The emergence of fear is related to past psychological feelings and personal experiences. As the saying goes, "once bitten, twice shy." Some comrades-in-arms have been tortured by some kind of * * * in the past, and a sense of excitement has formed in their minds. When they encounter the same scene again, the past will be aroused by experience, thus generating fear. Fear is also related to people's personality. Most people are shy and timid from childhood and unsociable when they grow up. Lonely and introverted people are prone to fear.
How do we overcome fear? Mainly by improving the cognitive ability of things, expanding the cognitive horizon and judging the source of fear. Understanding some laws of the objective world, understanding the relationship between people's own needs and objective laws, establishing correct goal judgment, improving foresight and making full mental preparations for possible changes will enhance psychological endurance. Secondly, we should cultivate optimistic interest in life and strong will, and inspire our courage with the brave and tenacious spirit of heroes by learning from their deeds. In the usual training and life, consciously temper yourself in a difficult environment and cultivate a brave and tenacious style. In this way, even if you are really in a dangerous situation, you will not panic for a while, but will be calm and resourceful. In addition, I usually take an active part in strengthening psychological training to improve various psychological qualities. For example, by simulating dangerous situations, setting various possible situations and carrying out targeted psychological training, negative emotions such as nervousness and anxiety can be effectively overcome, psychological adaptation and balance ability can be improved, confidence and courage can be enhanced, and fear can be overcome with fearless spirit.
In addition, fear can be overcome through self-regulation and self-training, and the specific methods are as follows:
Step 1: List all kinds of scenes that can make you nervous (the more specific the better, the more details), copy them to different cards, put the scenes that will not scare you the least at the front, put the scenes that scare you the most at the back, and arrange the cards in order.
Step 2: Do relaxation training. The method is to sit in a comfortable seat and take deep breaths regularly to relax the whole body. After relaxing, take out the first card in the above series and imagine the scene above. The more vivid you imagine, the better the image.
Step 3: If you feel a little uneasy, nervous and scared, stop imagining, take a deep breath and let yourself relax again. After completely relaxing, re-imagine the scene of failure just now. If anxiety and tension happen again, stop and relax, and so on, until the scene on the card doesn't make you uneasy and nervous anymore.
Step 4: Go on to the next scene (the next card) and make you more afraid in the same way. Note that every time you enter the imagination of the next card, you should take it as the standard that you no longer feel uneasy and nervous when you imagine the last card, otherwise you may not be able to enter the next stage.
Step 5: When you imagine the scene that scares you the most and you don't feel blushing, you can exercise on the spot in the order from light to heavy. If you feel uneasy and nervous at the scene, you can also take a deep breath and relax to fight it until you are no longer afraid and nervous.
Total * * * so much! The next step is up to you! Come on!
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How to solve the fear of making friends and how to get rid of adolescent social phobia
Social phobia is very common among teenagers. Mainly in the physical and psychological aspects.
Physiologically, nervousness is manifested as facial muscle stiffness and unnaturalness, involuntary trembling of some parts of the body, rapid heartbeat, sweaty palms and other symptoms; Psychologically, nervous people subjectively feel that others are staring at them, seeing their nervous performance, and even others are laughing at themselves in their hearts. At the same time, they will also have an escape mentality. In public, they will try to escape to a corner that will not be noticed, and try not to talk to reduce their tension. But as long as we understand it correctly, make up our minds to change it, and use scientific psychological principles and methods, we will definitely get out of this psychological cycle.
To overcome social tension, we should first pay attention to adjusting our mentality and establishing some good ideas:
(1) Accept yourself and build self-confidence.
Many people who are socially nervous are dissatisfied with themselves and have no confidence in themselves. Therefore, to change, we must first accept and accept ourselves in our hearts and establish confidence in ourselves.
(2) Don't ask too much of yourself.
Too much pursuit of perfection, too high demands on yourself, it is easy to be swayed by considerations of gain and loss, too concerned about what others think of you, and bent on getting recognition from others, thus losing yourself. Accept your status quo and don't care what others think. The more you are afraid of making mistakes, the more you will be at a loss.
(3) Don't care too much about your body reaction.
Nervousness is always accompanied by a series of physical discomfort. According to reinforcement theory, if we pay too much attention to the nervous reaction of some parts of the body when we are nervous, it is equivalent to strengthening our nervous behavior and making it worse step by step. However, when we don't care about our own nerve reaction, because the tension is not noticed and strengthened, the nerve reaction will gradually fade over time.
(4) face it bravely.
Nervous people often show escape psychology in social situations, fearing that they will make a fool of themselves and dare not face it. Actually, running away can't eliminate the tension. On the contrary, it will make you feel weak and blame yourself, which will make you more nervous next time. Besides, we can't escape forever. We live in this society and must associate with people. Sooner or later, we all have to face it.
The best way to overcome nervousness is to face it bravely! As a psychologist pointed out, "what we are afraid of is not the thing itself, but ourselves!" " The key is to see if you can beat yourself and take the first step bravely! Face it bravely!
With the above understanding, combined with some psychological principles and methods and skills, put the change into action:
1 Positive self-suggestion: Say to yourself 20 times every night before going to bed and after getting up in the morning, "I accept myself, I believe in myself!"
Through this positive self-psychological suggestion, we can gradually change our previous negative views on ourselves, learn to accept ourselves and cultivate self-confidence.
2 systematic desensitization training: it is impossible to change in one step, it is a gradual process, and you need to overcome your nervousness step by step.
First set yourself a series of behavioral goals, such as the tense communication scenes in the past 10, and then arrange them according to your own situation in order from easy to difficult. In this way, social practice training is carried out from easy to difficult, and each practice is very easy, so you can enter the next practice.
We should believe that human ability is gradually cultivated and developed through practice, and so is social ability.
3 mirror skills: spend 10 minutes every day, stand in front of the mirror, look into your own eyes in the mirror and say to yourself loudly: "I believe I can easily associate with others!" ""I believe I can change successfully! "Repeat this sentence many times, carefully understand the changes that have taken place in your heart, and feel whether you believe this sentence.
4. Relaxation and quiet training: Find a quiet place where no one will disturb you, sit comfortably, close your eyes and imagine yourself coming to a quiet place surrounded by green mountains and trees, and your mood will become peaceful. Now relax, imagine relaxing and softening from head, neck, arms, chest, abdomen, back, buttocks, thighs, calves and feet in turn ... At least once a day, regular exercises like this can help us control our bodies and overcome nervous reactions.
5. Read biographies of great men: Try to read biographies of some famous men and women, use their growth and successful experiences to motivate themselves and build up courage and confidence in change. At the same time, after reading the deeds of these great men, they can also play the role of idols, and we may potentially imitate some of their positive thoughts and behaviors (such as the biographies of Helen Keller, Lincoln, Ford, Nobel and Napoleon). ).
Learning interpersonal skills: consulting some magazines and books about interpersonal communication and eloquence skills, learning more about other people's interpersonal experience and improving our communicative ability will help us build confidence in communicating with others.
Social phobia can be overcome.
Xiaowen is an introverted girl who is not good at speaking in front of people, especially the opposite sex. She felt overwhelmed, flushed, her heart pounding and her voice trembling, which made her very uneasy. According to her parents' memories, Xiaowen was not like this before. She used to be lively and talkative, and all the adults in the dormitory liked her very much. I don't understand why I grew up like a different person.
It's all because of adolescence. When entering adolescence, boys and girls have strong self-esteem, are sensitive to external reactions, and care about other people's impressions and evaluations. Coupled with the expansion of social circles, more people know each other. I used to be unscrupulous at home, but now I am a little shy in the face of my peers, for fear that I will be looked down upon if I make a mistake. If you are in front of the opposite sex, you are more worried, so most of the time you are "silent" and seem very silent.
If we want to trace the family growth environment, we can say that girls are more controlled by their parents than boys. The girl's parents calmed her daughter down and acted like a girl. This undoubtedly increases the psychological barriers of girls in communication with others. They are afraid of leaving a bad impression on others, so they are timid and cautious, afraid of being teased for saying something wrong. This kind of psychology is much stronger for girls than for boys.
However, everyone has to go through the process of socialization, from family to society. Being too shy and introverted will hinder the development and perfection of personality and bring adverse effects on study and work.
In youth, many children often set too high demands and goals for themselves. If they fail to achieve their goals occasionally, they will easily feel inferior and be very sensitive to external reactions. This is normal. But if you overreact, you will be timid, affect communication, and gradually form self-isolation. This is harmful to the perfection of character. An important skill of modern people is to learn to get along and cooperate with others. Without interpersonal skills, it is difficult to achieve career success.
To overcome social phobia, we must first overcome ourselves. You know, no one is perfect, everyone has shortcomings. Don't exaggerate the advantages of others and enlarge your own shortcomings. You don't have to look up to others, you can be excellent as long as you work hard. Overcoming inferiority will increase your desire to communicate.
Secondly, it is important to bravely step out of the self-enclosed circle. Anything you do, you have a chance to do it well. Just like learning to swim, diving a few times is not so terrible. You can make a plan for yourself, first talk to familiar people, then step by step, and finally reach the level of talking to strangers. Usually, you can take the initiative to talk to your classmates and slowly cultivate your ability to express your views in public. If it is really difficult to do this, you can talk to the wall at home and imagine that there are countless listeners below in a public place. After a long and arduous psychological exercise, with the growth of age and the improvement of personality, social phobia can be gradually overcome.
How to solve the psychological fear of blushing? This is because the psychological quality is not good enough. As long as we can improve our psychological quality, we can solve the problem of being afraid of blushing and improve our psychological quality.
1, life is full of setbacks. We should exercise and grow in setbacks and grow in big winds and waves.
2. Don't think too absolutely. Think through multiple channels, and don't let absolute beliefs like "must" and "must" affect you. Zhuangzi said: "Misfortune lies in happiness, and happiness depends on misfortune." Look at the problem in two ways and discuss it in two ways.
When I am in trouble, I often miss others. If you only want personal interests, you will be swayed by considerations of gain and loss and be psychologically unbalanced; Those who value others, if they are selfless and broad-minded, they will be happy forever.
4. Make friends at ordinary times. No friends, unhappy, unhappy, no communication, no place to vent, what should I do? Cheerful people can communicate through multiple channels and improve their psychological endurance. Understanding others' greater misfortune through others' looking at themselves is a good way to treat their own misfortune.
How to solve the psychological problems of friends is obviously caused by emotions.
self-control
Then you can't hang out with others.
So others had better pay more attention.
How to solve the psychological problem of fear of death? Seek psychological help to solve it. According to what you described, your father is probably afraid of death, not just death, but everything related to death. Blood pressure is closely related to people's mental state. His thinking is always in a negative direction, constantly increasing pressure on himself and living in imagination. It is this way of thinking that led to his emotional ups and downs. I suggest you take him to the local authoritative hospital psychological institution, take medicine when necessary, and provide psychological consultation if possible, and he will come out slowly.
Disease analysis: Hello, according to your description, your father suffers from anxiety.
Suggestion: Carry out psychotherapy in time, keep a good attitude, don't think too much, cultivate more hobbies, let nature take its course and reduce stress. Don't be too superstitious.
How to solve psychological fear, introversion and communication barriers?
Afraid of failing in the exam, how to solve this psychological problem? No, good grades are good. If someone is really messing with you, you can tell your friends, teachers or police uncles.
How to solve my psychological problem? There is a saying that I don't know if everyone is familiar with it: "Everyone is equal". One thing in this world is the most precious-life! Do you agree? If you agree, please remember this sentence and remind yourself at any time that you have the most precious thing in the world. We compare life to a night pearl. Is the value of the night pearl determined by its packaging? Or will the value of this night pearl change when it is accidentally stained with some mud at some point? You have your own life, you are still young, and you have the opportunity to create your own glory, agree? ! If you believe you can, then as long as you don't violate morality and law, you have nothing to do and you have the right to strive for your happiness. The value of life is to serve others, the number of people served and the quality of service to measure people's value. No matter whether you read one book or two, what you learn is to serve others. I don't know if you have noticed that there are many people who haven't read a book or two, but he can also serve many people. There is a breakfast near me, and the boss is an old lady. She doesn't have much education, but her business is very good, serving many people and reflecting her social value. Bill Gates can become the richest man by giving up his books, so you'd better forget your books. It is most important to learn more practical skills.
Besides, I want to settle with you about you and the girl in your heart. Since we are friends, we want to further develop, right! As men, we don't take the initiative, but wait for girls to take the initiative. Are we lacking some manners? It's normal that you are worried about losing your present friendship, but let's think it over. If a girl likes you and tells you, you won't hate it even if you don't like it, and you won't stay away from others. But one thing can be believed, that is, if the other party, like you, does not take the initiative, then you will separate sooner or later, that is to say, you will have no further possibility. Secondly, I want to tell you that through my understanding of people, if she is good to you, at least she has a good impression on you. If a girl takes the initiative to be nice to a boy, nine times out of ten she likes you, and you are still wasting your time here. If the girl knows, she will be sad. I don't advise you to speak boldly, but I suggest you find a chance to express yourself like a gentleman (a gentleman is not cold in appearance and fragile in heart, but his appearance).
You don't have to tell a girl about your relationship, but you can get in touch with her more and do something with her, such as inviting her to a movie, eating, going to the park and so on. If she accepts you, she will naturally accept you as a boyfriend. Also, don't always feel inferior in front of girls, let them coax you. Men need strong sunshine to be liked by girls.
You didn't cheat or hurt anyone. What can't be expressed sincerely? I've told you everything I need to tell you, and I've analyzed everything I need to analyze. How to act is up to you! If you get the happiness you deserve, don't forget to tell me. Let me be happy with you. Thank you.
Find friends and solve psychological problems. Why? Have a good rest, it's no use taking medicine when you are in a bad mood! Maybe it's too much pressure, Ps. I'm from Harbin, too, and Dacheng Street belongs to Linda!