According to the statistics of Chinese Ministry of Civil Affairs, more than10 million couples registered to get married last year, an increase of 10.8% compared with 2007. 73% of them are under 30 years old. At the same time, 2.26 million people divorced through the court, an increase of 8. 1% over 2007.
In 2005, the number of married people was 8.23 million, and the number of divorced people was 6.5438+0.78 million.
Experts believe that the rise of these data across the country shows that there are serious problems in the marriage mentality of the younger generation.
Liu Qifen of Beijing Hongfeng Women's Psychological Counseling Center said: "These only children born after 1980s are a very special generation. They grew up with everyone's attention. "
They are the direct beneficiaries of China's reform and opening up, and their thoughts reflect the great changes in society.
Their intelligent, open-minded, spoiled and inconsiderate personality will affect the quality of their married life.
According to the official survey of China 1% population in 2005, since 1970, the only child under 30 years old has accounted for 29% of China population.
At the same time, according to the survey of 2888 adult only children by China Academy of Social Sciences in 2007, the average marriage age of people born in 1967 to 1986 is 24 years old.
But the question is: are they capable of taking long-term responsibility for marriage, or are they too self-centered?
Liu said that the only child has always been brought up under the care of his family. As a result, many young people are immature and unbearable.
Like getting married and having children.
"Compared with their parents who experienced political fluctuations and economic difficulties in the 1960s and 1970s, this generation of young people has never encountered difficulties in their lives. So when they quarrel in marriage, they will feel helpless and give up easily. "
Shi has a daughter named Liao Lin in Shenyang. She said, "Husband and wife must unite sincerely and overcome selfishness in life." "They should give more understanding and tolerance. After marriage, they may feel that their lives are out of balance, because they have to think of their other half from time to time. But they must help each other. Otherwise, marriage will become a big tug of war. "
Other reasons for the rising divorce rate may be that the newly promulgated laws and regulations on marriage registration in 2003 10 simplified the procedures for marriage and divorce.
Li Mingshun, a law professor at China Women's University, explained that premarital surveys were voluntary, but in the past, applicants needed permission from their employers to get married or divorced.
Now the husband and wife are divorced in the Civil Affairs Bureau, and they can get the certificate on the same day without waiting for a month's examination.
Sociologists have also attracted the attention of10.4 billion floating couples from rural areas. Duan, an expert from China Renmin University, said: "Among the migrant workers, people aged 20 to 30 account for 30%. At the same time, married people account for 60% to 70%. "
Shenzhen is a special economic zone in Guangdong. About 4 million migrant workers gathered there. According to the marriage survey conducted by the local women's Federation in 2004, the three main reasons for divorce are extramarital love, domestic violence and personality disagreement.
Although many people get married and divorce after 80s, they themselves think that this problem is not as serious as the older generation said.
"The public has criticized this generation too much," said Zhao Rui, 27, who will get married in Beijing. "We are the product of this era. We should not be blamed for the problems we have encountered. "
These people from the only child have both traditional and modern ideas. He said that husbands or wives nowadays are looking for independent, equal and suitable partners.
1970 before family planning, China was often a big family with many disasters. Three or four generations live under one roof. Now they are usually close-knit families with only parents and one child.
According to a survey conducted by China Academy of Social Sciences, nearly 50% of adult only children prefer small family structure, while only 35% do not live with their parents.
"The older generation with only one child will find a stable marriage for their children, especially if their own managers have experienced political turmoil and the extreme lack of living goods." Tian, CEO of, said. Lily. Com is a mainstream online dating service. It has150,000 registered members in China.
"But young couples don't just want a decent life. What they pursue is true love, happiness and fun. Unlike their parents and grandparents.
Wang Yin and her husband are successful models of happy marriage after 80s. Wang Yin, an only child in Beijing, has been married for six years. She said that the secret of successful marriage lies in communication.
"My husband and I are very different people. But we appreciate each other and learn from each other. " She said, "We respect each other's private space and can find ways to resolve conflicts of interest. We are equal to each other and can communicate even if we quarrel. "
Wang Yin said that half the fun in marriage comes from solving wars in various ways. She said, "My husband likes noodles and cakes, but I like rice. So we decided to eat instead. But because I cook most of the time, he must often eat rice. Of course, I also tried to cook more dishes to make him like rice more. "
Parents often put a lot of pressure on their only child. Children usually need to enter marriage with their parents' expectations.
Tian said: "On this website, at least one third of the members will go on blind dates accompanied by their parents. Parents should understand that children like to make their own decisions, not just obey their parents. "
Psychologist Liu Qifen said: "Parents can give their children some help in marriage and married life, but they must learn not to participate too much."
"Parents should enable their children to handle things and solve problems by themselves," she added. "It is important for young people to receive marriage education, understand the different stages of marriage and how to establish a family life."
Wang Yin thinks that more marriage agents should be allowed to help families with marital problems.
"Couples should learn to manage their own marriage, just as they manage their own careers." She said: "This kind of management is not naturally formed, and you can't ignore it. If you can realize that business is not easy, marriage will be stronger. "
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