First, there is understanding. Correct attitude is the key to solve the phenomenon of puppy love. Educator Bubel said: "When educators win the trust of students, students' aversion to receiving education will be overcome and give way to a strange situation: he regards educators as close people. "Therefore, teachers should first establish a trustworthy image in students' minds, and the key to education is to correct educators' own attitude towards students' puppy love. The yearning for the opposite sex is a normal physiological reaction and sexual psychological phenomenon in adolescence, and it is a beautiful and precious content in people's emotional world. Teachers should treat students' emotional problems objectively and calmly. Don't make a fuss about the communication between boys and girls, and don't lash out at puppy love as "heinous". We should be patient and tolerant. Only in this way can we close the distance with students and improve the ability of middle school students to understand and grasp emotions, which is the fundamental way to solve the problem of puppy love. In a diary, two students with good academic performance in the class told me such a thing directly and asked me to give them advice. One of the girls said that a boy said he liked her, and she didn't know what it was like, and now she doesn't know how to reply to each other. The other is a boy. He said that a girl wrote to him, saying that she liked him very much and wanted to be friends with him. He asked me what to do. This beats my class teacher. It also dawned on me that these children are in the mature stage of youth development, and they have a mysterious and hazy affection for the opposite sex students, which can easily lead to puppy love, so being a class teacher can not be ignored. Of course, students generally don't take the initiative to tell their teachers these things. Even if there is such a thing, it is difficult for the teacher to make them admit the truth. But now these two students beg me to make up my mind. It makes me happy and embarrassed. I am glad that the students trust me so much that even the biggest "privacy" is willing to let the teacher know. The tricky thing is that if such things are not handled well, it will affect students' lives. After thinking about it for several days, I just can't find a way to feel particularly good. In my diary, I asked two students to tell each other that they should be good friends, help each other in school, compete with each other and make progress together. At that time, even I thought the sermon looked pale, and it was hard to believe that it would have any effect. But I didn't expect this effect to be good. Both students said my suggestion was good, and they did as I said. After a while, I asked two other students in my diary, and the result made me feel very satisfied. Not only did they not affect their studies, but they also maintained a friendly relationship. After handling this matter, I realized that I must understand and give students the necessary and correct education and guidance in this respect, so that students in the class can correctly understand and handle the relationship between boys and girls.
Second, be tolerant. Take the strategy of "one of our own". Communicate with students more, especially girls, whose emotions are delicate and sensitive, rich and fragile, and their psychology is subtle and complicated. Therefore, in psychological counseling, teachers should not only have rich knowledge of psychology, physiology and law, but also have sincere love, respect and understand students, sympathize with their misfortunes, treat students as their own, rather than the object of discipline, and always pay attention to "self-effect", so that students can truly feel that teachers are their intimate people, which can help them solve difficulties, make students really like you, eliminate students' wariness of teachers, and draw closer between teachers and students. American social psychologists David and Libitz once conducted a survey to understand the role of parents in intervening in men's and women's love. They were surprised to find that the higher the degree of parental intervention, the stronger the love between men and women. They named this phenomenon "Romeo and Juliet effect". This "effect" is not only manifested in the influence of parents' interference on children's love concept, but also in the negative influence of educators' rude behavior on students' puppy love and other behaviors. Therefore, from the perspective of pedagogy and psychology, in addition to ideological education, we should educate them to establish lofty ideals and beliefs and cultivate correct outlook on life, values, aesthetics and morality, and also strengthen psychological counseling, carry out mental health education and enhance students' self-control ability. To prevent middle school students from puppy love, we should also strengthen emotional education and guide middle school students to understand: what is love? What is the true meaning of love? Why middle school students are not suitable for dating? What should I do if I am pursued? How to associate with the opposite sex? Wait, help them establish a correct view of love and making friends. Keep a secret from those students who are discovered by me and are afraid of being embarrassed by other students and teachers. This experience came from similar cases when I was a class teacher in a primary school. When I was in primary school, by chance, I saw her letter to a male classmate. Everything in the letter tells me that this girl has a tendency of puppy love. I didn't say anything at that time, just holding the unfinished letter. When I was thinking about how to deal with this matter, she took the initiative to find me and cried and assured me that she would study hard in the future and would not make such a mistake again. Maybe she was caught. I only told her that I hope she can concentrate on her studies, because she is smart and it is right to think when she grows up. I also promised her that I would never tell anyone about it as if it had never happened. This girl is in the third grade this year. She has seen her many times in the school corridor. She greeted me with great excitement and sometimes asked me about my health and work. Feels like her own daughter. I have also asked her teacher many times that her grades have been very good, but her grades in primary school are not outstanding. This semester, I also met such a girl and stumbled upon his letter to other boys. In order not to embarrass her after others found out, I put my suggestions and hopes in her exercise book in the form of a note and sent it to her personally. A few days later, she thanked me for my tolerance and education in her diary, saying that she must handle the relationship with her classmates and devote herself to her study.
Third, the bridge of communication. Talking in the diary allows students to express their psychological confusion in time, which can suit the remedy to the case and prevent delay. A girl in the class has asked me to sit at the same table with another male classmate three times, saying that she can't get along with her present deskmate, but that boy is very naughty. Few female students are willing to sit at his desk, and three female students have already changed. Now this has complained to me several times and doesn't want to sit at his desk. After repeated education, this boy is stubborn and difficult to change. Who knows how good and kind this girl says he is. This male classmate also wants to sit at the same table with her, and said that he must get along well and help each other at school. So I made a "match" between them through my diary and made a "military order": I can't go beyond the boundaries of my classmates, and my academic performance can only go in and not go back. Both of them made promises in their diaries. So an agreement was reached. It's been three weeks, and the two children really mean what they say.
Fourth, the strategy of setting an example. The strategies of "model education" and "self-education" can be adopted. Many class teachers feel that a good class group is a huge educational force and plays an important role in students' psychological development. Many experienced middle school class teachers attach importance to the power of example in the practice of maintaining a good collective atmosphere, and insist on setting up advanced models around them as the intervention point of class collective construction, so that students can learn from them. When dealing with the phenomenon of puppy love among middle school students, the class teacher can also play the role of example education. By setting an example and learning advanced, let girls know what is the beauty and pursuit of middle school students, so as to purify their hearts and master the discretion of getting along with students of the opposite sex and not turn friendship of the opposite sex into love. Suhomlinski said that "real education can only be achieved when students have the requirements of self-education" and "real education can only be achieved by promoting students' self-education". When dealing with puppy love, we should fully guide and mobilize students' subjective initiative, and consciously accept positive and scientific views on love, friendship and morality through self-reflection, self-warning and self-tracing, so as to overcome negative and wrong thoughts and behaviors.
Fifth, skillfully cooperate with family education. The tendency of children's puppy love is a sensitive topic for parents. In order to achieve the ideal educational effect, parents must cooperate. How to achieve a good educational effect without expanding the problem, the class teacher should adopt correct and ingenious strategies, such as letting parents often communicate with their children the meaning and methods of making friends, paying attention to their children's changes at ordinary times, teaching their children to do some housework at weekends, letting them know the meaning of family life and enhancing their sense of family responsibility; Parents are also required to tell their children about the relationship between love, marriage and family with their own personal experiences, so that children can realize the influence of puppy love on life and help them establish correct values.
To sum up, the problem of puppy love among middle school students is not terrible. The terrible thing is that we have not treated these problems correctly and guided them correctly. I think we should treat the problem of puppy love among middle school students with an understanding attitude, always be tolerant, build a bridge of communication, skillfully set an example, be patient and tolerant, reasonably guide them, and combine the characteristics of their psychological development to carry out scientific adolescent education and continuously improve the quality of this education. Only by improving middle school students' ability to understand and grasp emotions is the fundamental way to solve the problem of puppy love.