1. The small river in winter cannot freeze the wounds of yesterday. In the distance, there is only a ray of setting sun waiting for you

2. I only remember that you are in my memory

3. For some people, if you catch them, you will catch them. If you miss them, you will miss them. They can only say that their love is deep and their relationship is shallow. There are too many forks in the journey of life, and it may take a lifetime to turn around. We were familiar with each other at the last intersection, but we may be strangers at the next intersection...

4. Why don't you marry me? Is it because you think I'm too short, and are you afraid that my backless wedding dress will reveal all the way to my buttocks? ?

5. If, one day, I become arrogant, please remember that no one ever took me seriously

6. Every bit of life is recorded in our in my mind, but only love is divided into the deepest part of my mind.

7. I heard that love is very simple, so simple that the whole world will be scattered.

8. You know that I am good to you and have no need for you.

9. Many years later, I married the man I wanted. Thank you for not marrying me back then.

10. To all the people we have had a crush on, thank you, your smile has disturbed my years.

11. In fact, your friend looks like your best friend; but when you are not around, you don’t know what she will do.

12. I like it. Make friends with a female man!!! High-end atmosphere and class, low-key luxury and connotation!!

13. If you are good to me, I will treat you the same!

14. Once upon a time It's just a scam, he hurt us all deeply

15. If you love me, give me your hand, and I will hold you until the end of your life.

16. The biggest extravagant wish in this life is: to stay with you until we grow old, until we can’t go anywhere.

17. Cut love, my way.

18. If one day your figure appears in my mind again, maybe I will look for you regardless.

19. Why are you not here when I want you to be there? .

20. Heavy makeup and light makeup are just to cover up the ruthless ravages of time. The surface is more shiny. Classic talk about missing: Why have I been single? Because you have been single

1. Sometimes, I actually already know the answer. If I persist, I just hope that you will give me a surprise.

2. Why have you been single? Because you haven’t met the person you feel is destined to be. Why have I always been single? Because you have always been single.

3. Someone loved her, and it took several years, more than a lifetime, or even a lifetime, but he still couldn’t get into her heart. But someone took a second, or even just a glance, and walked into her heart. Heart.

4. What does it feel like to like someone who doesn’t like you? I can get full marks in your world, but I don’t have an admission ticket.

5. I will remember that I loved you deeply at the age of seventeen, when I shouldn’t have said love easily.

6. I don’t want you to remember my goodness, I just want you to remember me.

7. In my opinion, you are very happy because you can choose to love me or not. But I can only choose to love you or love you more.

8. If you like someone, you will be shameless and persistent; you will also be full of self-esteem, sensitive and fragile.

9. Suddenly I miss that person, me and her, more than friendship, less than love, but less than reality.

10. After enough disappointment, I let it go.

11. Anyone who has had a crush knows how rampant inferiority and self-love were in those days.

12. I hate having a third person with you, because it makes me feel uneasy. I feel it clearly - you are having a great conversation, but I am watching the dim lights alone. Why do I stay like this? I must have been homeless in my last life

1. I love you too much but I can’t express it in my heart

2. If love just passes you by, why love so deeply? .

3. Sometimes caring too much about you is a torture to myself.

4. You are not me. How could you know that I am mentally panicked and uneasy? Your words are enough to make me give up.

5. ◆Looking around makes me tremble, and I feel disappointed and ache. ◇

6. Time is like water, passing by impermanently. Happy moments always go by in such a hurry. Those figures that have not had time to be collected have already disappeared in the passage of time. Silent memories hide those things in time. The smile blends into the sighs, letting the dancing longings bloom in the mulberry field where things and people are different: the allure of flowers is fragrant with the fleeting season, and the longings gradually spread in the passing time: some familiar scenes, seemingly familiar pictures , the faint melancholy melody, the intoxicating and confusing fragrance, evoke the vast memories of the past in this season full of temptation.

7. We can never tell the difference between missed love: whether it is beautiful because of regret, or regretful because of beauty.

8. I once thought you were oxygen, but it turned out to be just a farce.

9. Because I know that I am a bad person, no one will feel sorry for me, and no one will care about me.

10. Facing your illuminated avatar, I finally managed to remain indifferent.

11. Thank you for holding my hand for so long. Now it’s time to let go.

12. The feeling of disappointment is probably that I sent you a good night before going to bed and you didn’t reply for a long time. , thinking you had gone to sleep, but woke up the next day but did not receive any missed text messages.

13. The current joys and sorrows are enough to make people have mixed feelings, but millions of people have experienced them before they turned into bones and dust.

14. No matter how cheap my love is, it will never be discounted for you.

15. There is only one heart between us.

16. Time will test your patience for my love more than your commitment.

17. No wonder people say that if you die with a close friend, you will have no regrets. It turns out that friends are really something you can meet but cannot ask for.

18. Waiting for an indefinite result, just to see your own sorrow clearly.

19. Maybe I can still see your messages, but it has nothing to do with me.

20. The future is long, but after all, we will not grow gray hair. Why would someone pretend to be happy? Are people who pretend to be happy happy?

I can't believe he would betray me! I trusted him so much and told him many things. I once thought that we could go on smoothly like this─until the day I saw his underwear on the balcony of her house

Between Lovers Betrayals happen almost every day, but those who encounter them are always surprised again and again. It is always hard for us to believe that the people we trust the most can hurt us the most. However, Dr. Jennifer Freyd and Pamela Birrell, psychology professors from the University of Oregon who have studied betrayal trauma for many years, may tell you that you think the opposite - because you Only by trusting him can he betray you.

Someone once mentioned a very important concept: when you choose to invest in a relationship, you must also bear the risk of being hurt. In other words, people who can listen to you can also destroy you.

After self-disclosure (referring to a person speaking his or her innermost thoughts to others and sharing his or her inner feelings and information with others), the other person becomes willing to share his secrets, and the distance between the two gradually widens. Closeness - in other words, part of an intimate relationship is carrying each other's secrets and bearing each other's pain.

Generally speaking, people with a low sense of security have more secrets, but if they are willing to share these secrets with others, it means that they trust the relationship--although trust may not always bring happiness.

But I got you, comforting betrayal

When his sex partner sent me a message, I couldn't work for almost a whole day. I don't know how she knew my phone, I just know that my heart hurts. So I called him, and he said that he was just playing with her, and then said a lot of things like that the one he really loves is me. After some tossing, I actually chose to believe him! I was very angry, angry with myself, and I didn’t understand why I was so stupid? Isn't the fact obvious? He has a mistress and I have been kept in the dark. Why should I still believe him?

Jennifer and Pamela will tell you that it is not that you are stupid, but that you cannot leave him. They found that many people are unable to face the betrayal of a close loved one because those people are important to them. The reason why a stark truth cannot be touched is not because you don't see it, but because it takes a lot of courage to admit it--and even, after admitting it, you may lose more things.

According to the investment model of Caryl Rusbult, a professor of social and organizational psychology at Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam in the Netherlands, the more we invest in a relationship, the harder it will be to leave it. A relationship - even if you are unhappy in it.

You don’t see it because you want to maintain the status quo

When you know that this relationship is very important to you, and you also know that any resistance and confrontation will probably terminate your relationship, you will Will choose to be out of sight. Replacing seeing with not seeing, and replacing solving with avoidance, Jennifer and Pamela call this phenomenon betrayal blindness.

When you choose to leave, you may start to consider the cost of leaving: Will my friends laugh at me? What to do with the children? Will he take revenge on me? How should I start a person's life

There are many phenomena of blindness studied in psychology, the most famous one is change blindness. A typical experiment is as follows: A researcher asked passers-by for directions. During the process, a moving worker moved a gate between them, interrupting their conversation. The researcher took the opportunity to replace the person asking for directions, but 50 people did not notice the question. The passerby has been replaced. In other words, these passers-by focused most of their attention on thinking about the map and ignored who was asking for directions.

Betrayal Blindsight involves more motivation than Change Blindsight. You ignore, forget, and have no impression of his cheating because you know that if you admit it, you will take more negative risks: quarrels, breakups, or divorce. The consequences are too much for you to bear, so your brain helps you forget them all together. In other words, this relationship is so important to you that your turning a blind eye is usually just for one thing: maintaining the status quo. He continues to ask you after get off work how your day was, talk about kids and upbringing, talk about what happened at work and school, and ignore each other's precarious relationship. Without facing, there is no separation, which is the most typical betrayal blindness.

The sense of security of self-deception

Some people have exaggerated memories, but whenever they talk about their memories between marriage and divorce, can we not talk about this? ? Words like "I don't know", "I forgot" and "It's all over" have sprung up like mushrooms after a spring rain. One can't help but wonder: Does he really not remember?

In the face of betrayal, we will turn a blind eye and selectively forget.

Perhaps, at the level of consciousness, this person has really forgotten.

In the book "Betrayal: The Untouchable Truth," Jennifer and Pamela cited numerous studies and unanimously pointed out a stable phenomenon: people who have experienced domestic violence, sexual assault, betrayal, and mistreatment, in When they grow up, they will develop more dissociative tendencies (dissociative). In many cognitive experiments, they will forget a lot of information related to negativity, trauma, and emotions. In this way, they will be able to survive in unsafe environments. Here, you gain a sense of self-deception.

Researchers speculate that these highly dissociated people may have damaged their selective attention (selective attention) due to long-term isolation of betrayal memories, and are unable to concentrate on one thing wholeheartedly, but they still maintain good performance. Distracted attention (pided attention) - this allows them to remember the color of the sheets when being raped in bed, but not what happened; when being abused by their father, they only remember the toys on the floor, but not the father's expression .

When you truly understand how terrible the past they faced and how betrayed their relatives and loved ones were, you will understand that a person chooses a pathological lifestyle because they are unable to do anything. Other options. Those traumas devastated them to the point of exhaustion of energy, and it is not easy to survive to this day. A senior psychological counselor once said.

Adaptation is a great ability. Because of it, some people turn a blind eye to oppression and betrayal, and regard abuse and violation as passing smoke, but they are not happy. Jennifer and Pamela pointed out that only through the process of knowing, expressing, and telling, and through companionship and a stable sense of security, can we truly face the embarrassments of the past. You may think that such an ending is very official, but coming forward to face the problem is never a slogan or an action, but a process.

We always live in various repetitions, contradictions and cycles: we promised to lose weight but gave up halfway, we promised not to cry for him again but we feel sad again, we promised to go to bed early but then lingered. Late at night, even if you are aware of these shortcomings, it is still difficult to face and change - let alone those who keep betrayal out of their consciousness?