In the adult world, the end of friendship never disdains to say goodbye, only consciously.
I told his story with my friend:
Z, a former colleague of the former company, had different interests at that time, but the relationship was OK. The only connection is that the other party introduced him to a girlfriend who is far below him in all aspects, and of course, he ended up with nothing.
After their friends left their jobs, they seldom contacted each other. It was not until he left his job again that he changed to a new company. The business of this new company overlaps with that of the previous company, which can be said to be "Party A".
Therefore, former colleague Z contacted him actively. My friend has worked in this company for more than four years. Almost this colleague Z has to contact him two or three times a year, and every time he asks for help.
Some are simple, some go to great pains, and then they are full of thanks, but there is nothing substantial. Then, disconnect again and ask for help again.
In May of this year, former colleague Z's WeChat came again, never saying anything, and kept saying: Are you there?
I'm catching up with my friend's house this time, and I have something urgent to deal with. I am very annoyed in my heart. Wechat did see it and didn't return it. In the next half hour, there were three phone calls.
My friend knows very well that the other party must be in trouble again this time, and he has to "ask for help". This is unbearable and out of courtesy, so he can only accept it.
When the other person came up, he said, why don't you reply to WeChat and answer the phone? Dude, what do you mean?
My friend said he had something urgent to deal with. Colleague Z said: No matter how urgent I am, please listen to me first.
After listening, my friend really asked for help, but it was not an emergency at all. Friends tell the truth, it will take about a day or two to deal with family affairs outside, and now I have no time and energy to take care of the company's affairs.
As a result, this colleague Z blew up on the spot and said I promised someone else. If you don't help solve it today, there will be nowhere to put my face!
My friend has a good personality. To say the least, just wait for me for two days. I'll go back to the company to help you deal with it as soon as possible. Colleague Z said, hurry up, buddy, take time to do it for me today. 10: 8. ...
My friend hung up the phone silently. It seems that my friend is exhausted.
Similar to the situation encountered by friends, of course, there are many friendships that seem to disappear "inexplicably", but in fact everything has a cause and effect, some because of you, and some because of him.
But in any case, there are hidden rules in adults' "diplomatic relations". There are some things you need to understand:
It is an adult's consciousness that others don't reply to WeChat or chase.
This is an era when mobile phones never leave their hands. There is a set of data on the internet: the average time for adults to watch mobile phones every day exceeds 100 minutes; You take out your mobile phone to unlock and turn it off dozens of times a day.
There are three situations when you choose not to reply to the message you sent: first, the other party does not attach importance to you and has an indifferent attitude towards your friendship;
Second, the other party wants to break contact with you, so it's better to remind you to be sober.
Third, you are the one who is not worth replying to, or the word "trouble" is written on your face, and the other party doesn't know how to refuse you.
The first time I sent a message, I didn't get a response; Sent a second message, or sink into the sea; By the third time, the uncertain answer in your heart is gradually clear, and it's time to leave.
We don't have to ask each other why they don't return my messages. Unless the job is special, there is a high probability that he didn't see it, but he just didn't want to reply to your message.
Many times we are waiting for an answer, but we don't know that not replying is a very clear answer. This is what you have to do, that is, tacit understanding. Stop posting and ask questions.
Adult communication pays attention to appropriate limits. If you don't like what I do, I will be more conscious. Don't go there. It is also a kind of respect not to disturb others.
Don't pester others if they don't reply to WeChat. Please leave us the "dignity" that we all deserve.
Whether it is a lover or a friend, the most taboo to get along with others is to please humbly. From the moment you deliberately please, you are doomed to lose this relationship one day.
In fact, when a person doesn't reply to your message, it's useless to force it. It is better to take the initiative to quietly withdraw from each other's circle, no longer take the initiative to contact, and choose to quit gracefully.
This way, you don't have to "tear your face" to make your face ugly. Let each other stay in each other's address book, without deleting, hacking or contacting. Until the two sides slowly disappear into each other's world, and there is no intersection.
We should have the ability to get used to anyone's hot and cold, and we should also look down on anyone's drifting away. Don't bother people who don't reply to your message. In fact, it is the best respect for yourself.
We should not mistreat every enthusiasm, nor should we please every indifference. Why are you so humble that you have to tell people the fact that you don't want to go back before you can give up?
You don't have to know everything to be a man, but you must hear the other person tell you the reason why you can't go back. This is ridiculous. Because all you hear is perfunctory and excuses, why bother?
It is better to wake up before being "rejected" and leave a decent job for yourself and each other.
The friendship between adults is "a few pounds and two pounds", and it will be clear if you don't return to WeChat once.
When we were young, we quarreled with our friends first, and then ignored each other, but sometimes our relationship didn't break.
However, when adults broke off diplomatic relations, there wouldn't be such a big movement. They don't bother and have no time to make noise. Some just don't return to WeChat once or twice, and they become strangers to each other, and the relationship is really cut off.
The attitude of a person who replies to your message represents your position in his heart. Although our life is much busier now than before, the other party doesn't reply to your message because he doesn't want to have any more intersection with you, or you are not worth it in his heart.
It's hard to accept this fact. When you see through it and feel relieved, you grow up. Many times, the distance will be opened by time and reality. Not returning to WeChat is a refusal and a clear response.
When adults break up, they are all quiet. There is no need to say where the other person is in the other person's mind. Two people don't need a sense of ceremony to be friends, and sometimes they don't even have to say goodbye to each other.
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The world is so big, thank you for seeing me!
This article was originally written by Wei Weian, and plagiarism will be investigated. /The picture came from the network and has been deleted.