1. Change the subject and create a relaxed atmosphere
In a communication situation, if a serious and sensitive issue makes both sides of the conversation very antagonistic, or even hinders the normal and smooth progress of the conversation, we can temporarily let it avoid it, by changing the subject, enliven the atmosphere with some relaxed and pleasant topics, divert the attention of both sides, or dilute the serious topic through humorous words, so as to revive the original stalemate, thus easing the situation. If friends are red-faced and deadlocked over a certain issue, they can say at the right time, "It is more difficult to win this issue than the national football team"; Or a joke, let the emotions of both sides calm down, let the embarrassment disappear in a relaxed atmosphere, and make the communication activities go smoothly.
Sometimes when people are arguing over their own opinions, the reason why the stalemate is difficult to ease is often not the views of both sides themselves, but the feelings of winning and competing with each other. In fact, the views on a certain issue are often not a fixed constant. With the change of environment and the shift of angles, different and even opposing views may be reasonable and correct. Therefore, we should seize this point when we beat around the bush, help both sides to look at the dispute from another angle, analyze the problem flexibly, and make them realize the relativity and inclusiveness of each other's views, so as to stop the unnecessary debate.
2. Find an excuse to give the other person a step down
Some people are in a dilemma in communication activities, often because they make inappropriate or unreasonable actions on specific occasions, which further causes embarrassment and embarrassment of the whole situation. In this case, the most effective way to make up for the situation is to change the angle or find an excuse to prove that the other party's perverse behavior is justified, understandable and reasonable in this situation, so that the other party's embarrassment can be lifted and normal interpersonal relations can continue.
3. Misinterpret in good faith, and turn an enemy into an enemy.
In communication activities, the two parties or the third party often say something that surprises others and act strangely, which leads to embarrassment and embarrassing scenes. In order to alleviate this situation, we can adopt the method of deliberately "misunderstanding", pretend not to understand or deliberately ignore the true meaning of their speech acts, and make an explanation that is conducive to resolving the embarrassing situation from the perspective of goodwill, that is, misinterpret the incident in good faith and guide the situation in the direction of easing. For example, at the beginning of this article, if we criticize any one aspect, it will only intensify contradictions and destroy the atmosphere of the party. At this time, the way to do farm manure is to make a "distorted" explanation of the language of both sides from the perspective of goodwill, deliberately understanding the words of the lady as a kind of "like" and guiding everyone to recall the good old days together. In such an atmosphere, everyone will soon forget the embarrassment and unhappiness, and the embarrassing scene that was supposed to be formed will disappear. Well-intentioned misinterpretation is not simply muddling along, but making up for others' temporary negligence, dispelling misunderstandings and unhappiness in others' hearts and ensuring the normal progress of interpersonal communication, so it is a very effective and necessary means of communication.
4. Assess the situation and make all parties satisfied
Sometimes, in a certain situation, when both sides of communication are arguing because they are not satisfied with each other's views, it is hard to say who is right or wrong. As a mediator, we should understand the psychology and emotions of both sides of the dispute at this time, so as not to favor one side over the other, so as not to deepen the differences between the two sides, and affirm their advantages and values, so as to satisfy their self-realization psychology to a certain extent.
once, the school held a cultural and recreational activity. Teachers and employees were divided into two groups, which arranged and performed their own programs and then scored. As soon as the performance was over, the people sitting below were divided into two factions, and there was a bitter quarrel. Seeing that the activity was about to come to a deadlock, the host had a brainwave and said to everyone, "Which group can win the first prize? I think it should be analyzed in detail." The teachers' group is full of creativity and passion, and should win the creation award; The staff group is full of vigor and spirit and deserves a performance award. " Then it was announced that both groups had won the first place.