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How to prepare for interpersonal relationship and employment in universities?
I think what you need to understand is not only making friends in college, but also dealing with interpersonal relationships. What should we do and how to do it in college?

Here I give you a letter I recently found about Kai-fu Lee, which has been treasured for a long time.

I hope you will have a good experience and make your own way in college!

"There is a letter from a student that lingers in my mind:

Teacher Kaifu:

I will graduate soon.

Looking back at my so-called college life,

I want to cry, not because I left, but because I didn't learn anything.

I don't know how to write my resume. In the past, I would leave it blank.

Perhaps the greatest gain is ... patience and adaptation to nothing ...

This letter expresses the feelings of many junior and senior students. During college, many students indulge themselves and waste their time, and many students still can't find the right learning direction. When they were awakened by the first make-up notice, and when they received the first declined letter from the applicant company, these students were surprised to find that their future was so slim, and all efforts seemed to be too late ... < P > This "fourth letter" was written to those college students who hoped to wake up from their ignorance earlier, and those who had learned from the drought in Na Ba said that they had lost their thumbs.

University is the most critical stage in a person's life. From the first day of admission, you should have a correct understanding and planning for the four years of college. In order to enjoy the greatest happiness in study and find your favorite job when you graduate, everyone who has just entered the university campus should master seven kinds of learning: learning self-study, basic knowledge, practice integration, interest cultivation, initiative, controlling time and dealing with people. As long as these seven points are done well, the greatest gain for college students when they graduate will never be "patience and adaptation to nothing", but "confidence and desire to have everything". As long as you do these seven points well, you can become a happy graduate with potential, thought, value and prospect.

University: the key to life

University is the key stage of life. This is because, when you enter the university, you finally put down the burden of the college entrance examination and start chasing your own ideals and interests for the first time. This is your first time to participate in group and social life independently without family life. This is the first time that you have the opportunity to learn the theory and practice it yourself, instead of simply learning or reciting the theoretical knowledge in books. This is the first time that your parents no longer arrange everything in your life and study, but have enough freedom to deal with all kinds of problems in your life and study and control all your own time.

University is a critical stage in life. This is because, this is the last time in your life that you have the opportunity to receive a systematic education. This is the last time you can devote yourself to building your knowledge base. This may be the last stage of your life when you can spend a lot of time studying, or it may be the last time when you can have a high plasticity and concentrate on enriching yourself. This may be the last time you can learn how to behave in a relatively tolerant and ideal environment.

University is a critical stage in life. At this stage, all college students should seriously grasp every "first time" and make them the cornerstone of their future life; At this stage, all college students should cherish every "last time" and don't let themselves regret it in the near future. During the four years in college, everyone should work hard to weave their own dreams of life, make clear the direction of struggle, and lay a career foundation.

Four years of college is only once for everyone, and four years of college should be spent like this ...

The way of self-study: from learning by analogy to teaching without a teacher

I remember when I was a teaching assistant at Columbia University, a parent of a China student complained to me, "What on earth are you teaching in your university? My child has finished his sophomore computer department, and he can't even use VisiCalc[1]. "

I replied at that time: "The development of computers is changing with each passing day. We can't guarantee that any technology taught in the university will still be useful after five years, nor can we guarantee that students can learn every technology and tool. What we can guarantee is that your child will learn to think and master the learning methods, so that no matter what new technologies or new tools appear in five years, your child will be able to do it with ease. "

She then asked, "Learning the latest software is not education, so what is the essence of education?"

I replied, "If we forget everything we have learned, the last thing left is the essence of education.

what I said at that time came from the famous words of educator B. F. Skinner. The so-called "leftover things" are actually the ability of self-study, that is, the ability to draw inferences from others or learn from others. University is not a "vocational training course", but a platform for students to adapt to society and different jobs. During college, it is important to learn professional knowledge, but it is more important to learn independent thinking methods and cultivate the ability to draw inferences from others. Only in this way can college graduates adapt to the rapidly changing future world. I know many friends who came to the United States for graduate studies after finishing college in China. They think that after coming to the United States, what they lack most is the ability to think independently, whether in study, work or life, because they seldom think independently and make decisions independently at home.

in middle school, the teacher will repeat the key contents of each lesson again and again. But after entering the university, the teacher will only act as a guide, and students must study, explore and practice independently. After going to work, self-study ability becomes more important. Microsoft has done a statistic: only about 1% of the knowledge content that every Microsoft employee has mastered is accumulated by employees in the past study and work, and other knowledge is re-learned after joining Microsoft. This data fully shows that it is difficult for a person who lacks self-study ability to stand in a modern enterprise like Microsoft.

Self-study ability must be cultivated during college. Many students always complain that teachers don't teach well, they don't know much, and the school curriculum is unreasonable. I usually advise these students to say, "It is better to light candles than to curse the darkness". College students should not just follow the teacher's footsteps, but take the initiative to walk in front of the teacher. For example, university teachers usually cover dozens of pages of information in textbooks in one class, and it is impossible to learn all the knowledge through listening to lectures in class. The best way to learn is to figure out the relevant problems in the textbook before the teacher gives a lecture, and then make up for the shortcomings in understanding and understanding by comparing the teacher's explanation in class.

Middle school students are more about "remembering" knowledge when learning knowledge, while college students should ask themselves to "understand" knowledge and be good at asking questions. For every knowledge point, you should ask a few more "why". Once we really understand the ins and outs of theories or methods, we can learn other knowledge by analogy, solve other problems, and even reach the realm of self-learning.

In fact, many questions have different ideas or perspectives. When learning knowledge or solving problems, don't always stick to a mode of thinking, and don't make yourself a slave to textbooks or experience. Only when students dare to innovate in learning and are good at thinking from a new angle can students' potential thinking ability, creative ability and learning ability be truly stimulated.

the book of rites? 6? 1 The Book of Learning says: "Learning alone without friends is ignorant". In other words, college students should make full use of the talent resources in the school and absorb knowledge and methods from various channels. If you meet good teachers, you can take the initiative to ask them for advice or ask them to recommend some extracurricular reference books. In addition to senior professors, young teachers, doctoral students, master students and even their classmates in universities are the best sources of knowledge and learning partners. Everyone's understanding and understanding of the problem is different. Only by helping and learning from each other can we make progress together.

Some students once told me that they were envious of having a Turing Award-winning master preach and teach when I was studying. In fact, although I highly admire my teacher, he didn't teach me much professional knowledge during my college years. He just pointed out the general direction for me, let me share his experience, provide me with research resources and teach me how to be a man. He has no time and no need to guide me to learn specific professional knowledge. All the professional knowledge I accumulated during my college years was acquired through self-study. When I first started, I blushed many times and asked my brother for the most basic knowledge. I asked a lot of superficial questions in meetings and discussions, and I also took the initiative to discuss and learn from my classmates in my spare time. "There must be a teacher in a threesome", and college students are surrounded by mentors and friends. As long as we cherish these rare opportunities, ask questions boldly and often learn from each other, we can learn the most useful knowledge and methods.

College students should make full use of the library and the Internet, cultivate the ability of independent study and research, and prepare for future work or further study. First of all, in addition to studying the courses prescribed by teachers, college students must learn to look up books and documents in order to get in touch with a wider range of knowledge and research results. For example, when we find a subject we are interested in in in a class, we should actively go to the library to consult relevant literature to understand the ins and outs of this subject and the current research trends. Skillful and full use of library resources is one of the necessary skills for college students, especially those who are interested in scientific research. When reading, you should read as many original English textbooks as possible. Some original textbooks are written in a simple way, with a large number of examples, which are more suitable for self-study than Chinese textbooks. Secondly, besides books, the Internet is also a huge resource pool, and college students can look up all kinds of information online with the help of search engines. Since the opening of Kaifu Student Network for half a year, I have found that many students have not mastered the internet search skills well, and sometimes they can easily find the answers by simply searching in the search engine. Some students can easily believe online rumors, instead of using search engines to check and verify themselves. In addition to search engines, there are many websites and communities on the Internet that are also good learning gardens.

When you teach yourself, don't be complacent just because you have met the requirements of the school, and don't think that it is enough for you to do well in college. In the 21st century, talent has become an international concept. When you are satisfied with your grades, I suggest you start to teach yourself some international studies.