I used to think that you can meet more people through dating software, which is an opportunity worth trying for singles who want to find someone. But through chatting on the software these days, I have a new understanding of online dating.
1. People who register dating software are mixed, and many people's purposes are not simple. Therefore, online dating must maintain a high degree of vigilance and anti-fraud ability, otherwise it is easy to be deceived.
Through the automatic matching function of this software, I matched a netizen. Click on the homepage and find that he is a sunny and handsome man with a well-proportioned figure. Out of love for his figure, I chatted with him.
He told me that he is now starting a business in Guangzhou and is thirty years old this year. I'm not very gregarious in my life. What I usually do is to read books and keep fit. Through chatting, I feel that he is a very calm and self-disciplined person, so I have a good impression on him.
So when he said it was inconvenient to chat on the software and asked me to add his WeChat friend, I agreed without much thought. In the next few days, he would chat with me at noon, and the number of chats increased, and we gradually got to know each other.
One night, he gave me a lesson about profit. At first, I didn't quite understand his meaning. I thought it was the statement of assets and income. Later, he explained that it was an alcohol investment platform. I immediately realized that he might be a liar, so I immediately deleted his WeChat. I looked back at his account information on the software, showing that the account was blocked because of violation.
In fact, what is even more frightening is the married men who are looking for excitement online. They have a complete family and even have a good relationship with their wives. However, if you are eager for novelty, you will still pretend to be an unmarried person and have sex everywhere online.
I chatted with a 32-year-old man. He confirmed that he was unmarried several times and told me that he had failed to find a suitable partner on many blind dates, and he was eager to get married by making friends online. At the beginning of the chat, he took the initiative to tell his basic situation and showed great sincerity.
So I had more frequent chats with him on the software. Although what he said when chatting with me was very warm-hearted, the content of each chat was to show the beauty of his work and life, but my situation was rarely asked. I gradually found that he was not the person I wanted, so I didn't want to have deeper contact with him. Finally, after I sent him a photo of Su Yan, he stopped talking to me.
I thought it was because the photos I sent made him stop talking, so I never took the initiative to find him again. A few days later, he even told me that the reason why he didn't chat with me was that he was married and couldn't bear to lie to me.
This kind of man lives a stable life and is relatively rich, so his sense of superiority expands and he feels that he has enough charm to conquer all women. They have gone through the whole process from love to marriage, and they can almost completely read women's minds. So, like an angler, he will gradually win the favor of women with sweet words and deliberately revealed wealth and knowledge, wait patiently for the opportunity, and finally deceive women into taking the bait. Not only will they not feel guilty about betraying their wives and possibly hurting other women, but they will also be shameless enough to be secretly proud of the cleverness of deception.
After the above two things, I feel that the love of people around 30 years old is no longer as simple as that of people around 20 years old. Whether online or in reality, girls should pay attention when deciding to start a relationship:
A man in his thirties who still says he won't get married must find out whether he is married or not if he wants to have further development with him. If he is careless for a moment, he may become the prey of married men looking for passion.
To form a correct view of marriage and love, sweet words sound good, but only by putting care into action is true love.
People need to be self-aware, and most of us can attract people of our own level. Therefore, ordinary people should not fantasize about attracting the attention of people with much better conditions than themselves. If there is, it is probably a hypothesis or a scam.
2. People you meet online may subvert your imagination of love and marriage at any time.
Matched many divorced men on the software. It turns out that many people really get married because they are too old to withstand the urging of their families. After marriage, their marriage could not continue because of personality or disagreement.
It's easier to find someone to marry than to find someone who has feelings for each other. But people still have to live a little more, and they can't shake their beliefs casually because of age and secular pressure.
Because life is our own, only we know how to live happily. Others may stimulate us in a few words, but they are not responsible for our happiness.
If we get married for the sake of getting married because we care too much about other people's ideas, one day if the marriage is unhappy, the bitter fruit we finally brewed can only be digested by ourselves, and no one who urged the marriage at the beginning can share it.
You will also meet another married man, who will tell you directly that he is married, but wants to find a "soul mate" online.
One of them is in his forties this year, and his wife has been with him since she was seventeen. Although he has a good relationship with his wife now and has never thought about divorce, he cheated on another woman in order to get the so-called passion.
These men do this because they are not satisfied with their existing sex life, or because their feelings with their wives are fading. Although I said I wouldn't get involved in the other family, I felt in place, and what happened after meeting naturally came naturally.
In their eyes, as long as they don't get divorced and support their families as usual, they are still "good" men who love their families, their wives and take responsibility.
I really can't understand their thoughts. Is the bottom line of marriage not loyalty, but just the responsibility of maintaining family integrity? And with the passage of time, love will gradually become cold, and you can't confide in the people next to you. You need to talk to strangers online?
As a single person, I don't know much about marriage, but I know I must marry someone with emotional foundation. An emotional marriage is still difficult to maintain. How can I expect people who have no feelings for themselves to hold hands with me for life?
From this point of view, even if you have a happy marriage, you can't take it as your whole life. You must build a world that belongs only to your spirit and career, because only in this way, even if you encounter marital changes, you will not be embarrassed and helpless.
Romain rolland said that the value of human beings lies in realizing the essence of life and still loving it. In fact, love and marriage are the same. It's not easy to find a person who loves each other for life, but we still have reason to believe and continue to pursue it.
Although online dating is risky, happiness will not wait. No matter the reality or the internet, we need to be brave in pursuing love at this age. I still believe that there will be love in the network, but I need to know how to distinguish good from bad and treat it more rationally. In any case, I hope that our older singles can find their own happiness as they wish.