Shocking Quotes 1

1. Youth is gone, but acne is still there.

2. Is the departure of the stool due to the pursuit of the toilet, or the persistence of the buttocks.

3. One day I will let you appear in our household registration book

4. People say that I am beautiful, but in fact it is all made up.

5. Fat and haggard.

6. Even if you beat me to death, you haven’t even used a honey trap yet!

7. I smoke because it hurts my lungs, not my heart.

8. Flowers do not belong to the people admiring them but to cow dung.

9. Although the bird is small, it really covers the entire sky.

10. Poor Nike, rich Adidas, hooligan wearing Armani.

11. I was born to take the exam.

12. No matter how powerful Tang Seng is, he is just a monkey trick.

13. What’s the use of being handsome? Can I use my face to buy things with my card?

14. Missing after a breakup is not called yearning, it’s called shame!

15. Lie down wherever you fall. Shocking Quotes 2

1. Sunflower, a flower that grins at the sun.

2. A true warrior dares to face the number on the scale.

3. Lower your eyebrows and keep playing, keep playing, and play all the infinite things in your heart.

4. Remember to spray perfume when going out and don’t spit when talking.

5. Why are you so stupid? There is no way your parents made you.

6. My bad qualities can bring out your good qualities.

7. I think I look pretty everywhere, but why don’t I look good?

8. Although you are a crooked melon and cracked jujube, you have a lot of fancy words.

9. The society is stylish and the sister is decent, but the sister is not the one you want.

10. I was speechless to you that night. I am obsessed with you tonight. I’m sorry.

11. The jokes you told made even Spongebob cry.

12. The brothels are full because people are lonely.

13. Your manliness makes my nose feel like catching a cold.

14. You have forgotten everything you said to me that winter.

15. What used to be cold-blooded has now become heart-wrenching.

16. Mom said that the girls you bring are different every time.

17. I am flat-chested, I am proud, and I save fabric for the country.

18. Don’t regard my indulgence as your capital.

19. Come on, I’m going to give you a slap in the face.

20. There is no free lunch in the world. Then I will only eat breakfast and dinner.

21. Only mother is good in the world. Dad is also good.

22. There are no handsome guys in the world, but with advanced technology, there will be naturally.

23. People often say that an itchy wound means it is about to heal.

24. What you wear is dangerous, but you look very safe.

25. Why do women like to watch the sea? Because they like waves.

26. If people are not smart, they still imitate other people’s bald heads.

27. Don’t say I’m being irritable, but I’m actually a lady.

28. Asking you how much sorrow you can have is like a group of eunuchs going to a brothel. Shocking Quotes 3

1. Even if you dare to live forever, I don’t dare to live forever

2. You are about to expire, find a partner quickly

3 , A tragic life can only end with a tragic life

4. The calabash kid in the mountains has never seen Ultraman in the city

5. Please put away your pity and sympathy , rolling all the way towards the sun.

6. Thoughts can be dirty, but life must be healthy.

7. I may be burdened with handsomeness that I shouldn’t have in this era.

8. Asking what money is in the world makes people die without resting in peace.

9. Since the space music was replaced by anxiety, I found that there are fewer and fewer people running the hall.

10. I have to admit that you have the confidence of Sister Feng, the figure of Sister Furong, and the beauty of a flower.

11. I can skip eating for you, but can you skip drinking water for me?

12. Life is like boiling noodles. If you put the water in before it boils, you will not mature prematurely, but will only be very entangled.

13. Paratroopers are like eagles who have landed on the ground. They are born It’s surrounded

14. It’s time to eat. It's time to drink. Don’t think too much about troubles

15. Because I have a golden mouth and jade teeth, I don’t speak easily.

16. My only shortcoming is that I am too handsome, and my only advantage is that I discovered my shortcomings.

17. Brothers, it’s okay not to worship God. But you must pay homage to Guan Gong.

18. A real hero dares to face the fact that he has become fat

19. The present dream determines the future, so it is better to sleep for a while

20 , I hope that all the girlfriends you find in the future will be inflatable

21. Examinations are not conducive to the healthy growth of students

22. My dear, let me be buried in your ancestral grave.

23. The most important thing during the week is to spend time on the weekend, and the most important thing on the weekend is to lie in bed

24. I was eighteen that year, like a rose.

25. The computer has the same language as me. Every time I look at him gently, he will freeze subconsciously.

26. It makes me feel chilled to see the test paper that I have corrected countless times.

27. I deleted you because you are too insignificant in my sister’s Q.

28. It’s time to take the exam. Unfortunately, everyone else is reviewing while I’m previewing.

29. Who said I was delicious? I didn’t even eat it even if my hair fell into my mouth.

30. In the age of cheating, who still believes in true love? Shocking Quotes 4

1. There may be several women in the world who don’t eat, but there is not even one woman who is not jealous.

2. Women tend to yearn for men; men tend to yearn for women.

3. It’s different when you enter university. There are changes both physically and mentally. Physically, I was hunched over; mentally, I was decadent.

4. The person who double-teams Yao Ming the most tightly in the world is Ye Li.

5. NND, I stretched my abdominal muscles and strained them.

6. It’s better to buy a pet for your girlfriend, otherwise she will always play with my bird.

7. Because I love you with all my heart, so I can only give up on you heartlessly.

8. Kettle, why are you crying? Is it because your butt is too hot?

9. I can’t even eat whatever I want, it’s so disgusting.

10. Marriage is a prison, so everyone is overjoyed after marriage.

11. When I have money, let’s buy two lollipops. You can watch me eat one lollipop, and I can eat the other lollipop to show you.

12. Life is too difficult. In order to master the art of eating, I am practicing using chopsticks with my left hand.

13. Don’t look at the information, but look at the results.

14. Listen to your words and hang yourself on the southeast branch.

15. It is everyone’s responsibility to eliminate the four pests: chase away flies when eating, eliminate rats at work, chase away cockroaches at night, and swat mosquitoes when sleeping.

16. If I don’t beat the shit out of you, you will be considered clean.

17. When you don’t have a girlfriend, you are a good citizen. When you have a girlfriend, you are released on bail pending trial. When you are engaged, you are under residential surveillance. After you get married, you are imprisoned for life.

18. I have to change my laptop. It takes 5 minutes to start up, and the battery only lasts for 3 minutes.

19. Men are as unreliable as the dogs on the QQ farm.

20. If you want to make chopsticks in your next life, you won’t be lonely.

21. Countering is like falling in love. The highest level is to be bold, careful, and thick-skinned. The minimum requirement is to make a move when it’s time to make a move.

22. Maybe one day, when you put on your wedding dress, I will already put on my cassock.

23. A confident woman is not necessarily beautiful, such as Sister Feng. A powerful woman may not necessarily be charming, such as Master Miejie.

24. How long have the two been embracing each other? The two are watching the excitement.

25. I told my mother a bad joke that day, and then she threw away my refrigerator.

26. There are three thousand broilers in the harem, which makes the little Rising lion so beautiful.

27. The little fish pestered his mother for a necklace, and the mother asked: "What do you want? Hasn't your sister taught you a lesson?" I have to wear earrings, so what happens? I guess I got caught by a fisherman.

28. Past love has been formatted; current love, this page cannot be displayed or is temporarily unavailable; future love, the memory is seriously insufficient, please close some programs and try again.

29. I often want to know the truth, but don’t want to accept the truth.

30. Time is equal to money. After all, I lose money every day. Time is expensive these days and wages are too low.

31. If the name can determine the fate, I would like to change my name to Qian Duoduo.

32. The cow hit the high-voltage line, it was really awesome and lightning-fast.

33. I pull my hair every day and it doesn’t hurt.

34. You are really tired of the eunuch who does not understand the emperor.

35. Don’t mess with me! I'm in a good mood now.

36. I sold the love letter for only two yuan. Alas, this relationship is really cheap.

37. Love makes people forget time, and time makes people forget love.

38. Why lose weight? You are not thin at all.

39. It is better to be a champion than to be an honoree.

40. If beauty is a letter of recommendation, then kindness is a credit card. Shocking Quotes 5

Enterprises must have unique capital that cannot be stolen, bought, opened, taken away, or escaped.

Never hang yourself from a tree. You can try it several times on the surrounding trees.

Money is not the problem, the problem is lack of money!

Money can buy a house but not a home, it can buy a marriage but not love, it can buy a clock but not time. Money is not everything, but the source of pain. Give me your money and let me bear the pain alone!

The result of being diligent but not efficient is: the stupid bird flies first and then disappears.

Youth is like toilet paper, you may see a lot of it, but once you use it, it won’t be enough.

People are willing to stand up for a stranger, but cannot tolerate the improvement of someone around them. Because there are contrasts and conflicts of interest between people of the same level, but not with strangers.

Human nature is greedy, but without greed society will not progress.

People are afraid of being famous and pigs are afraid of being strong. Men are afraid of being poor and women are afraid of being fat.

Life is like a dance, and the person who teaches you the first steps may not be able to accompany you until the end.

Roses say: not all flowers represent love; diamonds say: not all diamonds represent eternity.

Bring a newspaper to the toilet. I am a scholar.

Boys must be poor, otherwise they will not know how to struggle; girls must be rich, otherwise they will coax them away with a piece of cake.

It doesn’t matter if your head is empty, the key is not to get wet.

Your ugliness has nothing to do with your face.

Do you think I will watch you die? I'll close my eyes.

The 30-degree smile at the corner of your mouth cannot be found in Baidu search.

Big birds can be found in any forest!

The one riding the white horse may not be a prince, he may be Tang Monk; the one with wings may not be an angel, he may be a birdman Lei Ren Quotations 6

　1) In her room There was a watch, a piece of sashimi, and a balloon inside, which means: to express anger...

　2) By the way, I forgot to tell you, there is no such thing as UPUP breast enlargement exercise. I made it all up. If you really need it, silicone padding is the way to go. Goodbye.

3) Don’t get married easily, especially to a woman.

4) More stubborn than an ox, just like a rhinoceros!

5) A fool stole a beggar’s wallet and was seen by the blind man. The mute roared, which startled the deaf man. The hunchback stepped forward, the lame man kicked him, and the wanted criminal wanted to take him to the police station. Mazi said, forget it for my sake...

6) I ate the sesame seed cakes and ate the beer caps. My son, I ate wontons and found mothballs, I swatted flies on nails, I went to Qingsong Temple to burn incense, my cell phone fell into the merit box and I couldn’t get it out.

7) The noise in the world is just clouds, but the tranquility in the book is eternal.

8) Never be unkind to others, because you may also be disliked by others. On the contrary, don’t be discouraged by being disliked by others, because you may not be disliked by others at any time.

9) This drama is really good, especially your screenwriter, who is so talented. He must have graduated from a school for the mentally retarded. The plot he wrote was worse than a sheep's voice, and even the amoeba couldn't survive the keyboard he touched. The biggest difference between him and pigs is that pigs can't turn into humans at will, but he turns into a pig every now and then. I guessed he wrote the script using pig's trotters, and I suggested he take some hemorrhoid medicine to treat his foot-and-mouth disease.

10) Love is when you fall in love with someone, you will give up your own freedom in exchange for his. Fall in love When you fall in love with someone, you will change your life and fulfill his or her wishes. Love is when you fall in love with someone, you will be willing to let go and leave the best memories and blessings. Shocking Quotes 7

1) I thought I was God, who could settle myself and save all sentient beings.

2) It turns out that there is something more painful than listening to Mr. Zeng’s program, which is waiting for his program to start.

3) When faced with two choices, flipping a coin always works. Not because it always gives the right answer, but the second you throw it in the air, you suddenly know what the result you want is. Tossing a coin is not because he can make the right choice, but because the moment he tosses it into the sky, you will know the result you are expecting

4) Some things you have fantasized about for a long time, in the end you You will find that it is not as expected, neither beautiful nor terrible. The result is actually ordinary, but it still cannot stop the young heart from longing for it, going crazy for it, and jumping over the red hurdle in front of it. Think, maybe only the blue impulse is left, but you will really find that the things you want to throw away have been left behind, and what you want to get is already firmly in the palm of your hand.

5) No wonder I feel so light these past two days. I often see a white fox running in the rain. It turns out it’s because of that strange flower from the Western Regions!

6) I can Not to help you, I just want to prove that I am the only one in this world who can bully you, no one else can!

7) I smoke because it hurts my lungs and not my heart!

8 ) If, it is just an excuse to avoid differences.

9) Most of the so-called beauties are slaves to cosmetics.

10) The first half of love is taken from the abnormal transformation, and the second half is taken from the abnormal state.

11) I always like to make plans, always thinking about taking the next step when I am ready, but plans can never keep up with changes, just like that toy store, it may have closed long ago when I am ready. .

12) In my dictionary, there is no distance between points, only the fate between hearts.

13) Every bit of life has become a red thread between you and him, one strand, two strands, three strands... Gradually, the red threads gather into Once you have the red rope, you can no longer let it go. Love comes quietly, whether you are ready or not, you already belong to each other.

14) If you are framed or slandered by others. Be calm and determined. Your reputation is very important to your future.

15) Listen to other people’s stories and shed your own tears.

16) Don’t you just want to win against me? Let’s count you as the winner, okay?

17) As the saying goes, money can make a difference.

18) This feeling is just like the plot in old comics. A sailor sees the girl on the deck, then turns to his companion and says, hey, did you see that girl? One day , I want to marry her back.

19) Lenovo’s failure to recruit you is really their biggest loss!

20) There are too many bad things in life, and you can’t avoid them if you want to.

Shocking classic quotes from iPartment

1) God makes you wait in order to let you wait for the right person. The happiness at this moment is God’s blessing, and you are grateful.

2) Zeng Xiaoxian: Was Yifei really asleep just now or pretending to be asleep? If she was really asleep, was she talking in her sleep or sincerely speaking? If she was sincere, then she took advantage of the confusion Just confess to me, who told me to be so talented! The problem is that confession only has the primary stage, and the advanced stage is: waiting for you to confess to me!

3) A romantic encounter is not about waiting alone, but mutually. give.

4) Do you have such a girl by your side? She has three obediences and four virtues, never gentle, never considerate, never unreasonable, never beaten, never scolded, never messed with. If you do, don't treat her like a man, because she definitely has a gentle side that is unknown!

5) Don't say that the world has abandoned you, the world has no time to care about you.

6) As long as you are happy, I am willing to go crazy again

7) If no one holds your hand, I will hold your hand.

8) Happiness is not the only purpose of doing something.

9) The train is moving forward. It doesn’t matter where you are going, the key is the scenery outside the window.

10) Opportunities are coming to me like raindrops. But I avoided them one by one.

11) If you were a flower, no cow would dare to poop in the future.

12) Xiaoxian: Listening to other people’s stories, shedding my own tears, finally vomiting out the congestion in my heart.

13) If you are driving a car and Xiaohong and Xiaoming are sitting in the car, who is the owner? Answer: Yes.

14) Go out and bask in the sun again. If you get darker, no one will call you an idiot!

15) I am always like this, and I should still be like this in the future. In that case, why should you follow the trend and change yourself? What others are doing may not always be right. Maybe you can find your mistakes only when you start the road again. My dear, I understand. There is no need to queue for real happiness. There are no traffic jams on the road to the future. Find it. Only through fun can you truly find your way home.

16) What kind of sword do you want to show? It’s just too self-indulgent to show off your sword. I don’t want to use a bright sword. A secret fight is more suitable for me!

17) Lu Ziqiao: Meijia, I just I want to prove that I am the only one in this world who can bully you.

18) When faced with two choices, flipping a coin always works because the second you throw it in the air, you suddenly know what you want it to be.

19) Money can buy a house, but not a home; it can buy marriage, but not love; it can buy a clock, but not time. Money is not everything, but it is painful. 'source. Give me your money and let me bear the pain alone!

20) The past is like smoke, and the grudges are forgotten with a smile. The junior sister becomes a married woman, and the cuckold remains in her heart.

21) When I see a doctor, I meet my ex-girlfriend as the doctor, when I take an exam, I meet my ex-girlfriend as the examiner, when I eat, I meet my ex-girlfriend as the chef, and when I have a funeral, I meet my ex-girlfriend as the host. It can be called the four major tragedies in life!

22) The worst date is the one that is so bad that it is unbearable to look back on and leaves psychological trauma!

　23) Some people will come back, and some people know that it is too difficult to say goodbye.

24) If your leg was broken tomorrow, would you stay at home and cry, or would you like us, put on your jersey and run and dance?

25) Ziqiao: Eating Malatang on the grass is the most dazzling ethnic style. Are you afraid that others won’t know that you are a fighting turtle among the country turtles?

26) Don’t hit people in the face, as a slap in the face will hurt your self-esteem

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27) The old man is him, he is Zeng Xiaoxian...

28) Can a walnut pinched by a door still nourish the brain?

29) Look You, don’t make facial masks or go shopping, you are here to watch Meteor Garden with a lot of ice cream, please, you can do archaeology for such an old movie

30) Your head and butt are on backwards again. Shocking Quotes 8

1. We promised to grow old together, but you secretly drank the oil.

2. Everything in this world can be fake, but the only thing I cannot tolerate is that the money in my hand is fake!

3. I swore that I would cut off my hands if I went online again, but I found out that I was the Thousand-Armed Guanyin.

4. The saddest thing is, isn’t it the monthly exam on your birthday? It's okay, I can still tolerate it ~ "Dear friends

5. Don't pretend to be cool with me, it's more than ten degrees below zero!

6. I must write today! ! This damn math, I will fucking kill you!

7. Spit is for counting money, not for reasoning

8. The poor play with cars, the rich play with watches, and silk plays with computers...

9. The space background music suddenly became better again, Sha Matt,

10. When I paid the mobile phone bill, I realized that my words are so valuable

11. When I saw you, I almost vomited the child out

12. Military training, heatstroke, collapse, medicine bought, out of stock. I laughed.

13. In fact, I am highly educated, but my temperament is more like a farmer.

14. Even the devil can’t teach a disciple like me.

15. Sometimes you think the sky is falling, but in fact, you are standing crookedly...

16. I really don’t understand why I still hang myself after pulling the hook when I was a child.

17. Do you have a dog around? The kind that can speak human language.

18. Who gave my QQ cough syrup? Why do I feel like this penguin hasn’t coughed for a long time.

19. Happy birthday to me! I hope my future wife will find me and we can register to get married and have children as soon as possible.

20. A large-scale disaster movie "School Begins" is about to be released across the country.

21. Behind a successful man there is a supportive woman, and behind a failed man there is a troublesome woman.

22. As long as you have a lesson in mind, no matter where you go, it will not be considered skipping class.

23. God, God, I hope that my future deskmate will be both a school sweetheart and a top student.

24. You dare to curse me for eating instant noodles without seasoning packets. I curse you for eating instant noodles with only seasoning packets.

25. Sister Na, if you don’t come back to Happy Camp, you will change your name.

26. I wish that all lovers in the world are long-lost brothers and sisters.

27. It’s time for mosquitoes to be taken off the shelves.

28. The bangs in the front grow quickly, so the hair in the back should follow suit.

29. When I want to sneeze, I can’t sneeze. I hold back the tears and they come out.

30. I want to be a good boy, but my personality gradually tends to be a bad boy.

31. The saddest thing is that your best friend likes your boyfriend, and your boyfriend’s buddy likes you!

32. What is home? Home is the place where wifi will automatically connect.

33. Why die on an onion? I still have a forest!

34. If I have an ideal, I will pursue it, otherwise I will die with my goal in mind.

35. Get out of here on any birthday or egg-breaking day! I'm still young and don't want to be that old!

36. If you don’t live well, you can’t afford to die. Cemeteries are now as expensive as housing.

37. For "white, rich and beautiful", I have met all three criteria - free food, rich status, and stinky beauty.

38. It's not that I'm not close to women, it's that I'm not close to women. I!

39. I am 18 years old. Happy birthday to me. I will not do anything illegal or disciplined in the future.

40. There are only two steps to make a girl crazy: first, take a photo of her; second, don’t let her see the photo.

41. There may be several women in the world who don’t eat, but there is not even one woman who is not jealous.

42. Women often miss men; men often miss women.

43. It’s different when you enter university. There are changes both physically and mentally. Physically, I was hunched over; mentally, I was decadent.

44. The person who double-teams Yao Ming the most tightly in the world is Ye Li.

45. nnd, I strained my abdominal muscles while stretching.

46. It’s better to buy a pet for your girlfriend, otherwise she will always play with my bird.

47. Because I love you with all my heart, so I can only give up on you heartlessly.

48. Kettle, why are you crying? Is it because your butt is too hot?

49. I can’t even eat whatever I want, it’s so disgusting.

50. Marriage is a prison, so everyone is overjoyed after marriage.