Who are you listening to?

At the music party, a famous singer was singing. At this time, an audience member started singing along with vibrato.

"Really like a cow!" her neighbor said angrily.

"Who? Is it me?" the man asked quickly.

"No, it's not you, it's this singer. She interferes with our appreciation of your singing voice."

Listen to music

Little John and his My uncle sat together in the concert hall and listened to music.

Uncle: "Do you know music?"

John: "Of course I do."

Uncle: "Tell me, what is that girl playing now?" ?"

John: "Piano."

The benefits of learning music

James proudly said to his friend: "My daughter is learning vocal music. I'm so happy."

"What, did she make you hear the beautiful singing?" "You can't believe it, she made me buy the neighbor's house, and the price was half the price of the house the day before yesterday. Already moved."

A blockbuster

Outside the examination room of the Conservatory of Music, a young girl stopped the examiner.

"Mr. Professor, don't you believe that my singing voice will become famous one day?"

"Of course, Miss. When you are attacked."

Escape is urgent

The symphony orchestra was rehearsing the last section of Stravinsky's "Rite of Spring". The conductor told everyone his understanding of each part of the music: the soft and beautiful horns symbolized The fleeing peasant girl, while the loud trombones and trumpets represent the chasing savages.

When he raised his baton, a sentence came from the French horn: "Master, do you mind if we play this part faster?"

Who is the most suitable

A woman discussed with her husband: "I want to put a statue of a music master on the piano. Who do you think is the most suitable among Mozart, Beethoven, and Liszt?"

Husband Answer: "Of course it's Beethoven."

She happily asked: "Why?"

"Because he is deaf."

The Lullaby of Failure

Annie: "My concert was a complete failure!"

Jim: "You can't say that, haven't you seen the audience applauding so happily?"

Annie: "It is this burst of too warm applause that makes me sad. What I hope is that the audience will fall into a dream, half awake, swaying from side to side, humming and haha..."

Jim: "Why?"

Annie: "Honey, I'm singing a lullaby."

Recovering life

A: "This time Music saved my life during the flood. Music is so precious!"

B: "Oh! Did someone come to your rescue after hearing your beautiful singing?"

A: "No, when I was washed away by the flood, my piano happened to float over, so I climbed up."

Close

When Cyril reached him When he was a guest at his least favorite nephew's house, he had to listen to his nephew playing the piano. At the end of the song, his nephew asked: "What do you think?" Cyril replied: "You should be on TV."

His nephew said happily: "Do you think I play well?"

"No," Cyril said, "If you were on TV, I could turn it off . ”

Music that dogs don’t understand

Thompson’s wife has been very happy recently and went to the street to buy a violin and take it home to learn to play. The "squeaking" noise annoyed Thompson to death. One day, the puppy at home also barked "woof".

Thompson boldly said to his wife: "Honey, can you choose a piece of music that dogs can't understand to practice?"

Willing to die

Yes This king loved playing the harp the most, but he played very badly. As long as he played the harp, everyone would run away. The emperor searched the entire court, but could not find a confidant.

He issued an imperial edict and pulled a death row prisoner from prison. The emperor said to him: "As long as you say that the piano I play sounds good, I will spare your life."

The death row prisoner thought: "Isn't this simple?" So he agreed to listen to the emperor play the piano.

However, not long after the king played, the prisoner on death row covered his ears with his hands and shouted: "Your Majesty, stop playing, I am willing to die!"

Great progress

"Our daughter has made great progress in practicing her voice." Mrs. Xiaoke said to her friend.

"Is the sound quality improved?"

"I am mainly talking about the volume. In the past, only people from this floor came to complain, but now residents from several nearby buildings come to complain. Complained."

Baffled

A judge took his young son to a concert in the Paris Theater. A soprano singer was singing a passionate song.

"Dad, why did the man threaten the woman with his stick?" the child asked.

"It's not a threat, he is the conductor of the band."

"If it's not a threat, then why is she screaming so loudly?"

Lullaby

Composer: "It took me ten years to write this lullaby."

Publisher: "Why did it take so long?"

Composer: "Because it always makes me fall asleep."

Undisturbed

An Irishman came back from a trip to London. A neighbor asked him how he had fun. He said: "London What a weird person. He keeps banging on your door and walls at night!" "What should you do?" "I won't be disturbed and continue to play my bagpipe."