As long as it's not a killer?

So, one Wednesday night, Emma and I held a party in my apartment and invited a group of young women who often used Tinder. Including Emma, these girls are millennials from the age of 22 to 33.

Like most young women I met, they impressed me deeply. Everyone has the ability to think independently and show a unique clothing style. Career is very important to them and seems to be a source of fun.

I poured champagne for everyone and showed them my mobile phone. They immediately began to analyze the men I matched successfully.

"Oh, look at this man. Emerson college. Very handsome. " Hannah softly.

"I don't think I should date college students." I said, "What do you think of this man? He said that this software is not good enough for me. " Eliza said it was a man's trick. "The man above will always say that you are too beautiful and excellent to use Tinder. This is their usual trick. " What about Zhu De? Everyone rolled their eyes. His message is obviously too long.

"The men on Tinder either don't reply or write you a novel." But wouldn't it be great if they could communicate? "I asked. Obviously not, because if they are communicating, they are all talking about themselves. ""Do you think there is any man in the world who not only talks about himself, but also doesn't consider himself? " I asked. Everyone said in unison: no.

Marion has a question: "how should we women deal with men's egocentric mentality?" Or should we just accept this fact, and then some man will pretend to listen to you for two seconds and be satisfied? 」

Emma spoke. She is the only person in this group who is not only single but also married tonight. She explained, "I don't think my husband is that self at all, but I am." I only talk about myself, and then sometimes I ask him how his day is. This will balance. So you just have to take care of yourself, because in a relationship between men and women, everyone can only take care of themselves. In this way, you can both try your best to care about yourself and then care about each other a little. 」

I smiled. "If you said this ten years ago, people would say,' These selfish * * *, that's why they don't have men! "But she has a man." Irina Kaptelova said. Yes, I think. This shows that this society has become a little better. Women can speak freely, but men are still willing to pair with them.

But did Emma and her husband meet on Tinder? No. When I poured more champagne, people began to criticize Tinder. "Finding a man on Tinder is like finding an apartment." Gina said, "It's boring. Men in their twenties in Tinder are taking medicine, and they are all diagnosed as sick by psychologists. " They will say, "I have attention deficit, so I can't reply to you." "Sending messages is actually very powerful, because there are not many people sending messages." Corinna said. "It's actually sexy to communicate with people who write messages. That's how I like to brew slowly. 」

"So my patience has long been polished." Gina * * *. "If someone matches me, I will directly ask when we can meet. I don't want to keep sending messages. I think this is what young people like to do. " "It's like a dynamic diagram." Irina Kaptelova said. "Oh, that's impossible. I like dynamic diagrams. " Corinna, 22, said. "Dynamic charts are the characteristics of a new generation. Emma explained, "It's like your grandmother doesn't know what emoji is. Like me, I don't know what a dynamic diagram is. 」

But there is always a happy ending, right? Like dating? "A date?" Marion scoffed. "One date when a man took me to an ATM really opened my eyes." Corinna said, "They go to work, and I follow. They went to pick up the dry cleaning clothes, and I followed. 」

"Once a man sent me a message asking me to meet him at the restaurant at eight o'clock. I'm so excited that I finally met a man who knows how to plan time. As a result, he made an appointment with me in a restaurant just because he wanted to go there to go to the bathroom. Then we went to Starbucks, but we didn't even drink a cup of coffee and were finally kicked out. Hannah said. Gina rolled her eyes. I'm afraid this man still lives with his mother. 」

As the most mature member, I have to ask this inevitable question: If dating is like work and men on the Internet are not good, why not try to meet men in the traditional way? Like in a bar? "The problem with going to a bar is that you don't necessarily know people. I've been going to bars for many years, and I've only met two men, and I'll sleep with them when I get home. Well, maybe four. " Gina said.

On the other hand, it is equally difficult to meet people on dating software, especially considering whether there will be a telephone in real life.

"I will see many men online and think: not handsome enough, not interested, but if I meet them in real life, I will actually be interested. Hannah said. When you get to know people in real life, you can feel their humanity. I can't do it online. 」

The atmosphere suddenly became tense, as if someone had said something politically incorrect.

There was a silence. "So you'd rather meet someone in real life? So you can meet all the people. Emma asked, as if such a thing were impossible.

"I don't think there is anything wrong with meeting people online." Hannah argued, "I mean, in the case of being divorced from reality, often only disappointment is left in the end." You can stare at a man's six beauties, but you still don't know if you will get in touch with him in real life. " Still have feelings.

"If you just want to sleep with people on Tinder, that's fine. You will feel that everything is under control. But once you feel it, it will be out of control. " Gina said. "Feeling" is what teenagers say now. Emma added. "If you have feelings for people, it's over. This is the characteristic of our next generation, which is getting worse and worse. " "But I like to sleep with people and have feelings. Marion said. If the other person has feelings for you, that is the best * * *. Hannah said. "Do you like the feeling of' love'?" I asked. No, "we just said that we basically care about each other. But you don't need to meet my parents or be my emergency contact, as long as you care about me a little. " Corinna said.

"Being nice is the advantage of men now. As long as you are not a murderer, that's fine. " Emma said that being friendly also means being open and honest, but it doesn't mean being transparent about everything. If you know how to communicate, full score 10 and 6, then I will definitely sleep with you. Hannah said. "Don't need a lot, just be a basic person. Marion said. Hannah turned to me and asked curiously, "How did you date when you were young? 」

Recommended reading: Is your child used to making friends online? In the online world, children in love rat concentration camp have complicated online dating relationships. How to guide them?