(1) Choose the seat in front to sit
Are you Have you noticed how the seats in the back row are filled first during various gatherings in teaching or classroom? Most people occupying the back seats hope that they will not be "too conspicuous". And the reason they are afraid of being noticed is because they lack confidence.
Sitting in the front builds confidence. Try it as a rule and sit as far forward as possible from now on. Of course, sitting in the front will be more conspicuous, but remember, everything about success is conspicuous.
(2) Practice looking at others squarely
A person’s eyes can reveal a lot of information about him. When someone doesn't look at you, you will intuitively ask yourself: "What are you trying to hide? What is he afraid of? Will he be bad for me?"
Not looking at others usually means: I feel inferior next to you; I feel inferior to you; I am afraid of you. Avoiding other people's eyes means: I feel guilty; I have done or thought of something that I don't want you to know; I am afraid that you will see through me as soon as I touch your eyes. This is all bad information.
Looking squarely at others means telling you: I am honest and aboveboard. I believe what I tell you is true and I have no guilt whatsoever.
(3) Increase your walking speed by 25
When David Schwartz was a teenager, it was great fun to go to the center of town. After finishing all the errands and getting into the car, my mother would often say, "David, let's sit for a while and look at the people passing by."
My mother was a wonderful observer. She would say, "Look at that guy, what do you think is bothering him?" or "What do you think the lady over there is going to do?" or "Look at that guy, he seems a little lost."
It's really fun to watch people walking. It's much cheaper and more enlightening than going to the movies.
Many psychologists associate slouching and slow walking with unpleasant feelings about yourself, your work, and others. But psychologists also tell us that by changing posture and speed, we can change our mental state. If you observe carefully, you will find that the movements of the body are the result of the activities of the mind. Those who have been beaten down and ostracized often drag their feet and have no self-confidence at all.
Ordinary people walk like "ordinary people" and confess "I'm not very proud of myself."
Another type of person shows extraordinary confidence and walks faster than ordinary people, like running. Their pace tells the whole world: "I'm going to an important place, doing something important, and more importantly, I'm going to succeed in 15 minutes."
Use this "walk fast" 25” technique, hold your head high and walk faster, and you will feel your confidence growing.
(4) Practice speaking in public
Napoleon Hill pointed out that there are many people with sharp ideas and high talents, but they are unable to use their strengths to participate in discussions. It’s not that they don’t want to participate, it’s just that they lack confidence.
People who are taciturn in meetings think: "My opinion may not be valuable. If I speak it out, others may feel stupid. It's better for me not to say anything. Moreover, others may be better than others." I know better, and I don't want you to know that I am so ignorant." These people often make very vague promises to themselves: "I will speak up next time," but they know very well that they cannot fulfill this promise. Every time the taciturn person does not speak, he is poisoned by a lack of confidence, and he loses it more and more. From a positive perspective, if you try to speak up, you will gain confidence and make it easier to speak up next time. Therefore, speak more. This is the "vitamin" of confidence.
The author of "On the Nature of Things" is the great ancient Roman poet Lucretius. He advised people all over the world to praise dark-skinned women, saying: "Your complexion is as charming as a walnut." If you continue to praise the other person in this way, then the woman will not care even if she looks in the mirror to dress her makeup again and again, or even if she knows that her skin is dark. This way, she can concentrate on her makeup and always feel like an attractive woman.
Then Lucretius advised us to change the word "skinny" to "lovely antelope" and "chattering" to "eloquent talent". Different languages ??can completely change the same facts and give people different psychological feelings.
In short, using positive or negative words can describe the same fact with completely different results. It can be seen that in the matter of wording, he is indeed a magician unmatched by any genius. In any case, as long as valuable wording or narrative methods are often used, the same fact can be completely changed, of course, the feeling of inferiority will be eliminated, and people can enjoy a pleasant life.
(8) Confidence cultivates self-confidence
If you keep doing things that seem to lack self-confidence when you lack self-confidence, you will become less and less confident.
When you lack confidence, you should do something confident. When you lack confidence, instead of telling yourself that you have no confidence, tell yourself that you are very confident. In order to overcome a negative and negative attitude, we should try to adopt a positive and affirmative attitude. If you think you can't do it and ignore the things around you, the situation will gradually become what you think. There is a certain student group that advocates that college students select the most modern and beautiful college student every year and hold a competition. Here's what the staff there said. When they go to universities or on the streets and see beautiful people, they show them brochures and invite them to participate in this competition. From local to central level, various competitions are held again and again. However, everyone is becoming more and more beautiful, which is almost invisible. The staff there said: "Maybe I am becoming more and more confident!" This is absolutely correct. Because the positive attitude of "I want to participate in this competition" makes these people look so beautiful. This life-affirming attitude of "I'm in this game" generates confidence and makes these people appear more beautiful. There is a saying in Denmark: "Even if good luck comes, a fool knows how to invite it in." If you have a negative and negative attitude, even if good luck knocks on your door, you will not invite it in. When the opportunity comes, you should put aside your negative and negative attitude. Luck not only comes from the outside, but also from the heart. "Don't say mean words all day today." These things may seem easy, but they are not. But if you put your mind to it, you can do it. If you can express a smile in your voice, your life will become brighter day by day. Because if you have a friendly smile in your voice, people will want to talk to you and be energized by the human contact. When talking on the phone, if you speak in a smiling voice, the other party will feel comfortable listening to you, and you will also feel happy. Having a sad face or speaking coldly will not only make the other person uncomfortable, but will also make you unhappy. When you use words to conflict with the other party, you are using words to conflict with yourself. Your attitude towards the other party is also your attitude towards yourself. We should build them one by one like bricks, piling up our positive and affirmative attitude towards life. Even if you can't like everyone, you should still try to like one more person. If you like someone, you will also like yourself, and then you will overcome unnecessary fear of others. Because, self-confidence breeds self-confidence. A small achievement will bring us confidence. If you immediately want to do great and extraordinary things, you will become less and less confident.
(9) Do what you can do
When you do what you can do, your personality will emerge. The important thing is that instead of trying to fix your image, find what you can do now. By knowing what you should do and then doing it, you can be liberated from your own image. In short, try to write down what you can do immediately, and then practice it. It does not have to be a great or extraordinary action, as long as it is something within your ability.
Because we just want to reach the sky in one step, we can’t find anything to do. "Today's work is done today." The work that can be done easily today will become very heavy if left until the next day. If you think "How annoying!" and leave it until the next day, the work will become relatively heavier. If you put off what you can do today until the next day, those delayed tasks will increase your burden. I have never met anyone who said: "I will quit smoking from tomorrow!" and quit smoking. I have never met anyone who quit drinking by saying, “That’s it for tonight’s drinking!” The following is a short story from a photographer. Once, the photographer attended a party. On the way to the reception, the photographer said: "I quit drinking" and asked him: "When did you start?" He replied: "I just decided to quit." He quit smoking and drinking. Most people will answer: "After this cocktail party" or "This cocktail party will be the last one." "Forever" is also accumulated hour by hour, because if you take away one hour, there will be no forever. Try making two cards, one that says "Go ahead!" and the other that says "Do it later." Keep these two cards with you and when you feel less confident, pull out one of them. At this time, the one that says "Go ahead!" should be drawn. We can first write "Be confident" on the back. Always pull out this card when you don't know whether to do something. Because today is related to the next day, if you don’t do what you can do today, it will become more difficult to do it tomorrow.
When running a marathon, because the body will be tired, we cannot be more motivated every time we pass a telephone pole. However, as long as it is not entirely physical exertion, achieving goals one after another will give people more motivation. Therefore, the big goal should be divided into several small stages to achieve it. Every time a stage is reached, new motivation will be generated. This will then create the motivation needed to reach your ultimate goal. Thinking to myself: "It must be difficult!" People who fall into depression are succumbed to their goals from the beginning. Moreover, these people will set a goal that they cannot achieve, which shows that their hearts have been twisted. A healthy soul will yearn for what it can do. A person who is mentally immature will constantly adopt a very self-centered attitude. With this type of expression, once a self-centered person sets a goal, it must be the goal that immediately attracts everyone's attention. Then, because he is obsessed with that goal, he loses sight of what he should be doing here and now, and ends up going alone. , unconventional. People who like to be unconventional when they are young tend to live in depression when they get older. This is the reason. When you are young, you are unable to overcome your self-expression and self-centered personality. When you get older, you become depressed. There is a saying: "As the wild geese fly, the turtle also stomps its feet." That is to say, people who "can't find what they want to do" don't do things like the turtle in this sentence? Suppose the turtle sees the wild geese flying across the sky and he Wouldn't it be weird to want to fly too? There should be things that turtles can do but geese can't. ··@@@@@@@@First of all, we need to clarify some facts:
1. Today’s society is a mixed bag of good and bad, and some people are outright villains. In this social environment, the more honest people are, the more they are despised and the easier they are to be bullied.
2. Many people are very powerful, and there are also a large group of people who use people to face the front rather than people to face the back. In this kind of environment, introverted people often make people feel that they are not easy to approach, so it is not easy to find out what you have. ’s shining point.
3. Although you can't be bullied, you can't become a villain or snobbish. That will degrade your own soul and make it unworthy. In this world, it is not necessarily a tooth for a tooth or an eye for an eye. A more gentlemanly approach may yield better results.
The following are some of my suggestions:
1. The period from nineteen to twenty-four is recognized as the most energetic period for a person. Since you are at this stage If you are not satisfied with your job, you can quit the job. What you said on the second floor is right. In fact, we don’t support relatives working together. Men who stand upright should rely on themselves. Don’t let them feel that you owe them.
Discover business opportunities in the market by yourself and start your own business! Don't say you're not good, don't think you're introverted. Introversion is not necessarily a bad thing. It shows that you are not greedy for fame and wealth, and you don't show off your talents. In addition, introverts don't open their mouths all the time, which will save them a lot of trouble. , you will also have more time to think quietly. Believe me, when you stand among a group of noisy and incapable people and think about your own affairs quietly, the boss will definitely choose you. Introversion is actually your capital.
2. Introverts are not necessarily bad at expressing themselves, and in today's society, performance is more important than good words. Work hard, earn enough capital, and then go out to work alone. As long as you have ideals and pursuits and work hard for them, you will definitely succeed! You can completely ignore the advice of those villains and just do your own thing and move towards your goals.
3. Don’t be afraid of those villains. From today on, walk on the street with your head held high and your chin slightly raised, giving others a feeling of being superior to others. To everyone you know, no matter if they treat you well or not, show them your most beautiful smile and greet them! In that way, you will find that the sun shines on everyone fairly, and your inferiority complex will disappear, because they cannot ignore such warm greetings. Smile at others and others will smile back.
4. If others criticize your performance, then continue to greet him with that expression. Be patient, ignore his words, and then whisper to him that this is the truth. of you. Of course, it will be more helpful if you go somewhere far away and change to a new environment.
5. If there is a disagreement, you must argue with reason. Of course, if you don't handle it, you can't blame others. If you are right, then tell your own truth. You don’t need to make others agree with it. It’s just the truth. If he says you support him, if the truth is on your side, then of course you have to support him. If you just have different ideas and there is no right or wrong, then you can express your ideas. There is nothing to be afraid of, because your idea may be the most brilliant. You don’t need the other person to accept anything. You just want to let him know that you also have something. own unique insights.
6. Confessing love to that girl is not always an option. Be bold, God gives everyone the power to love and blesses true love. Don't be discouraged if you are rejected, because after you express your feelings, even if she really doesn't like you at first, she will pay more attention to you, and the rest is up to you. Girls like to be taken seriously and like boys who are different. I believe you are just that.
7. You can make good friends through this method on the Internet, such as QQ. You don’t need to open your heart too much to anyone, you just need to establish a social circle of your own here. After that, you can go outside and take a look. Jogging every day is good for adjusting your physical and mental state. You can set goals for yourself and use your camera to record the beauty of the city you are in. In the process, you will discover the world. It's very kind and has many beautiful things. If it doesn't work, I suggest you make friends with children first, because children are very friendly and everything they say can be treated as childlike. In this way, you can go to the orphanage to see Look, you will really gain a lot from communicating with those children, and you will regain your confidence. Then you can find your peers, former classmates, friends, etc. Even if you don’t have any close friends, you can still establish them at work. New friendships.
8. Finally, I hope you can get rid of the current situation as soon as possible. Maybe you think that we people can't understand your difficulties, but in fact I am a very introverted person. I never say a word to others in the group, but I also have my own most important feelings. Good friends, and I have my own dream. If I work hard for it every day, I will naturally have passion and confidence. I also have a good relationship with my family and I am confident about the future. In fact, introverts are the ones who can easily achieve great things, because they do not focus on words but use actions to prove themselves. Hope this helps!