We must master skills in interpersonal communication to make our interpersonal life better. Therefore, we must master the taboos in communication. Below are the nine taboo articles on interpersonal communication that I have collected for you. Hope it helps everyone!
9 major taboos in interpersonal communication
1. Do not inform each other when entering and leaving
You have something to go out for a while, or do not ask for leave At work, although it is the leader who approves the leave, you'd better tell your colleagues in the office. Even if you go out temporarily for half an hour, say hello to your colleagues. In this way, if your boss or an acquaintance comes to see you, you can let your colleagues have an explanation. If you don't want to say anything and are mysterious when you come in and out, sometimes if there is something important, others won't be able to say anything, and sometimes you won't be too lazy to say it. I'm afraid you will be the one who is affected. Informing each other is not only a need for colleagues to work together, but also a need for emotional connection. It shows the mutual respect and trust that both parties have.
2. Not talking about private things that can be discussed
There are some private things that cannot be discussed, but there is no harm in talking about some private things. For example, your boyfriend or girlfriend’s workplace, education, age, personality and temperament, etc.; if you are married and have children, there will be topics about your lover and children. After work, you can chat by the way, which can enhance understanding and deepen feelings. If these contents are kept secret and are never shared with others, how can they be considered colleagues? Talking about anything usually shows deep feelings; not saying anything naturally shows interpersonal distance. If you take the initiative to talk to others about personal matters, others will also talk to you, and sometimes you can help each other. If you don’t say anything and don’t let anyone know anything, how can people trust you? Trust is based on mutual understanding.
3. Reluctance to ask colleagues for help when something happens
It is right not to ask for help easily. Because asking for help always brings trouble to others. But everything is dialectical. Sometimes asking for help from others can show your trust in others, harmonize relationships and deepen feelings. For example, if you are in poor health and your colleague’s lover is a doctor and you don’t know him, you can find him through his colleague’s introduction so that you can get a faster and more detailed diagnosis. If you refuse to ask for help, if your colleagues find out, they will think you don't trust them. If you don't want to beg others, they will be embarrassed to beg you; if you are afraid of others' trouble, they will think that you are also afraid of trouble. Good interpersonal relationships are based on helping each other. Therefore, it is generally okay to ask for help from others. Of course, you have to be careful and try not to embarrass others.
4. Don’t report good things.
When the unit distributes items, receives bonuses, etc., you know about it first, or you have already received it, and you sit there in silence, like As if it was nothing, I never informed everyone that some things could be collected on my behalf, and I never helped others collect them. After doing this a few times, others will naturally think that you are too unsociable and lack a sense of community and collaboration. In the future, if they know about it in advance or receive something first, they may not tell you. If this continues, the relationship between them will not be harmonious.
5. Pretend that you don’t know even though you know it
A colleague is on a business trip, or goes out for a while, and someone happens to come to him or call him. If the colleague is not there when he leaves, Tell you, but you know, you might as well tell them; if you really don't know, you might as well ask someone else before telling them to show your enthusiasm. You clearly know, but you flat out say you don't know. Once it is known, the relationship between them will inevitably be affected. When outsiders are looking for colleagues, no matter what the situation is, you must be sincere and enthusiastic. In this way, even if it does not have any actual effect, outsiders will feel that you have a good relationship with colleagues.
6. Keen to inquire about family affairs
If you can talk, people will talk about it. If you can't talk, don't dig it. Everyone has their own secrets. Sometimes, people accidentally reveal their secrets, so don't pry or try to find out.
Some people are keen on inquiring and want to know everything clearly and thoroughly. Such people will be looked down upon by others. You like to pry, even if you have no purpose, others will avoid you. In a sense, it is an immoral behavior to pry into other people's private affairs.
7. Like to take advantage by talking
When getting along with colleagues, some people always want to take advantage by talking. Some people like to tell other people's jokes and take advantage of others. Even if it is a joke, they will never end up with themselves suffering a loss; some people like to argue, and they want to argue if they have reasons, and they will fight for three points if they don't; some people don't care about national affairs. , or small things in daily life, as soon as they see a flaw in the other party, they will cling to it and insist on letting the other party lose; some people also want to get to the bottom of an issue that is not clear in the first place; some people He often takes the initiative and when others don't talk about him, he always talks about others first.
8. Reject "snacks" from colleagues
If colleagues bring snacks such as fruits, melon seeds, and sugar to the office and eat them during breaks, don't push them away or feel embarrassed. Refuse them all. Sometimes, when someone among your colleagues wins an award or gets a professional title, everyone is happy and asks him to buy something to treat you. This is normal, and you can actively participate in this. You don’t want to sit by and say nothing, let alone refuse someone’s offer, showing an air of disdain or indifference. People enthusiastically offer things to you, but you often refuse them. As time goes by, people will have reason to say you are noble and arrogant, and find you difficult to get along with.
9. Often "bite one's ear" with one person
There are several people in the same office. You should try to maintain a balance with each person and try to always be in a state of non-departure, that is to say , don’t be particularly close or distant from any one of them. In normal times, don't whisper to the same person all the time, and don't always talk to the same person when you come in and out. Otherwise, the two of you may be close, but more likely to be estranged. Some people think you are forming a small group. If you are often "biting each other" with the same person, but others come in and stop talking, then others will inevitably have the idea that you are talking bad about them. Five technical skills in interpersonal communication
1. Good emotions are one of the conditions for effective communication. Emotional changes lead to behavioral changes. Research shows that when college students experience positive emotions, their behavioral goals are often positive and vivid. When college students experience negative emotions, some college students' social interests decrease, they lack challenges, and they lack self-confidence. Emotions affect those around you. Negative emotions will affect the normal study and life of other students, so you must be good at regulating and controlling your own emotions. The quality of emotions affects interpersonal relationships. Emotions are contagious and contagious. People who are optimistic, enthusiastic, self-respecting, and confident are more popular among the crowd, are more likely to be appreciated by others, and are more likely to form good interpersonal relationships. People with low self-esteem, depressed emotions, and prone to anger often cannot get along with others normally and have difficulty communicating, which leads to alienation between people.
2. Using self-training methods to resolve interpersonal confusion, you must first do the following:
1. How much do you know about classmates’ interactions; 2. Downplay shortcomings and look for advantages; 3. Break down interpersonal relationships The ice of communication. Secondly, you must master some interpersonal communication skills, such as learning to listen; communicating effectively to leave a good first impression; when making friends, do not simply pursue utilitarian interactions. It is human nature to make friends for mutual benefit, but do not treat your interactions with friends as It is purely a utilitarian communication, because in addition to helping each other with things, the communication between friends also has the functions of exchange of ideas, complementary knowledge, emotional comfort, etc. If friends blindly pursue utilitarian communication, then such Friends don't last long. In short, if you make friends well, the friendship will last forever. On the contrary, the friendship between friends will be fleeting and fleeting.
3. Choose friends? Choose good friends and make friends. There is a misunderstanding in making friends in many people’s minds, that is, the more friends the better, this idea is wrong.
The more friends you have, the wider the scope of communication, and the more time and energy you need. However, human energy is limited. If you communicate widely indiscriminately, you may be busy with communication all day long, and have almost no time and energy to be yourself. Things to do. You should make friends based on your actual situation, especially those who are good friends. Therefore, when choosing friends, you should make friends with those who are honest, sincere, broad-minded, knowledgeable, and like-minded.
4. Interactions? Moderation is appropriate, which mainly means that all behaviors in interpersonal communication must be proportionate and just right. We must achieve appropriate enthusiasm, modesty, expectations, and communication. Therefore, the communication between friends, whether it is the time, frequency, distance, etc., must be kept just right, so as to achieve the artistic conception of "unfinished feelings and unfinished love".
5. Communication? The closeness and distance of interpersonal relationships are mainly reflected in emotional closeness, and emotional communication and integration are the key to interpersonal communication. Appropriate praise of others can bring people a beautiful and pleasant emotional experience. Everyone has the need to be respected and affirmed by others. Choosing the right time and the right way to express praise for each other between friends is a catalyst for enhancing intimacy. . At the same time, you must learn to be humorous, because in interpersonal communication, it is very important to speak humorously and have a strong sense of humor. Vivid, vivid, and humorous language can not only ease a tense and serious atmosphere, but also better express feelings. Express ideas, express certain meanings that are inconvenient to express clearly, and enhance the euphemism and implicitness of language. You also need to put yourself in someone else’s shoes, that is, be considerate of other people’s attitudes and emotions. In life, conflicts between people are often caused by misunderstandings. Looking at the problem from the other person’s perspective makes it easier to discover your own shortcomings and understand the other person. Difficulties, understand the other person's psychological needs at this moment. Only when you are good at understanding other people's situations or feelings can you think about what others think, worry about other people's needs, and help others when they need it. Learning to think from others' perspective can help us understand problems correctly, avoid conflicts and win friends. Interpersonal relationships play an irreplaceable role in human development. For college students, developing normal and healthy interpersonal interactions is of unique significance for them to adapt to college life.