I thought of the mother I saw last in the hospital. Her skin was all ulcerated, her fingers were swollen and black, and it was impossible to kill herself with a pistol... ...This experience may make some people stay away from weapons for life, but it may also make others become obsessed with it. I belong to the latter group. There is a power hidden in the terrifying machine, and it is this power that fascinates me like a drug. ”
In a relatively difficult shooting training, the training results of the soldiers were not ideal, but Lin Yun achieved excellent results. General Lin recalled: "At that time, I watched the fire-breathing machine gun vibrating steadily in your white and tender hands. Those were the hands of a twelve-year-old girl. I also saw the remaining air in the barrel of the gun blowing. The bangs on your little forehead, I saw your big eyes reflecting the light of the muzzle, and the ecstasy and excitement in your eyes... Xiaoyun, I was scared at the time, really scared. , I don’t know how my daughter became like this.”
Later, Lin’s father tried to let his daughter get involved in music, art and literature, trying to correct her from that terrible tendency.
However, he failed.
In Lin Yun's own words, "You planted beautiful flowers in my heart, but you didn't look at the soil."
It is difficult to replace this soil. .
Not only that, these music, literature and art allowed her to understand the beauty of weapons on a deeper level.
"I realized that the beauty that can cultivate the temperament of most people is weak. Real beauty must be supported by inner strength. It is through more penetrating emotions such as fear and cruelty. You can gain strength from it, or you may die on it. Weapons embody this beauty most vividly. From then on, my fascination with weapons rose to the level of aesthetics and philosophy.”< /p>
If the previous experiences made Lin Yun cold-hearted because of weapons, then another thing was probably the "last straw" that made her even crazier.
After Lin Yun entered the military academy, he met a Russian woman who was an expert in biological and chemical weapons on a weapons forum.
Because of similar hobbies, the two became very good friends, and once went to Indochina together to participate in an investigation on the impact of biological and chemical weapons. There, they each learned about the other's unfortunate past.
Lin Yun learned that the elegant lady in front of him could not be reunited with her family because she was engaged in weapons research, and her daughter had died because of drugs. Lin Yun had a special feeling for this mother who had lost her daughter, and the relationship between the two became even closer.
Later, Lin Yun and Dr. Chen went to Siberia to investigate ball lightning and visited her when passing by Moscow.
There, Lin Yun learned something that made her collapse.
The bee that stung Lin Yun’s mother was genetically engineered by the Soviets and is extremely toxic and aggressive.
The person in charge of this work was this person who was "like a mother" in Lin Yun's mind.
In order to comfort Lin Yun who collapsed, the lady spoke her mind.
"Those terrible things may one day fall on the heads of your compatriots and relatives, and on the delicate skin of the baby in your arms. The best way to prevent this from happening is to Build it before the enemy or potential enemy! Child, this is the blessing I can give you." After this, Lin Yun completely embarked on the pursuit of weapons. The way back”.
Hidden in a person’s behavior is his past. In "Ball Lightning", every time when a decision needs to be made, and when everyone else is in a dilemma, Major Lin Yun can always give a firm attitude almost cold-bloodedly. Her personality is different from that of ordinary girls. The formation of her decisiveness, impulsiveness, and stubbornness is inseparable from her special family background and her childhood experiences with war and weapons. No matter how scared, angry, or confused I was at the time, I felt relieved after learning about her past.