I guess that young readers may be very unfamiliar with the "Gestalt therapy" I am about to talk about, and find it very strange. What is "Gestalt"? Is it the name of an ancient pagoda of some historic site? Or is it some kind of tower "format"? You guessed wrong! This has nothing to do with "tower".
"Gestalt" is a transliteration. There is a famous school of modern Western psychology called "Gestalt Psychology", or "Gestalt Psychology", because the original meaning of "Gestalt" is "Gestalt", "Style" or "Structure" and "Organization". " means. You may ask: Why is "mysterious" not called "Gestalt"? Just translate it into "gestalt". I would like to ask you to understand that this is not a "mystery", because the word "Gestalt" has been "conventional" in Chinese psychology and has been used for a long time. Moreover, I also have an idea. The more "weird" it makes people feel, the more it will deepen their impression and remember it more firmly. You said that Gestalt psychology is a relatively new school of psychology. It was developed under the influence of the development of modern physics, especially the theory of physical "fields" (such as magnetic fields, electric fields, gravitational fields, etc.) in modern physics. The basic theory of Gestalt psychology believes that human beings are a complete unity, and that all psychological activities and personality, including people's thoughts and feelings, are complete, regular, and in appropriate proportions. They also believe that the human brain is not a passive recipient, it is capable of active activities. Why can the human brain act actively? This is because the human brain is a fixed gestalt "brain field", and this "brain field" has "innate dynamic characteristics." Therefore, whether people perceive or adapt to external stimuli, all psychological activities will become the overall Gestalt trend.
However, Gestalt psychology is not a perfect theory. Its biggest shortcoming is that it regards "Gestalt" as an innate characteristic of the brain, separates the content of psychological phenomena from the external world, and is separated from people's life practice and the interaction between people and the social environment. Therefore, Gestalt psychotherapy, which is created based on the principles of Gestalt psychology, has the flavor of sitting quietly with your eyes closed and practicing self-cultivation.
However, I think the purpose of using this psychological method that has been proven to be effective is to prevent us from developing mental illness and to help us better maintain mental health, so that we can better It can adapt to the surrounding environment and even transform it, so there is no need to completely "criticize" it like "choking and abandoning food". I would like to mention here by the way that I always believe that the creation and development of the theoretical propositions of any school are the crystallization of the wisdom of all mankind. If they can continue to exist, continue to this day, and continue to develop, they still have their merits. As long as it is beneficial and useful to us, we might as well take it and give it a try.
"Gestalt Therapy" was founded by Dr. Frederick S. Perls, an American psychiatrist. According to Perls's most concise explanation, Gestalt therapy, like "biofeedback therapy," involves self-awareness. However, the "biofeedback method" is one's own self-awareness of one's own blood pressure, one's own awareness of the temperature of one's own skin, and one's own awareness of the potential of one's own muscles. Gestalt therapy is more extensive than biofeedback and is about one's awareness of one's own illness. In other words, awareness, understanding and awareness of what you are doing. It can be said that it is a self-cultivation method of self-treatment.
Gestalt therapy has "Nine Principles". These nine principles were originally proposed by Perls. Now based on my understanding and experience, they are introduced as follows:
"Live in the present". Don't always think about tomorrow, don't always regret what happened yesterday, and focus your energy on what you want to do today. Remember, you are living in the here and now, not tomorrow and yesterday. Regret, remorse, guilt and sadness cannot change the past, they will only make it difficult to carry out the current work; worrying about the future is a useless emotion.
"Live here". Thinking of you living here now. There is no use thinking about what is happening in the distance. It is useless to worry about the future; to be anxious and restless will not help matters. Remember, you are living here and now, not somewhere else far away.
"Stop guessing and face reality." You may have encountered this situation: For example, in your work unit, when you meet your boss or colleagues, you say hello to them, but they don't respond, or even smile. If you think about this and think to yourself, why do they treat you like this? Does this person have any opinions about himself? Are you wary of yourself? Do you despise yourself? Do you even think that he is hostile to me? In fact, you may not have expected that the person you are greeting may be preoccupied and in a bad mood. He may be thinking about what happened at home or something unpleasant, and may not pay attention to you greeting him. So don't let your imagination run wild just because he doesn't respond to your greeting.
It is meaningless to make random guesses. Many psychological disputes and obstacles are often caused by "taken for granted" that one has no actual basis for. Don't worry about yourself. "Stop thinking and feel more."
Modern society requires people to think more and feel less. What people are busy thinking about all day long is how to do a good job, how to get good grades in exams, how to have a good relationship with leaders and colleagues, etc. We rack our brains and use up our brain power, so we tend to ignore or have no intention to enjoy the beautiful scenery, listen to the pleasant music, etc. One of the characteristics of Gestalt therapy is that it emphasizes "feeling" as the basis of thinking, which is more important than thinking itself. Without feeling there is no way to think. Feelings can adjust and enrich your thinking. Moreover, a person is not a computer after all, and cannot be there day and night calculating endlessly. People are not machines. People need to use feelings to nourish their hearts.
Intuitive thinking is a very valuable psychological quality of human beings. However, because people now place too much emphasis on logical thinking, it is often ignored. The terrible consequence would be to turn people into emotionless machines.
"We must also inject unpleasant emotions." People usually want to have pleasant emotions such as joy, joy, etc.; but are not willing to accept those unpleasant emotions such as melancholy, sadness, desolation, etc. But this is not the correct attitude, because if there is happiness, there will inevitably be sadness; on the contrary, if there is sadness, there will also be happiness. Pleasure and displeasure are not only relative, but also exist and transform each other. Therefore, the correct attitude is: first, you should realize that there are both pleasant and unpleasant emotions, and secondly, you must be mentally prepared to accept both pleasant emotions and unpleasant emotions.
If a person is always "happy" and excited for many years, it is abnormal, and he may be suffering from mania.
“Don’t judge first, express your opinion first.” People tend to jump to conclusions immediately when others make slight mistakes or failures, and ridicule others for their poor abilities or "idiots" and so on. Many times, this is not the case because people's judgments are often wrong. Therefore, your task is first to fully express your feelings or emotions and fully express your opinions.
Gestalt therapy believes that the correct way to treat others and deal with interpersonal relationships should be: don’t judge first, but talk about what you think first. By doing this, you can prevent and avoid unnecessary friction, contradictions, and conflicts with others; and you can also avoid unnecessary troubles and anguish yourself.
"Don't blindly worship idols and authority." For example, it is not good to establish a religious ancestor or become a fanatical believer of any sect. In a modern society, emerging religions are most likely to have some kind of patriarch. The believers regard his words and deeds as "golden words" and believe in him and abide by him fanatically and unconditionally. In modern society, there are many disguised authorities and idols, which can imprison your mind and constrain your hands and feet, such as academic qualifications, qualifications, etc. Gestalt therapy has a negative attitude toward all of these.
We should not blindly agree with public opinions, thereby losing the habit of independent thinking; nor should we submit to others unprincipled, thus being deprived of the ability to act independently.
"I am who I am." Don't say anything: It would be great if I were so-and-so; if I were so-and-so, I would definitely succeed, etc. You should start from your own starting point and work hard to fully realize your potential. There is no need to blame others, nor do you have to have wild imaginations. You must be down-to-earth, start from me, start from now, do your best to develop your potential and do what I can do. The final goal and belief should be: "I am myself", to compare, learn, catch up and surpass myself.
This eighth principle of Gestalt psychotherapy reminds me of the respected old monk in the Japanese TV series "Zi Sanshiro". He has repeatedly taught a generation of martial arts master Zisanshiro: "Understanding is at your feet!" I think we can understand this philosophical motto of the old monk as: You are yourself, and you should be down-to-earth and follow what I do. Get rid of all kinds of worries, worries, jealousies, envy and other unnecessary worries, face the wall and practice hard, and you will eventually succeed.
"Be responsible for yourself." People tend to avoid responsibilities easily. For example, if your test scores are not good, you will blame your failure on your family environment or school; if your job is not good, you will blame your failure on poor leadership, poor conditions, etc. Push your own faults and failures to objective reasons. An important principle of Gestalt therapy is that you are required to do things yourself and be responsible for yourself.
Since Perls proposed Gestalt psychotherapy, many scholars, experts and professors engaged in psychotherapy abroad have continued to innovate and do so through practical clinical application. various understandings and explanations. For example, Associate Professor Naka Ishikawa of the Department of Psychotherapy Internal Medicine, University of Tokyo Branch, Japan, further specified Gestalt therapy into the following three items. He believes that these three items are also effective ways to maintain mental health in daily life.
① "Rhythm". Because the human body maintains a certain rhythm, whether it is the heart or breathing, therefore, people must have a rhythm in their daily lives, which is very important for mental health. Get up early and go to bed early, study or work from Monday to Saturday (Friday in Japan, Europe and the United States), and relax on Sunday (or Saturday plus); three meals at a time and in a quantitative manner... so that it is organized, orderly and rhythmic Keep going.
If it is disrupted for any reason, it must be adjusted in time.
② "Relaxation". The reason why people can't relax is because they fail to abide by the second principle we talked about above, "Now, here." For example, on the eve of an exam, if you are always thinking about the exam, you will not be able to sleep; if you can abide by the principle of "now, here", you will think it is better to go to sleep. In other words, don't worry about what will happen tomorrow. It is also important not to regret the past. If you want to review, reflect, and summarize yesterday's failure, then you should review, reflect, and summarize it yesterday.
③"Open". Open your mind and release all the tension in your chest. Some personal privacy or worries that are difficult to talk about can be vented through singing, painting, playing the piano, etc. In short, don't dwell on anything.
I once said at the beginning that the characteristic of Gestalt therapy is that you can adjust, control and master yourself based on the principle that you can be aware of your own disease. Generally speaking, Gestalt psychotherapy is a self-control method of self-cultivation. This therapy is still developing in clinical practice. Based on this, I think one more thing can be added to the nine principles proposed by Perls, that is, everyone must "correctly estimate themselves", that is, they must put themselves in an accurate position.
In daily life, there is an old saying that everyone likes to say: "What are you doing and yelling at?" If you sell pears, you can't say you are selling apples, right? Whichever industry you work in, you have to abide by your "duty" and do your best to do the work in that industry. Because each of us plays a certain "role" in society. Of course, this does not refer to the "role" of acting in a narrow sense, but refers to your "identity" and "status" in a broad sense. If you are a patient, then when you are hospitalized or receiving treatment, you have to listen to the doctor because you are in the "patient role" and "patient role". Everyone occupies a specific position in the entire society, so you have to fulfill your rights and obligations according to the requirements of this specific position, because the role you "play" stipulates this kind of rights and obligations for you. Norms of obligation. If you do not follow the norms that are unanimously recognized by society and abided by by everyone, then you will be condemned and opposed by society and others. For example, parents should raise and educate their children; children should honor their parents. When your parents are old and frail, have lost their labor force, or are sick, you should support and care for them, etc.
In daily life, people must perform your "responsibilities" according to different and specific "roles", otherwise there will be various conflicts or frustrations. For example, you may be a leader at your workplace, just like the heroine in the famous Soviet movie "Moscow Does Not Need Tears". She is the director of a large factory; but when she returns home, she is her daughter. A mother needs to raise and educate her daughter; towards her beloved future second husband, she can no longer act like a factory director and reprimand him in a stern tone: "You should do this! You You shouldn't do that!" However, because she violated the "role theory" in social psychology, it caused an uproar and almost caused a tragedy. She was in great pain and almost fell into a pessimistic and despairing schizophrenia.
Look, from the perspective of mental health, don’t we put ourselves in the right position? For another example, according to newspapers and periodicals, Margaret Thatcher, the contemporary British Prime Minister known as the "Iron Woman", when she left the Prime Minister's Office and returned home, she still went to the kitchen to cook and showed her strength at home. She is a "good wife and mother".
Therefore, I would like to emphasize two points: (1) Everyone has many different roles due to different conditions such as time, place, situation, etc. Since the roles have changed, you have to "play" different roles. Only by doing so can you be mentally healthy and avoid all kinds of unnecessary contradictions and conflicts.
If you can’t turn around in terms of knowledge, emotion and will action, and always stick to a certain role (often sticking to the role that you think can exert power for you), instead of According to your different status, if you implement the behaviors that people expect you to perform, it will be a bad thing and there will be mistakes. If you don't do it well, it may cause you to be mentally unhealthy at least, or contract mental illness at worst.