It is easier said than done, because two strangers can have a good chat in a few words, not just a nodding acquaintance; It's difficult because the so-called friends who have known each other for many years may quarrel with you for a few months or even less because of something that others think is a trivial matter, and eventually it will break up in discord, and everything that once happened will disappear.
It is enough to have a confidant in life, and friends are a great pleasure, but unconsciously, new friends are new year after year, and old friends are strangers. It should have been "clothes are not as good as new ones, people are not as good as old ones", but the reality seems to deviate from this point. Before a new dress was put on, an old friend drifted away and stopped contacting.
What makes close friends drift away?
First, it's too alienated. In today's advanced technology, the development of social software should make people communicate unimpeded, but the fact is more like this: more and more new people are known, and fewer and fewer old friends are contacted; I have time to see a bunch of people I don't know very well in Weibo, but I don't have time to make a phone call with my relatives and friends, let alone have a long talk; I am willing to spend my energy on online games, online shopping and browsing entertainment news, but I don't want to invite my friends out to see the changes in the streets.
Second, they are too close. It is said that "a friendship between gentlemen is as light as water", and friends should have a distance and be polite, which is the right way.
No matter what happens, if you overdo it, it will be a hidden danger and will cause great disaster one day.
Intimacy is really hard to control, but if you do the following things well, you will certainly be able to "keep" old friends.
This is actually the basis of interpersonal communication and a basic etiquette, which should be true for ordinary strangers or friends, let alone friends.
What is promised must be done, what is promised must be realized, and the agreed time must be observed.
If you think the other person is a friend, you can break your word, break your contract and be late. It's a big mistake to think that it's no big deal. The consequence of accumulating one by one once or twice is to become a person who doesn't value his friends.
It is often said that words are magical, which can soothe people like spring breeze and rain, and can also be turned into a sword, which hurts people invisibly.
Although everyone can speak, after all, no one is born to know how to read each other's hearts and say what they want to hear.
Silent company is worth a thousand words, and quiet listening is silent comfort.
Be friends, but don't ask each other what they don't want to say. Think about who doesn't have a skeleton in my closet.
Don't send a message and ask the other person where and who did what. You must ask clearly and care enough. Everyone is an independent individual, and nobody belongs to anyone. Everyone has their own social activities and different circle of friends.
Once the concern for friends is over-developed and possessive, kindness will become a boring burden.
Can a good friend really become "what is yours is mine, and what is mine is yours"? This is of course unrealistic.
It's true that as soon as we get on well, we like to say "take whatever you want" and "don't be polite to me". In my opinion, these are really polite words, so don't take them seriously.
Once you are really "impolite", go to a friend's house, rummage through things casually, take the food in the refrigerator and forget the money you borrowed-there is not much money, but do you really think that the other person said "forget it" because he didn't care? Just because the amount is not large or dragged into the "past years" and full of helpless compromises, it is difficult to ask for debts.
I'm afraid it's time to consider the direction of our relationship.
The relationship between people is mysterious, and you should "alienate" when you get closer, because the closer you get, the more cautious you are and the more you cherish it.
Although the distance between heart and heart is very close, we should be more polite and respectful in dealing with people, which is the key to make the intersecting love last forever.