I am a psychology enthusiast, not a psychiatrist. My personal opinions are for reference only.
Social phobia must be related to past experiences. Regardless of the details of the patient's experience, the main aspects are generally the same: they have experienced several major mental stimulations, mostly in childhood or adolescence. In the early stage; and after these stimulations, the accumulation of life events makes similar scenes or emotions often appear in the mind, forming a strong suggestion, which eventually leads to a vicious cycle and the formation of social phobia. And the symptoms often progress from shallow to deep: first, they are just afraid of people who look like bad people, then they are afraid of strangers, then they are afraid of friends, classmates, and colleagues. In the most serious case, they are afraid of family members, and they are even afraid of looking in the mirror at night.
People with social phobia are mostly sensitive and suspicious by nature, and deep down in their hearts they are often self-centered, or to put it mildly, they have a strong sense of individuality. Although they are generally kind and even surprisingly generous at times, their popularity is still not very optimistic.
I think that to solve this kind of trouble, first of all, don’t take yourself too special. In fact, when others pass by you, they don’t deliberately look at you or pay attention to you. If you don’t believe it, you can stand In a hidden place beside the road, look at the pedestrians on the road as they pass each other. Is anyone deliberately looking at whom? Unless you are as beautiful as the moon and as handsome as Mars, haha ??O(∩_∩)O~
Think of yourself as an ordinary, ordinary person - you must be sincere in your heart and hide nothing from yourself This is only effective if you have to do it locally. Once you achieve this and restore yourself to an ordinary person, you have taken a critical step.
Then, there are two commonly used methods: memory adjustment method and real scene adjustment method. Memory adjustment is to close your eyes in a quiet place, slowly recall the scenes that you find scary, and then repeat them over and over again - you must know that no matter how scary a movie is, it will no longer be scary after watching too many. This is the same principle. While repeating, try to overcome your own fears. No matter how difficult it is at the beginning, as long as you have a little ability to "resist", you will succeed in the end. The key is perseverance. Real-life adjustment is to find places with many people to train your mental abilities. The more people there are, the less afraid I will be! The more terrifying you are, the more I will defeat you! You can make yourself often stand on the road or street intersection that you are most afraid of. If you are too stressed, find a place to sit down and adjust yourself mentally. Pay attention to your eyes and never deliberately avoid them or pay attention to them. These two extremes are manifestations of unrecovered social anxiety - it should be where it should be. No matter what you see, there will be no big disturbance in your heart. By this time, you can basically Just get on. Come and be inspired: When Chairman Mao was young, he specifically looked for places to study in crowded streets. In the end, he was able to hear the sound of gunfire and still be able to read books and maps calmly, which is why there are so many gods and ghosts. A brilliant victory in testing. You are a girl, right? Girls should also have a heroic spirit! Just like what Chinese medicine says, when the body is filled with righteousness and yang energy, people will be radiant and full of vitality!
The root of human fear is usually death, which is derived from evil. If a person is no longer afraid of death, there will be nothing that can scare him. No matter how ruthless or evil a person is, they are not worth mentioning. Women may also be afraid of sex. This is a sign of strong moral sense, but you exaggerated it into something pathological. Sex cannot be too indulgent, nor too repressed. Many unruly girls fall into the former category, and you probably fall into the latter category. First of all, it shows that you value chastity, which is an excellent and praiseworthy aspect. But just like in psychology, multiple dimensions are needed to evaluate a disease. The direction is one dimension, and the degree is another dimension. Even if the direction is correct and the degree exceeds the standard, it will be abnormal. Personal suggestion: You can date more male classmates. Of course, you must first correct your mentality. If you go too far and indulge, you will go to the other extreme.
Your purpose is to communicate with them about your study, life or work experience, support each other with them, and make friends - what people need most is support. This kind of support does not come from words and show, but from a kind of sincerity in the heart, which comes naturally. It is revealed in every aspect of your words and deeds, and you are personally warm - you may not even notice this process yourself, and of course you shouldn't notice it. Treat people sincerely and in an appropriate way, and only then will everyone like you and accept you - I believe you will!
If you can't do this for the time being, you can also watch more male-oriented TV movies, such as Soldier Assault, My brother is called Shunliu, my regiment leader, my regiment - haha, personal opinion, because I think these dramas are very masculine, the plots are witty and interesting, and they open your mind after watching them. I believe it will work for girls too!
Finally, well-read books, such as social phobia, should be available in the library, or they are also available online, such as verycd.com. You can learn by yourself, which is more effective and reliable than others' guidance. When a person's knowledge is broadened and his horizons are broadened, he will naturally have fewer troubles made out of nothing. Don't be a stay-at-home girl, don't be immersed in your own little world. It will definitely be beneficial to go to famous universities, go to various social occasions, go to wild fields, mountains, rivers and other beautiful places to take a look. Don't deliberately try to overcome tension, otherwise the more deliberate you are, the more nervous you will become. When you focus on the specific content of your study, the specific words spoken by others, the specific plots of TV and movies, etc., you will naturally feel less nervous. If you like literature and art, read some beautiful poems and prose, and your youth will be filled with bright sunshine and colorful memories! Don't let yourself get too tired.
Well, I finished writing. I went to Baidu today and found out that I became Guanyin Bodhisattva again, haha! O(∩_∩)O~ I wish you to overcome difficulties as soon as possible and embrace the beautiful spring of the Year of the Tiger!
PS: If you have points, please give me more prizes! O(∩_∩)O~