What is mentality? Mentality is your fixed way, viewpoint, reference system or belief of looking at things.
For example, a parent mentioned that in her hometown of X Yang, in the 1990s, she grew up in a bad environment, with school violence and underworld. But why not leave such a city for the growth of children? The answer is that we are all the same. We are used to this environment and accept it. Maybe I think society is like this, and it's the same everywhere. This is a state of mind.
This book talks about the mentality of life. "The most popular life centers for teenagers include friends, materials, boyfriend/girlfriend schools, parents' sports, hobbies, heroes, enemies, self and work", "If your life is centered on them, it will be a mess".
Like focusing on friends. If all you have is to make friends and be accepted and welcomed by your friends, then you are likely to compromise on principles or standards in order to accommodate your friends. This reminds me of my brother's poor state this semester, and one of the biggest reasons is "focusing on friends." He regards his friends as "brothers" and may be happy. But later, the other party was not friendly to him, and my brother always endured it, still treating each other as brothers. In the end, I couldn't bear to break out, which was particularly sad. I feel that I am so kind to my friend, why should others treat him like this? "Make as many friends as possible, but never base your life entirely on friendship. Friendship is not strong."
So what should we pay attention to? The answer is "principle". Honesty, friendship, hard work, respect, gratitude, moderation, justice, integrity, loyalty and responsibility are all principles. Principles are like compasses, so that you won't deviate from the direction. Principles can also be the bottom line, boundary and standard for us to do things.
I remember my former boss once said that I was too principled for sales. Later, I learned to express euphemistically, without breaking the principle and serving customers well.
After reading this chapter, I began to consciously realize what is the principle of making some choices in my work and life. Then I know what way I should choose.