1. Confucius said: "Three friends benefit you, and three friends harm you. Friends who are straightforward, forgiving, and knowledgeable are beneficial. Friends are open, friendly are soft, and friends are sycophantic."

Translation:

Confucius said: "There are three kinds of useful friends, and three kinds of harmful friends. It is beneficial to make friends with integrity, friends with integrity, and friends with extensive knowledge.

It is harmful to associate with flattering people, to associate with people who flatter others on the surface but slander others behind their backs, and to associate with people who are good at flattery. ”

2. The Master said: “Three pleasures are beneficial. It is a loss to enjoy the rituals and music, to enjoy the kindness of Taoists, and to enjoy many virtuous friends. It is a loss to enjoy the joy of arrogance and pleasure. >

Confucius said: "There are three kinds of beneficial happiness, and there are three kinds of harmful happiness. It is beneficial to be happy by abstaining from rituals and music, to be happy to promote the merits of others, and to be happy to make virtuous friends.

It is harmful to take pleasure in arrogance and indulgence, to take pleasure in dissipation, and to take pleasure in feasting and debauchery.”

3. The Master said: “A gentleman has three precepts; When you are young, your blood energy is not stable, and you should be careful about it; when you are strong, your blood energy is strong, and you should be careful about fighting. When you are old, your blood energy is weak, and you should be careful about it."

Translation:

Confucius said: "A gentleman has three precepts: when he is young, his blood is not stable, he must abstain from women; when he is in his prime, his blood is strong, he must abstain from fighting. When he reaches old age, his blood has weakened, he must abstain from greed."

4. Confucius said: "A gentleman has three fears: fear of destiny, fear of great men, and fear of the words of sages. If a villain does not know the destiny and is not afraid, he will challenge the great men and insult the words of sages."

Translation:

Confucius said: "A gentleman has three things to fear: reverence for the destiny, reverence for those in high positions, reverence for the words of saints, reverence for villains who do not know the justice given by heaven, and reverence for those in high positions. People are making fun of the saints."

5. Confucius said: "There are three mistakes in serving a gentleman: saying something before it is mentioned is called impatience; saying something but not saying it is called concealment, which is not seen. In terms of color, it is called blindness."

Translation:

When you really make friends with a gentleman, you must have three principles. You have to have a standard when to speak up and when not to speak up. First, speaking without words is called impatience.

You come out and say it before the words have even been said. This is called frizzy, which reflects a person's impatience. Second, talking about something but not saying it is called hiding. The topic has reached this point, but you are hesitant, secretive, and don't tell everyone what's in your heart.

Third, if no color is seen, it is called blindness. "罽" means blind. A person doesn't look at other people's faces when he speaks, and just speaks right away. It's nonsense.

6. Confucius said: "A gentleman has nine thoughts: to see clearly, to think intelligently, to think warmly in appearance, to think respectfully in appearance, to think loyally in words, to think respectfully in deeds, to think doubtful and questioning, to think indignantly, to think hard, to see what is possible. "Thinking about meaning."

Translation:

Confucius said: "A gentleman has nine points to consider: whether he understands what he sees, whether he understands what he hears, and the color on his face. Consider whether you are gentle, consider whether you are humble in your tolerance, and consider whether your language is loyal;

Consider whether you are cautious when doing things, consider how to ask people for advice when you have questions, and consider whether you will suffer any danger or benefit when you are upset. Always consider not forgetting your righteousness."

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Extended information:

As an important representative of Confucianism, Confucius has always He is a figure we talk about so much. His words recorded in The Analects of Confucius have taught us a lot about how to be a human being. Some people even regard some sentences as their life creeds and adhere to them throughout their lives. And in The Analects of Confucius, The most beneficial thing is Confucius’ “Way of Making Friends”.

There is a saying in "The Analects": "Confucius rarely talked about utilitarianism, life and benevolence." In today's terms, this sentence means: Confucius hardly talked about utilitarianism in his conversation, but agreed with it. Be benevolent and righteous, believe in destiny.

What is "benevolence"? Benevolence and justice are benevolence and morality. The highest expression of politics.

Confucius once said: "If a person is not benevolent, what is the courtesy? If a person is not benevolent, what is happiness?" This is enough to show how important "benevolence" is to a person.

People take their own personal interests more and more seriously, and pay more and more attention to the pursuit of personal interests. In this process, many people have already forgotten "benevolence". In this way, How can we talk about "benevolence" in the process of making friends and getting along with others? "A gentleman is represented by righteousness, and a villain is represented by profit.

The first type is called "friendship and straightness". Find an upright person to be your friend. This friend's character is the first priority. He can be straightforward and don't need to spend too much money.

The second type is called "friendship". Making friends with people who are sincere and trustworthy is usually as ordinary as water, but silently helps you when you are down. A true friend.

There is a story in history called "wine in white clothes". This is a very humble gift of wine from a high-ranking official to a poor celebrity. This is called a true friend.

The third type is called "friends with more knowledge". It is beneficial to make friends with knowledgeable and well-informed friends. Choosing friends is a science. Stay away from bad friends and walk with good friends, and your life will be more exciting.