Now many parents are only children, but their childhood life is still relatively happy. An alley, a few playmates, sometimes noisy, sometimes playing tricks, in retrospect, I don't feel lonely. But children are different now. Apart from playing with children in kindergarten, it is hardly "wild" outside. However, when children grow up, will they still have childhood memories like ours?
Lack of playmates also affects children's personality, but to change this situation, we must rely on the support of parents and the joint efforts of * * * *.
In Chengdu, there are so many open-minded and cheerful parents who set up "little friends" clubs for their children and play happily with their little friends. Because what they want most is that their children can have a happy personality.
Zhou Zhou's mother: Several parents hit it off immediately.
"On my daughter Zhou Zhou's first day in kindergarten, I waited for Zhou Zhou to leave school at the kindergarten gate and chatted with several parents who also came to pick up the children. We find that children nowadays have some' difficulties in making friends' and will not associate with their peers. When I was young, my parents were only worried about playing too crazy with my friends, and never worried that we didn't know how to' play' with our children. Now, there is such a baby at home. Even if parents are properly educated, children still lack opportunities to get along with their peers. Adults want to make way for their children and generally don't care about them, so children rarely know what' equality' is at home. At the same time, we all find that although children often quarrel with friends, they are actually willing to play with their peers. The parents of our children talked about this topic and found that everyone was very knowledgeable. After chatting for a while, it happened that all the children were studying in small classes in kindergarten. So every time I pick up my children from school, it becomes a discussion meeting for parents. The more you talk about it, the more speculative it is, and the idea of setting up a' club' to help children make friends, so that they can play together on weekends or at ordinary times to make up for the regret that children have no brothers and sisters. "
"At the beginning of the establishment of this club, our parents' wishes were primitive, that is, they hoped that their children would have more opportunities to learn how to get along with their peers on an equal footing, and at the same time enjoy playing with friends. "
Expert review
The purpose of establishing a community is to help children create an environment for making friends, so that children can learn many skills that they can't learn at ordinary times in their interaction with their partners. Most children are happy to get along with their peers. If you don't have the conditions to set up a "club" for your child, at least you can often lead your child to visit relatives, friends, neighbors and colleagues and let your child play with his peers. You can also invite your friends to your own home. Parents can provide a playground at home, buy some books and toys, and organize their children to play games and activities together. Parents should let their children enjoy playing with friends as soon as possible.
Linlin's mother: It's different.
"The way we carry out our activities is very diverse. As small as a mother taking her child to another child's house, as big as 10, family members travel to Xichang Satellite City by train and so on. For children's birthdays, we will also arrange a simple and warm party, either at home or at KFC or McDonald's. It won't be extravagant anyway, but we want the children to have fun.
"The content of each activity is different. Generally speaking, children are allowed to play games by themselves, and sometimes adults can give some small reminders; There are also games in which adults and children participate, such as parcel delivery performances. "
Expert review
Parents should actively create conditions for children to play with their peers, and clubs will provide children with time, space, partners and so on. In game communication, adults should not be the "judges" of children's disputes. It is better to let them find a way to solve it themselves and learn from it to adjust their behavior. Parents should encourage their children to play role games, because in the process of playing different roles, children can not only master social behavior norms and gradually get rid of the consciousness of "self-centeredness", but also learn the communication methods between different roles: dolls and elders, doctors and patients, salespeople and customers. And gain group consciousness and cooperation spirit in the game.
Little mother: Don't make a fuss when children quarrel.
"It is common for children to quarrel and bicker, but the attitude we adopt is generally' no matter' and let the children solve it themselves. We parents should treat our children with a normal heart, don't make a fuss, and protect them, which is actually harmful to them. Nowadays, children quarrel mostly because they can't share. But it is not easy for such a young child to learn to share. Must be taught in daily life.
"Last time, Yun Yun and his mother came to our house. Originally, two girls were very happy to play with Barbie dolls, but they fell out because of a Barbie skirt. Both little girls began to cry, and my head was swollen with tears. It suddenly occurred to me that Mix's favorite cartoon "Monkey King" said on DVD, "Those who don't play with skirts can watch cartoons". Mix didn't argue about playing with skirts and ran to watch TV in tears.
Expert review
It is inevitable that children will bicker and quarrel together, even if they are good friends. When there is a quarrel between children, the mother must keep a calm attitude, don't break into a furious rage or terminate the communication between children, but take persuasion to ease it, and never take sides with one side. If you find a way to distract your child like this mother, that's not bad.
Mao Mao's dad: When he hits a wall, he will naturally change.
"In fact, if there is any immediate change, it is impossible. The club has been established for three years, and many children in small classes in kindergartens are now in primary schools. Unconsciously, every child has changed more or less. Take my son Mao Mao as an example. He used to be self-centered and do whatever he wanted, regardless of others. When he first participated in the activities organized by the club, he often ran into a wall with his friends, and even was "isolated" by everyone once. He was very sad about it. No matter how I educated before, the effect was not great. After attending the club activities, as long as I say that you are worse, I won't take you to play with the child, and he will restrain a lot and pay attention to it in the next activities. I usually don't lecture him in public, and I reason with him calmly every time I go home. Now, Mao Mao is much wiser than three years ago. Grandparents said it was because they grew up. In fact, I know that this has a lot to do with the activities of the club. "
Cheng Cheng's mother: He followed at first.
"The success of my family is another situation. Not only is it not overbearing, but it is afraid to play with children. I was puzzled before, because Cheng Cheng has a glib tongue at home, why he is so timid outside. We have no other choice but to encourage Cheng Cheng to play with his friends. At first, he always ran after the children. Later, he was completely integrated into the children. Last time I saw them playing the game of' war', he was a small leader. "
Expert review
Some children with strong self-awareness will talk impolitely, don't listen to adults, and are easily disgusted by their partners and don't want to associate with them. If parents only verbally regulate their children's behavior and tell them what to do and what not to do in making friends, the effect is not as useful as that of children encountering problems and solving them in actual communication. In fact, children of any personality will change among their peers.
Because these parents all work in different positions, according to each person's strengths and advantages, they hold different positions-external relations department, transportation department, reading department and food department. It's really lively. It can be seen that this seemingly simple community really didn't let parents pay less attention.