1. Dear user: Since most of your text messages are sent to the opposite sex, which has a very bad impact on society, we have suspended your text message function. Please bring your own bench to the nearby police station tomorrow. Learn style knowledge! 2. The most sage teacher Confucius: After he fell in love, he said: Love is like a husband! Nothing more. 3. What's going on? I dialed your cell phone just now. After the ring tone, the cell phone prompted: You are looking for a little silly pig from out of town. Please dial the pig pen area before the number. I can’t believe it! He dialed again and said: Sorry, the user you dialed is being slaughtered! 4. A lover will eventually become a piece of meat, and the eyes of the lover will be like a pig's pocket. If the love between two people lasts for a long time, it will not be about pork, pork and meat. I wish to be a winged bird in heaven, and a pig with a tail on earth. 5. There is something I have never dared to confess. I know I am poor, but I have always had a crush on you. Now that I am finally rich, I can proudly say it: Boss, I bought that pig head! 6. A girl asked a boy: Who do you think is the beauty of our class? Boy: You are not the class beauty, but you are also very beautiful. Girl: Then what do you think I am? Boy: I am the monitor and you are my son, so let’s call him Zebra! 7. It’s late at night, the birds have gone to sleep, and the mosquitoes are out and about. I miss you and look forward to you. I am destined to have insomnia tonight. The dream is lost, the soul is lost, why don’t you return the heart that was stolen from you? 8. Thinking of you is so beautiful, stuffed with Xinjiang roasted leg of lamb. Although I miss you, you are fat, but you still have weight in my heart. Being single is a mountain road, falling in love is a big road, breaking up is a fork in the road, trial marriage is a path to explore, marriage is a dead end, divorce is a way to survive, bigamy is a highway, no lover is a waste road, and too many lovers is a dead end. Hey, which way are you going? 9. Do you want roses? I won’t give it to you! Want some chocolate? I'm hungry for you! Do you want me to kiss you? You are so beautiful! Oh - dear, don't be angry, I just want to tease you! 10. I know! But there is nothing I can do about it. This marriage is the greatest arrangement arranged by God! Hey, all you have to do now is get rid of your husband and come with me. 11. I have a dream, I really want to be your cup of water: kiss me every day, take me with you to work and school, think of me when you are thirsty, hold me in your hands all the time, never leave me even for a day, love me for the rest of your life. I. 12. I miss you just like the Cowherd misses the Weaver Girl. I love you just like the mouse loves rice. I miss you just like the monkey breaks off the corn. 13. Now I feel that God has harmed me! Why did God create you and me? Why make us acquainted and not bring us together? 14. How many times have I told you, go to bed early at night and don’t go out, but you just don’t listen. No, it came into my dream again last night, making me unwilling to wake up! 15. Why do women always say something like this after being injured: Find an honest man and get married. . . We honest men offend anyone! 16. Watt: I stared at the boiling water in the teapot for a long time, and finally understood why love can make people crazy, and what is its motivation? 17. I give you a bouquet of roses, which I rely on to express my feelings; I give you a big peach blossom, which depends on my fortune; I give you a bowl of tofu flowers, and I laugh after eating them! 18. If you want to ask me, how I feel about you: I care about you! If I had to add an adjective to this feeling, it would be: I only care about you! 19. If you go to the toilet, I would like to be your toilet paper; if you wake up, I would like to be the eye droppings in your eyes; if you are so hot, I would like to be the only three feet of cloth left on your body. 20. Love is a kind of hope. This hope may turn into disappointment. Passion means pain and transition at the same time. When hope is lost, passion ends. 21. Valentine’s Day is coming. Whether you are in love and are employed, or are laid off after falling out of love, whether you are in love and have changed careers, or are single and unemployed after falling out of love, whether you are falling out of love, dating, and finding a job again, I wish you a sweet love. honey. 22. Car King Ford: When you go for a ride with your girlfriend in a car, I boldly ask you, is the car you are driving a Ford? 23. His girlfriend complained to her husband: When we were dating, you picked me up at the company door every day and took me to your home, but now you stay at home motionless. The husband replied: Before getting married, I led you on this road. Now, there is no need to lead you on it again. 24. Now hurry up and watch CCTV. Zhao Benshan was killed in a bomb. The police sealed off the entire Northeast. People died, people were injured, people were missing, and people were deceived! I heard you are quite smart. Do you know who I am? 25. You are like a phoenix flying in the sky. I am chasing you on the ground. Give me a chance! 26. Male: Every time I think of you, the stars will shed a tear. This is how the ocean is formed.

Woman: I fart every time I miss you. This is how the ozone layer is formed. 27. When a girl treats you cutely and says good night to you, he feels that you are different from others in his heart. You deserve to be spared, cash machine, encyclopedia information filter, scanning machine, free post-production, free photography, free logistics, free food courier. 28. It’s my life’s fault that I didn’t hold your hand. No matter whether I’m at the end of the world or right in front of me, you are the deepest missing and the deepest pain in my heart. 29. In the vast sea of ??people, my heart beats for you. Your seemingly indifferent expression makes me feel a faint pain. Your indifference makes me dare not express my feelings, but I can't help myself. Now I want you to understand that you are stepping on my feet. La 30. The hot girl called a taxi. Opponent: Miss, what will you wear later? Hot Girl: Red Miniskirt! Opponent: Where are you going? Hot girl: It’s up to the thighs! 31. When I see you, I am afraid of getting an electric shock; when I cannot see you, I need to recharge; without you, I think I will lose power. Loving you is my profession, missing you is my career, holding you is my specialty, kissing you is my specialty! 32. Just like you said, there are no words to express my mood. It's just like something is blocked in my heart. There are only two words, that is, I miss you! 33. Marry me, and I will flush your toilet with petroleum, bathe you with Pepsi-Cola, and take you to and from get off work with Boeing. Promise me? 34. There is an explanation for encounter called fate. There is a belief about life called reincarnation. And there is a complex for me called missing! If there is reincarnation, I hope to have you in every life! 35. Emotions are in arrears, love has been shut down, promises are empty, trust has been shut down, care cannot be connected, beauty is not in the service area, everything is suspended, and life is completely frozen! 36. Prescription: Valentine's Day text message; Ingredients: Sincerity, sincerity, words; Indications: Enhance the relationship between lovers and couples; Shelf life: a lifetime; Taboo: Never separate; Usage and dosage: Take once, valid for life. 37. Eating tofu will change your heart, falling in love will change your life. Sowing seeds on the cement floor will not produce buds. Wear a mask and kiss your head. I always send text messages and can’t see anyone. It’s so painful that I miss someone alone! Valentine’s Day is coming, I wish you happiness. 38. It’s been a week since I last saw your beautiful face. It feels like seven years. In these seven days, your beautiful image appears in my heart all the time! 39. Love means giving your sincerity, paying attention to the other person at all times, leaving every smile of hers deeply in your mind, and paying for the one you love without any regrets. Funny Ambiguous Missing WeChat Talk 2 1. Smart people gain a lot from other people's mistakes; fools occasionally gain from their own mistakes; the Kuomintang gains nothing from both kinds of mistakes. 2. When there is no mobile phone, the mobile phone is useless; when there is a mobile phone, the mobile phone is useful. 3. The academic performance of Chinese international students is often much better than that of the American students who study with them. However, ten years later, the scientific research results are less than those of others. The reason is that American students have active thinking, strong hands-on ability and creative spirit. 4. Wait. Maybe not so easy to hurt. But it was easy. 5. With you, there is peace in the world; with you, there is marriage in the world; with you, life is beautiful; with you, years are enchanting; with you, there are girls. Festival, with my blessing. 6. Even if no one is watching, you must work hard to grow. Many eyes are hidden in places you can’t see. 7. Snowflakes are flying, ushering in 2017 New Year's Day; turn on your phone and take a look, and send text messages to send your wishes; the new year is coming, happiness and health forever! Happy New Year 2017! 8. "I will be a man in my next life and marry the bestie I love most in my life." 9. It's still the same group of people. Time passed. 10. There are too many literary figures in the book, but after all, there are too few idiots. Who can write about you as diligently as I have used up Jiangnan? 11. Saying you love him is just an impulsive love story. 12. Don’t lose your temper randomly, no one owes you anything. You can never forget the past, but you must let it go. You don’t have that many viewers, so don’t be so tired. You are never as important as you think. 13. The day after my grandma left, my mother was not at home all day, and my uncle also hurried back from Guangdong. 14. Was there a moment when you wanted to turn one second into a lifetime? 15. Please bring them my deepest blessings to Dad! Happy birthday to you! 16. The winds and clouds are surging, and you are unwilling to be left behind. The course of life is fiercely competitive. Work hard, be determined, boldly innovate, be eclectic, think about changes and seek stability, be determined to forge ahead, and great things can be accomplished. New Year, new atmosphere! 17. That smile still remains in my memory.

18. She is my best friend. We don’t play tricks. If we are wrong, we will forgive each other and be quiet. She is my family and I love her very much. She also loves me very much. I hope we will never be separated. 99. 19. The most important thing for people to win is to win before going through difficulties. , let the ice point in your heart melt, only the winning self can be reborn. 20. If you follow it back, the road is long and difficult; if you follow it, you will wander in the middle of the water. 21. The continuous autumn water allows me to miss you endlessly. You are a fish, and I will be drunk in the water; you are the water, and I will guard the river embankment; you are the river embankment, and I am the willow Yiyi; you are the willow, and I am just a wisp of breeze. Anyway, I will depend on you forever. 22. Make friends with a smile, and happiness will come; walk with a smile, and happiness will come; shake hands with a smile, and happiness will stay forever; embrace a smile, and good luck will come; on World Smile Day, may a smile accompany you in your life. 23. If the director lets Big Big Wolf eat a sheep, the ratings will definitely skyrocket. 24. The love of some girls is destined to be a flower that cannot bloom in summer. 25. Sometimes you become my habit. Even if I don’t chat, I have to see your profile picture to feel relieved. Even if I don’t talk, I have to see you in my chat list to feel relieved. 26. Xiren likes bad men. 27. The best love is probably that I admire you like a hero and you pamper me like a child. 28. I want to forget...but I always remember it from the beginning, for fear of missing a small detail that once made me happy﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌After the rain, the weather will eventually turn sunny. The world has given me thousands of kinds of joy, blooming branch by branch along the way. It doesn’t matter if I miss them all, as long as you control my mind. 30. One more snowflake to accompany you to count down the time, waiting for the arrival of happiness. One more color to accompany you to silently count the time, waiting for the arrival of happiness. The New Year is approaching. I hope my blessings will bring you a little more warmth.