10 Basic "Notes" indispensable for communication.
I. Equality
Everyone living in reality, regardless of position, knowledge, gender, personality is equal. Therefore, in humans,
In international communication, you must never raise yourself one inch and lower others one foot, and deliberately "cross the wall" with each other and say goodbye.
People have a feeling of "keeping people away". To oppress others with power, to oppress others with power, and to bully the weak and fear the hard in communication will make you think highly of yourself.
First of all, it is impossible to treat others as worthless and to have equal and harmonious interpersonal relationships.
Second, respect
Longing for respect is everyone's basic psychological need. In interpersonal communication, we treat all people, regardless of their status.
Due respect should be given. We should not only respect other people's personality, personality habits, power status and emotional interests.
And respect each other's explicit or internal psychological distance, and don't easily break through or destroy it, otherwise it's right.
Rudeness will inevitably arouse the vigilance, disgust and alienation of the other party.
Self-esteem is the most sensitive corner of a person's mind. Once a person's self-esteem is bruised, he will fight with ten times madness and one hundred times strength.
You fight. In fact, it is not difficult to respect others. Sometimes all you need is a smile, a greeting, a respectful address, a pair of listening ears, and a friend.
A mouth that spreads gossip without asking questions will bring sunshine and warmth to others' mood, and of course it will also bring sincere friends to yourself.
Friendship and harmonious communication.
Third, communication.
Bai, a famous host of CCTV, once said: "Every life needs confession." Then, what comes with confession is interpersonal relationship.
The communication between them. Only through communication can others understand themselves and others at the same time; Only through communication can we constantly improve each other.
Understand, so as to reduce or avoid some unnecessary misunderstandings and frictions. The more you don't communicate, the more you deliberately defend yourself, the harder it is for others to do it.
Fusion. Communication requires initiative, blindly waiting for others to communicate with themselves, and can't wait for "good popularity". Being able to communicate does not mean being able to communicate and being good at communicating.
Learners know that different communication methods are adopted according to different objects and occasions, and that "what mountains to go to and what songs to sing" communication always follows eloquence.
Close contact can pave the way for your communication and help you write a harmonious chapter in your communication.
Fourth, tolerance.
There are no two identical leaves and no two identical people. As the saying goes, "the ruler is shorter, the inch is longer", and people's personality,
There is a specialization in the art, and it is impossible to insist on consistency in dealing with interpersonal relationships. If people want to live in harmony, they must seek common ground while reserving differences, understand each other, and do not ask for much.
A broad mind full of blame. Since we are not perfect, how can we expect others to be perfect? We treat him in interpersonal communication.
Don't ask too much, don't force others, but be able to accommodate people at the right time and at the right time. It is human nature to make mistakes. once
We shouldn't dislike each other's mistakes. We should provide him with relaxed conditions, forgive others' mistakes and help others correct them. "
A hundred rivers are full of tolerance. As the old saying goes, "Clear water means no fish, while clear people mean no friends." People always like it in their work and life.
Make friends with tolerant and kind people, as the saying goes, "tolerance will win many people."
Verb (abbreviation of verb) appreciation
It is a psychological need to hope for others' attention and affirmation, and appreciation is a way of communication to meet this need.
Carnegie, a master of interpersonal relationships, said, "The way to avoid hating others is to find out their shortcomings." Therefore, we should be happy in our communication.
Treat everyone with a rewarding attitude, always pay attention to the people and things around you, and discover the advantages and strengths of others. Praise is a direct expression of appreciation.
There is a saying that "a kind word warms three winters", and a sincere compliment can often bring good mood to others and yourself. Learn to find the good in others.
And sincerely praise it, which is a "lubricant" to promote interpersonal harmony.
Sixth, transposition
In real life, we are always used to interacting with people from our own subjective judgment, which often leads to some misunderstandings. So,
To achieve mutual recognition and understanding and avoid misunderstanding and prejudice, we must learn to put ourselves in the other's shoes. The so-called "exchange meeting", as the saying goes "
Sitting on the bench is to be good at understanding each other's thoughts, feeling each other's feelings, and finding each other to deal with problems from each other's perspective and situation. "
Personality style. Only by putting yourself in others' shoes can we understand others to the greatest extent, so as to find the best way to get along and solve problems.
The correct way to solve the problem. Confucius said, "Don't do to others what you don't want them to do to you", which means don't do to others what you don't want them to do to you.
That's the truth. As a philosopher said, "Treat others as you want them to treat you." Therefore, payment
As long as there is less self-righteousness and more empathy, there will be less misunderstanding and friction and more understanding and harmony.
VII. Flexibility
There may be many reasons for a person's disharmony in interpersonal relationship, among which the communication style is often too rigid and leaves no room. because
Therefore, we need to establish an "elastic isolation belt" in communication, so that ourselves, the other party and even both parties can gain more room for manoeuvre, thus
Reduce or avoid some unnecessary friction or injury. For example, when you promise others, don't always be so eloquent. Once you're objective,
If the reason cannot be fulfilled, it will not give the other party the impression of "keeping promises"; When rejecting others, don't always give them a blunt rejection, you might as well.
Promise to think about it first, leave yourself some room for manoeuvre, and then you can "advance and retreat"; When criticizing others, don't just shout.
Voice, if it is in public, it is best to stop and take care of each other's self-esteem; When arguing with others, don't say anything casually.
"Talking too much" and "talking too rudely" will not only seriously hurt each other's feelings, but also make it difficult for both sides to "step down"; When asking for help
Don't directly ask the other person to do what you ask. Once something is not done or the other party is powerless, it will inevitably lead to an embarrassing deadlock, and so on. big
Quantitative practice shows that adding some flexibility to your communication and leaving some room for yourself and others will help to make interpersonal relationships more harmonious.
Eight, integrity
Confucius said, "People without faith don't know what they can do." Honesty is an invisible "business card", which is related to a person's sentence and quality. In real life
Many people "put money first", don't talk about honesty, and even dare to cheat their relatives and friends, which makes the credibility between people decrease and become serious.
It destroys the harmony between people. In the face of the lack of integrity, it is not enough to just call. Each of us is building an honest building.
Brick by brick, we need to start from ourselves and start from the little things around us, such as: don't break your promise to others and ask others for our things, I.
Once you agree, you should do your best. If it cannot be completed due to objective reasons, it should be explained clearly to others to gain their understanding; ask
Be as real as possible and don't always associate with people wearing masks. Don't hold "there are no eternal friends, only forever."
The idea of "making friends from afar" communicates with people with the mentality of "using" and even makes a despicable move of "kicking down the bridge"; Of course, guard against people's heart
You don't have to, but you don't have to be guarded everywhere. You always look at people with suspicion. You know, suspicion is the reef of interpersonal relationships. As long as each of us
Everyone abides by honesty with their own practical actions, and believes that the fire of honesty will surely start a prairie fire. Then why can't we establish harmonious interpersonal relationships?
Nine. cooperate
In today's society, the competition between people is becoming increasingly fierce, but this does not mean that cooperation has become dispensable. On the contrary, with the social division of labor
With the increase in the proportion of refined and intelligent components in the work content, many tasks are no longer completed by individual strength, but by teamwork. one
Even if an individual is a "good iron", how many "nails" can he hit at most? Therefore, cooperation is the basic principle of interpersonal communication.
A sociable person must be a cooperative person. Competition based on cooperation and cooperation based on competition are the basic states of interpersonal communication.
Potential. If we only talk about competition without cooperation, then competition will be vicious and disorderly by hook or by crook, and the harmony of interpersonal relationships will be out of the question.
Tell me. Therefore, in interpersonal communication, we should support each other more and destroy each other less; Consult more and be less stubborn; Duoyaogou
Turn off, turn off less. Only in this way can our interpersonal relationship be less tense and frictional, and more warm and harmonious.
X. interaction
In real life, there will be discordant notes in the relationship between people, resulting in some contradictions and frictions, one of which is with one side.
Damaged interests. Therefore, in order to effectively solve contradictions and eliminate frictions, we should not be too selfish and "eat alone", but should adhere to "reciprocity"
, the pursuit of "win-win". For example, in the communication mentality, don't just want to be happy, don't make others uncomfortable, and don't take killing each other as the last priority.
Fast; When considering a problem, you can't just think for yourself and not for others, just consider the immediate interests and not the long-term interests; In the eyes of both parties, there is no.
When reunification is possible, we can jump out of the "mindset" and seek compromise; If there is any interest dispute, both parties should sit down and negotiate sincerely. If necessary,
We might as well make some compromises. To achieve harmony in interpersonal relationships, we must maintain a certain balance, and any good relationship will benefit both sides.
If one party is damaged for a long time, this relationship will not last long. In communication, as long as we are willing to take a step back and give each other face.
That's enough. If you are willing to leave some flexibility on your bottom line, share with communication and interests, and strive for development, then you will be able to achieve the best communication.
Effect, also can make interpersonal relationship more harmonious.
"The present is composed of the past, and the future must also be composed of the present. My friend, I want to bless you forever:
I wish you a bright future and a happy life! -Zhesi! "