What is the reason why feelings are hot and cold? Once a woman loves a man, she will be swayed by considerations of gain and loss. When she is not in contact, she feels empty, sometimes cold and sometimes hot. Let's share the reasons why feelings are hot and cold.

What is the reason for the feeling of being hot and cold? 1 the first reason is that after a long time, the other person will think that you have no feelings for him and don't want to waste too much time on you. When he felt that there was no hope of recording, he decided to give up. In fact, the boy's mind is very simple and can be put down. If it's not his own, it's not. It's no use trying again. If you also like this boy, take the initiative to show your attitude. In this case, if you make a statement, he will be very happy and will make him fall in love with you completely. It's not easy to meet a boy who likes you. Don't miss a wonderful marriage, or you will regret it.

The second reason is that when men and women get along, boys are hot and cold to girls. I think it can only explain one problem, that is, this boy is not loving enough. If a boy loves you enough, he will never want to stay away from you for days. No matter how busy he is, doesn't he have time to eat and sleep? If boys really love you enough, they will take time to make a phone call and send a text message, even if it is "OK, I miss you", which will make girls feel warm. Of course, I think if we love each other, there is no need to be bored and affectionate every day. After all, life doesn't have to be in love every day. Nowadays, people are under great pressure, and their efforts are mutual. If you really love each other, you can also send a short message when the boys are busy, appropriately express your concern, pay each other and understand each other. How can he be willing to be cold and hot to you?

The third reason is that boys will feel frustrated and in a bad mood. Girls have emotions, so do boys. Ask yourself, doesn't it give people the feeling of being hot and cold? Never look at a problem from your own point of view, it's selfish. If a boy likes you, isn't it normal to be hot and cold to you? You don't express your thoughts, and boys don't know whether you like him or not. If a boy feels tired, it is normal to be cold and hot.

What is the reason why feelings are hot and cold? I don't think you want to work hard.

There is a good saying, "The harder you work, the luckier you are!" If you want to have a bright future and live a happy life, you must work hard and never give up. If you don't work hard, that is, you are not motivated, then no one else will be ashamed to be with you. This is obvious in ordinary friends, not to mention lovers who are interested in staying together for life. When the other person thinks that you don't want to work hard, he will have doubts about the future of two people, whether the future life can be stable, and thus have doubts. With this idea, the feelings between lovers will be alienated and gradually become indifferent to each other. If you don't change it in time and indulge yourself all the time, it will also cause irreparable consequences.

I like playing games too much.

Now people's lives are getting better and better, and there are more recreational activities, including games. Playing games can be said to be a way for many people to kill time. Moderate playing games is good for the body and mind, and can relieve the pressure brought by work. So it is also loved by many people, but everything has advantages and disadvantages, and it is not good to exceed a certain limit. If you like playing games too much, then your life is just a game and you won't think about anything else. Even doing sports is better than lying down and playing games all day. At this time, lovers will think that you are addicted to games. It is ok to relax properly, but it is equivalent to playing with things. To put it mildly, no one wants to have in-depth contact with such people.

You don't understand each other's needs.

If one day, the relationship between you suddenly cools down, then you don't have to feel very suddenly. Short-term outbreaks are all formed by long-term contradictions. An important reason for this situation is that you don't understand each other's needs. A pair of close lovers, sometimes don't need to say too much, just give each other a look to understand the meaning. To tell the truth, two people have been together for so long, and if there is no tacit understanding at all, it can't be said. So sometimes it is understandable that the other person is angry. For this phenomenon, try to avoid it if you can.

You always lose your temper.

Everyone likes to listen to sweet words. When two people live in peace, it is really beautiful. Even if they are not rich, they can feel very happy, but a quarrel will break this situation. Therefore, if two people's feelings want to be stable all the time, their personalities should not be too grumpy. No one likes a person who always loses his temper. When he loses his temper, he can say anything. When you find that your lover has alienated you one day, don't be surprised. You should reflect on your own problems first. If you are the other person and go home happily every day, you can't stand it mentally, but you will lose your temper. It is also because you can't stand your state that you will gradually alienate you. What you have to do is to get rid of this bad habit quickly.

You refuse to share your thoughts with each other.

If lovers want to go far, they must trust each other. What is the premise here, that is, to learn to confide and share joys and sorrows with each other. If you can't even do this, what kind of lover is that? You always hide your troubles and refuse to share them with each other. After a long time, the other person will think that you don't believe him. He doesn't get your 100% love. In this case, the lover will be disappointed in you. How can you maintain a good relationship between two people after accumulation again and again?

You are not generous enough.

People should not be too stingy, but generous, and they should not be blinded by a little self-interest. Imagine that when you two go out to eat together, you could have been very kind, and you could go shopping or something after dinner. Then you upset the plan because you have been haggling over every ounce. No one will be in a good mood. Once or twice, there is no problem, and the other party will still be very happy. I am happy that you can manage your family diligently. However, too many times will lead to irritability, because some small interests are like this, and the other party will only think that you are stingy and don't want to be with you.

Emotional message: love needs to be managed with care. Only in this way can the relationship between two people continue. When you learn to reflect on yourself and correct your shortcomings, you two will have a better understanding and will not be in a state of hot and cold.

What causes the feeling of being hot and cold? 1. It may be these six situations that you are hot and cold.

In the first case, liking you is not enough.

With a low sense of need for a person, it is easy to treat others casually. Imagine that if you love someone very much, you will naturally please them in every way, for fear that you have said something wrong to make them unhappy. How can you be cold and hot to each other? Therefore, in reverse reasoning, the biggest possibility that he is hot and cold for you is that he has a low sense of demand. In other words, he doesn't like you enough.

So you can be cold and hot as you like, and it will be cold when you are busy with other things, because your sense of demand is higher and your usability is stronger. The other person won't worry that cold and heat will make you leave. He just thinks that you like him anyway, so he has nothing to hide. Even if he only chats when he is lonely, he doesn't intend to have any long-term development with you, so he will soon lose interest. Not sure he likes you.

In the second case, take the initiative to reduce your sense of need.

Contrary to the first case, the other person likes you very much and is eager to get your response, so he uses some small means. The reason why he is hot and cold should be that he feels too active and seems too free. As the saying goes, licking a dog has nothing. He realized that he was too active and seemed to be a bad thing, so he forced himself to pull away for a short time, which showed you that it was very hot at first and suddenly cooled down.

He hopes to close your relationship by temporarily ending his active behavior and some means to attract you to pay. In other words, he hopes to inspire you to explore him actively in this way, and actively increase your emotional input, so as to attract you and achieve his goal.

The third situation is a warning to your behavior.

Many girls are very enthusiastic about you at first, and suddenly they ignore you. It's quite possible that you did something that upset her. That's what women do. They won't make things clear, but they will let you guess through actions.

For example, if you get too close to the opposite sex, she will take the wrong medicine. Instead of being unhappy, she will be angry. This kind of anger seems to be hot and cold to you, but it is actually her warning to you.

The fourth situation, avoidant attachment personality.

In fact, he wants to maintain this relationship, but for many reasons, he can't do it well himself. Maybe he feels inferior and insecure about his feelings. I long to be near you, but I'm afraid I'll get hurt if I get too close.

This is the characteristic of avoidant attachment personality. They may have left a little shadow when they got along with their parents in childhood. They are always eager and afraid of intimacy, and will push away after getting love to protect themselves from love.

It's hard to say that he doesn't like you enough, but the emotional treatment of this character usually presents a state of hot and cold. You must get along well with people with avoidant attachment personality, find problems and deal with them in time when the other person is upset, and don't let this situation continue.

In the fifth case, your conditions do not meet the expectations of the other party.

This is a very common situation. At first, the other person is attracted to one aspect of you, such as your appearance, and interested in you. However, the other person is inclined to choose a spouse. After contact, I found that you were not what you expected, not what you wanted, so you quickly showed a negative attitude, here is a cold and hot attitude.

Although you are not the kind of person he wants, what attracted him at the beginning is still there. To him, you are tasteless and it is a pity to abandon it. He doesn't want to kill you at will, so he will give you some enthusiasm and sweetness from time to time. This relationship will give you hope every time you want to give up. Maybe you are just a fish in his fishing ground, so it is difficult to reach the top.

In the sixth case, you are in his inspection period, and he is already on your holiday.

Most couples don't agree with each other until they are warm-hearted, and there is also a time difference between two people's psychological identification with each other as the other half. It is very likely that you will be him while you are still in the other party's inspection period.

At this time, you will respond so eagerly that you will think that he is hot and cold for you. In fact, his relationship with you is only maintained in a normal range of friends. Maybe sometimes he gets closer and makes you feel that you are soul mates, but it's actually just an affair, and the other party is still enjoying it.

You are scratching your head and thinking, "Does he like me or not? How come he hasn't returned the message for 30 seconds! " Now, if you look at this psychological state from God's point of view, the problem is not that the other person's behavior is hot and cold, but that you are too eager for this relationship and mistakenly think that he is deliberately hot and cold for you. There is no point in reading each other's minds. It's important to realize your mentality.

Second, follow suit and make a clever response.

Circuitous tactics: guide him to take the initiative to attack

To sum it up. You already know the reason why he is hot and cold, so what should we do?

At this time there is a particularly useful method-questioning method.

Especially when he is warm to you and teasing you!

For example, he said, "You are the most beautiful!"

By asking questions, you can say to him, "I don't think I am beautiful." If I am beautiful, why don't you like me? "

This is questioning method, that is, whenever he praises you, you deny his praise of your merits and add, otherwise, why don't you like me?

The core of questioning method is that no matter what he praises you, no matter what he says, you pretend to doubt that he is interested in you and deny that this boy likes you.

"I don't think I am wise. If I am sensible, why don't you like me? "

"It seems that you just don't like me!"

"You don't like me. There is nothing you can do about it. Hey ~ "

What's the good of saying that?

You can imagine that every time you say this, if he really likes you and is hot and cold because he doesn't know your attitude, then he will understand when he hears you say this, and he will finally prove to you that "you don't think it's right, I really like you!" ";

If you are playing hard to get, you will think that you have gone too far, which will make you misunderstand that he doesn't like you, thus increasing the offensive to let you know his mind and avoid misunderstanding.

At the same time, you also released a signal that you have a good impression on him, that is, you are actively guiding him to establish a relationship with you.

He may continue to prove to you:

"I really like you! I watch your circle of friends every day. I look at your head every day and wonder whether you have eaten or not. "

If you are still in the ambiguous stage and you like him very much and want to be with him, then you can find a suitable time and say, "If you really like me, why didn't you tell me?" Why not let me be your girlfriend? "

A normal man who likes you will say, "well, you are my girlfriend, let's start dating now!" " "

This is the secret of finding a breakthrough and warming up the relationship when you are in a state of hot and cold.

How to deal with avoidant men

A friend is anxious, saying that the other party regards himself as a spare tire, and it is not hot or cold. Am I embarrassed to say this?

It's simple. If he really takes you as a spare tire, then you can get the final answer in a very simple way, so you don't have to guess and waste time on him in the future. Isn't that great?

Generally speaking, how do men who treat you as a spare tire answer this sentence?

They will argue with you, but they will not accept you anyway.

For example, it's the same example.

He said, "You are the most beautiful!"

You said, "I don't think I'm beautiful. I am beautiful, why don't you like me? "

He may just say to you, "Oh, we haven't known each other long. We need to know each other better! "

Or, he said, "Do you like me very much? What do you like about me? "

Knock on the blackboard! ! ! Many girls, at this time, the topic was taken away. Also hurriedly with somebody else to prove:

"I think we know a lot, and I like you very much! How do I like you ... "

You need to sound the alarm in your mind! They will use all kinds of reasonable reasons to change the subject. Some girls not only don't feel that the other person is hot and cold, but want to understand him more and take care of him more. It was completely taken away by the other party! ! ! !

You need to remember what your purpose is, stop chatting with his hot and cold rhythm and stick to your position.

This time! ! As long as he doesn't answer you, he will answer you directly! ! ! No matter what he says, you can reply to him. Looks like you just don't like me!

Never! Never! Don't let him take you away

Of course, if he doesn't pick you up at the end.

You will understand why he is hot and cold.