Someone once asked me, what thing does a person get in his life that has the most survival value and can affect the success or failure of your life?
Was it a good birth?
Or fame, money, status?
It is undeniable that a good birth will indeed give you more opportunities to win at the starting line;
Having fame, wealth, money, and status may also bring you rich opportunities. Material enjoyment and a comfortable life make you look brighter than others.
But these "gets" are all based on external conditions, and there is an element of luck in them, such as birth.
And things like money, fame, fortune and status are all superficial, like clouds in the sky, floating here and there, unpredictable and not solid.
Today’s brilliance does not mean that tomorrow will be dazzling?
I feel that the true value of a person in this world is to have excellent, kind, sincere qualities, and an inner spirit of struggle and improvement.
If you own these things, others cannot take them away.
And there should be three gains in life, which are the key to success or failure in your life.
The first lesson: keep calm.
I have seen a cartoon in which two people dig a well at the same time.
A man dug many wells of different depths, but in the end he still couldn’t dig out any water, so he left in frustration.
The other man dug patiently until he finally saw water and returned home satisfied.
Sometimes, it is not that there is no water source in those wells of different depths, but that the person who digs the wells has what kind of mentality he has during the process. Can he keep his composure?
If you are persistent and calm, you are more likely to succeed.
If you are impetuous and give up halfway, your efforts are mostly in vain.
I remember there is a sentence in "Laozi" that says: Qi is the spirit; when the Qi is calm, the mind will be calm, and when the mind is calm, it will be round.
I deeply agree.
In fact, the differences between people are not that big at first.
What makes the distance later is that some people can calm down and hold their breath, while others are easily irritable, lose their sense of proportion, cannot control their emotions, temper, and loneliness.
A person who is calm and calm can treat things rationally, analyze calmly, respond calmly, and make wise judgments whether it is studying, working, making friends, doing things, or living.
They will not be severely hit by a momentary setback, nor will they be disturbed by a sudden burst of emotions and panic. They can know how to control themselves and know how to stick to their goals and not relax.
Such a person will not become a slave to emotions, will not be led by negative energy, and will not become a passive misanthrope;
Instead, he will become a person who is focused on doing things. People who are positive are more likely to be happy and get opportunities.
The second best thing is to be able to bend down.
All mature rice knows how to bend down.
To judge whether a person is successful, it is not about how high he can reach, but how low he can squat?
To judge whether a person is superior, it is not to judge how much power, status, money he has, or how glorious his life is?
But it depends on how kind, sincere and compassionate he is towards others and other things.
It also depends on whether he has the ability to bend and stretch.
When a person reaches a certain age, what makes him stand out is no longer a competition based on his birth and appearance, but rather his temperament, upbringing, talent, ability and other comprehensive factors. It is a plus or minus for a person's success.
A person who can bend down is low-key and humble, open to all rivers. He will not be arrogant and arrogant just because he is successful;
A person who can bend down is mature. Wisdom, knowing how to advance and retreat, knowing propriety, gentleness and connotation, and temperament.
Those who are humble will not be afraid of criticism and setbacks. Even if they are at a low point, they will not be negative, decadent, self-defeating, or full of hostility.
He will always stand tenaciously in the wind like a tree, spreading his branches and leaves, welcoming the wind, rain and neon lights, and growing up;
He will always use the gentleness of clouds, To others and to oneself, it is long-lasting;
With the mind of the sea, it tolerates everything and forgives the harm.
The third lesson: Keep your head high
Nine times out of ten things will go wrong as you wish, and few people will have smooth sailing until old age.
There are always some people and things along the way that will hinder your growth and trap your body and mind.
It makes you feel anxious, confused and at a loss, making you feel powerless, scared and lonely, like a sapling blown down by the strong wind, trapped in adversity and unable to move forward.
People also tend to call these times the dark zone.
But later on, those who can ride the wind and waves, grow smoothly, reach the other side, and reap success and success must be those who know how to hold their heads up in the trough, adversity, and hesitation.
Those who can lift their heads, no matter how heavy the fog is in front of them, will work hard to break through the clouds and see the moon;
Those who can lift their heads, no matter how heavy the wind and rain are outside, or how heavy they have been. He will not admit defeat and bow his head despite the blow;
He will maintain a good attitude and move forward with his head held high in good times and bad times. He will proceed cautiously when the road is smooth, but he will be cautious when going through the thorny jungle. Bear the humiliation and pain, grit your teeth and persevere.
The real value of existence in this world is not the status, reputation and money you have, but whether you have excellent moral character and noble temperament.
Whoever has these "three gains" is the key to success.
Those are the skills for dealing with people that are in your bones. Others can’t take them away, and you don’t have to be afraid of losing them.
It is the capital to set sail and the power to ride the wind and waves when a person travels in the ocean of life.