It is most suitable for men and women to get married within a few years of each other (1)

Height is not a distance, and age is not a problem. Girls who have been deceived by men will always bring up such topics to find reasons for themselves.

Confucius was born to a 72-year-old father and an 18-year-old mother. The age difference between his parents was the same as 82 and 28 years old. As a result, a generation of saints was born who influenced China for more than two thousand years. Does that mean that bigger is better for men and smaller is better for women? No, there must be a moderation in everything. The age difference is reasonable within a certain range, but if the gap is too big, not only will the younger one have to be called father, but life will also be somewhat inconsistent. At most, they can only enjoy the moment of pleasure, and in the blink of an eye they can only hold on to memories of mandarin ducks playing in the water. Just like moving a dilapidated old bed into a brand new villa, installing a bathroom worth tens of thousands of dollars in a dilapidated second-hand house, matching a platinum chain with a glass pendant, or a diamond pendant with an iron chain, it always feels like it's not the case.

But the age gap between men and women is normal. And they tend to be older boys and younger girls. So how can a beautiful girl accept a man who is older than her as her husband? One year old, two years old, three years old? Or ten years old, eight years old? Professor Gu Niu, an academician of the Chinese Academy of Sciences, finally found the answer and mathematical calculation formula to this question after fifty years of in-depth research based on the principles of the Chinese Book of Changes and Einstein's theory of relativity. That is, a beautiful girl can safely and boldly marry a man who is 14 years older than herself!

The development cycles of men and women are different. When we were in elementary school or junior high school, we knew that girls of the same age are often more sensible and more mature than ourselves. At that time, we often looked up to the pretty female classmate, but after work we met again inadvertently, and hey, why did we find that the female classmate was not as tall as our shoulders. This is something that happens to everyone. Later, when the man was in his fifties or sixties and was having a romantic affair in order to catch the tail of his youth, he found that the woman had already passed menopause. This shows that the menstrual cycles of men and women are different.

So how do you know what stage of development a man and a woman are in their menstrual cycle? What age should a girl at this stage look for in a man? In real life, girls often meet by mistake, marry a chicken and follow the chicken, and marry a dog and follow the dog. Later, I couldn't bear it any longer, so I divorced. So if we can know the menstrual cycles of men and women in advance and set a reasonable range for the age gap, we can take precautions and ensure a harmonious and happy life as a couple. Specifically, if men and women want to be in the same physical condition, the man's age should be 1.2857 times that of the girl. In other words, a 20-year-old woman is equivalent to a 25-year-old man; a 30-year-old woman is equivalent to a 38-year-old man; a 40-year-old woman is equivalent to a 51-year-old man; a 49-year-old woman is equivalent to a 63-year-old man. Men quite.

If you want to get along when you are young, then a girl can find a man who is about 5 years older than herself. If you want to still be able to get married at the age of 49, then you can find a 63-year-old man who is 14 years older than you. Of course, it can also be achieved in one step. A girl in her 20s can directly marry a man who is 14 years older than her, and she will become more and more compatible.

Why is this? Professor Gu Niu said: It turns out that a woman’s cycle is based on a stage of 7 years, and a man’s cycle is based on a stage of 9 years. 7 is actually a very mysterious number. Modern natural science research shows that any physical and chemical changes generally reach 6 stages, and 7 represents the end. Therefore, the Chinese classify the ever-changing strategies into six sixes, which is 36 strategies.

The West also knows this principle, so they set 7 days as a week. When the 7th day comes, it is designated as Sunday, and people go to church to worship to welcome the arrival of the next week. The Chinese Book of Changes also sets the number of changes in all things at seven 7s, which is 49, which is called the number of the Dayan.

The physiological changes of women correspond to the number 7. Many people don’t know how long a woman’s pregnancy lasts, which is called ten-month pregnancy. In fact, the fetus also develops in a seven-day cycle in the woman’s belly. When it reaches the fortieth stage of development in the woman’s belly, it will be 280 days. , the fetus will be born. After a child is born, he or she will grow and develop in a 7-year cycle.

The French are very smart. They set the marriage age of girls as 14 years old. Once the two cycles have passed and they can live as men and women, they are allowed to get married. Chinese law also defines a woman’s age of 14 as a threshold. Having sex with a girl under 14 years old, no matter what the reason, is a crime. Once the age of 14 is over, it is no longer a crime to rape a young girl. .

There is also an unwritten law in China, that is, there are only three things to do. After three, a qualitative change will occur. According to this principle, a girl's cycle is 7 years old. After three cycles, that is, after the age of 21, she will go downhill, that is, she will no longer grow and develop, but will slowly grow older. But a girl’s fourth cycle, from 21 to 28 years old, is a transitional period. In the first half of the period, the inertial force of development and growth was still maintained, and then it began to decline in the later period. That is, 21 years old plus 7 divided by 2, a girl will find that her appearance and body are getting worse and worse when she is about 24.5 years old.

Therefore, a sensible and smart girl should marry herself when she is close to 25 years old and in her prime, and at least find a stable boyfriend, otherwise, like a tofu seller, she will slowly become sour and lose value. Then why define women as 49 and men as 63, and conclude that women can marry men 14 years older than themselves, instead of defining them by older years? Because, Qiqi 49, 49 is the number with the largest change in the Book of Changes, the number of the Dayan. In other words, when a woman reaches the seventh 7-year cycle, that is, at the age of 49, she has basically completed her development. At this time, women begin to enter menopause and menopause.

Men will feel powerless only after seven nine-year cycles, that is, at the age of 63. If you want both men and women to enter the menopausal period at the same time, the ideal age difference is 14 years. If a woman is over 49 and a man is over 63, it doesn’t matter how big the age difference is. At this time, husband and wife are just partners living together.

At the same time, although men will be unable to do what they want when they reach the age of 63, the real life cycle of a man is not 7 9 years, but 9 9 years, which means that a man should live to 81 years old. There are only a few exceptions above this age. Nine nines return to one, this sentence is familiar to everyone, that is, after nine nines, we will return to our original nature.

Lao Tzu’s Tao Te Ching has ninety-nine and eighty-one chapters. After the winter solstice, when the sun rises, the sun moves northward and enters the cold weather of counting nine. When counting nine nines, it will completely enter the spring season of the coming year. In other words, a woman's cycle is 49 years old and a man's cycle is 81 years old. But why do we see that women are actually older on average than men?

This also starts with the Book of Changes. In the Book of Changes, the yang representing a man is a long line "—" that is not broken in the middle, and the yin representing a woman is two short lines "--" that is broken in the middle. ". It can also be seen from here that although men are longer, they only have one line and only one cycle. Women have shorter cycles, but two cycles. In other words, a woman is 49 years old in one cycle, but with two cycles, a woman should live to be 98 years old. However, there don’t seem to be many 98-year-old women. Why is this?

This is because women have their period once a month and lose their body's essence over time. And giving birth to children is even more damaging to the body. As a result, a woman's 98-year-old cycle is discounted. Therefore, it seems that although women's life span is longer than that of men, it does not extend much longer. It does not mean that the average age of women is 17 years higher than that of men.

After talking about the woman’s cycle, you can calculate the man’s cycle and changes by yourself without going into details. Final conclusion: A man can be 1.2857 times older than a girl. The maximum age difference can be 14 years. Of course, this is just a general theoretical value.

What age difference is the best for men and women to get married (2)

Speaking of how old is the best age to get married? What age is the best person to marry? There is no exact answer to these questions. At least with the development of society, the progress of the times, and the different living areas, the answer will change. For example, in ancient times, when the population was small, rulers encouraged early birth and childbearing in order to increase the population and enhance national strength. At that time, girls got married and had children at the age of 16, or even earlier. Those who were unmarried after the age of 20 were considered old girls. At that time, boys got married when they were about seventeen or eighteen years old. However, things are different now. Society has developed and the population is too large. It is too late to implement family planning, let alone early birth and childbearing.

Now, generally speaking, the larger and medium-sized cities are, the later they get married. It is normal for men to be 34 or 35 years old, and there are also many women who are unmarried in their 30s. Moreover, the more developed countries get married later, the average marriage in Britain and the United States is much later than in my country, and more and more people choose not to get married. The more backward regions or countries, such as rural areas, get married relatively early. As far as we know, most rural boys get married at the age of 18, and they like to find a 20-year-old girl to marry who can help with farm work. It can be seen that different regions, different countries, and different eras have different requirements for the age of marriage.

Considering that most of the readers of this article are urbanites, we will discuss today: What is the appropriate age for young people to get married in contemporary cities in our country? What is the best age to choose a partner? Speaking of this issue, maybe the traditional view is that men and women are 25 or 26 years old, and it is best for men to be 1 or 2 years older than women. In fact, the traditional view may not be correct. For thousands of years, everyone thought that the earth was flat and that it was carried on the back of a turtle. Whether something is right or not can only be known through careful consideration and practice. Survey research shows that in modern times, in large and medium-sized cities in my country, it is more appropriate for a girl to marry a man aged 32 to 35 between the ages of 24 and 25. In other words, it is best for girls to get married before the age of 25. It is appropriate to marry a man who is 5 to 14 years older than you. If a girl does not marry herself off as soon as possible when she is 25 years old (26 years old at the latest), then it will be more difficult for her to marry well in the future. But boys are fine. As the saying goes, "a man is like a tweed at 40" and "a woman is a piece of shit at 40." Nowadays, more and more boys are born in big cities, and most of them get married after the age of 30. There are many reasons why I say this. Let me talk further:

Reason 1: Judging from the changes in appearance and body shape of men and women, girls generally become weaker and weaker day by day after they are 25 years old. And it’s so fast that it makes you look a bit old by the time you turn 30. Women are like the moon, which reaches its full moon at the age of 25. Why do girls age so quickly? In addition to genes, it is also because women have their period once a month and lose their body's essence over time. Boys are different. Boys grow and develop more slowly than girls since childhood. They don't start to decline until they are about 30 years old, and the rate is much slower than that of girls. A eldest sister in her 50s said that when she was 20 years old, she fell in love with a man who was 16 years older than her. Later, her parents said that the age gap was too big and it didn't work out. But 30 years later, she said that the man looked younger than her. . As the saying goes, "women can live without aging, and men can age without aging." This sentence fully illustrates the physiological differences between men and women. We say that boys are at least 5 years older than girls. This is the truth. The maximum difference of 14 years is a psychologically acceptable range, but the optimal difference is about 9 years. I will talk about the reasons below.

Reason 2: From the perspective of genetics and the birth of offspring, whether the offspring is healthy mainly depends on the mother, because the baby has to grow in the mother's body, and whether the offspring is smart mainly depends on the father. This is genetic. Young mothers ensure healthy offspring, while only older fathers have a greater chance of smart offspring. It is also due to the physiological differences between men and women. A woman's IQ basically stops growing when she reaches the age of 18. This is why many older women still look naive. Men are different. Men develop later than women, but men’s IQ development is constantly growing, a bit like endless. The older they get, the smarter they appear. What we mean by smart is not a good memory, but a strong ability to analyze and solve problems. Modern scientific research believes that the IQ of offspring is mainly inherited from the father.

To give a few examples:

Confucius: His parents are 54 years apart in age. He is the founder of the Confucian school and the greatest philosopher, thinker and educator in China. For more than a thousand years, it is still the code of conduct for the Chinese people.

Tchaikovsky: His parents are 18 years apart in age, and he is the greatest musician in Russia. Famous for "Swan Lake" and "The Nutcracker".

Gogol: His parents are 14 years apart in age. He is the pioneer of the Russian satirical literary genre, the founder of critical realist literature, and the father of Russian prose. His representative works include "Diary of a Madman", "The Jacket", "The Imperial Envoy" and "Dead Souls".

Beethoven: His parents are 14 years apart in age. He is one of the representatives of the Viennese classical music school and the king of the symphony world.

Representative works include "Third Symphony" (Hero), "Fifth Symphony" (Destiny), "Ninth Symphony", etc.

Marie Curie: Her parents were 11 years apart in age. She was the most outstanding female scientist in Poland. She studied radioactive phenomena and discovered two radioactive elements: radium and polonium. She won the Nobel Prize twice in her life.

Einstein: By far the smartest man in the world. His parents were 11 years apart in age. He was the greatest natural scientist of the 20th century. His theory of relativity became the cornerstone of modern physics. Won the Nobel Prize in Physics in 1921.

Reason three: The combination of an old husband and a young wife is more conducive to a man’s career success and the health of his offspring. Many accomplished people such as Chiang Kai-shek, Mao Zedong, Deng Xiaoping, etc. have a large age gap between their husbands. Sun Yat-sen and Soong Ching Ling, Liu Shaoqi and Wang Guangmei, Lu Xun and Xu Guangping, Xu Beihong and Liao Jingwen are all more than 20 years apart. The age gap between Arafat and Suha is 34 years, the age gap between Zhang Xueliang and Zhao Yidi is 12 years, the age gap between Qiao Guanhua and Zhang Hanzhi is 22 years, and Chen Yun is 14 years older than his wife. Until Chen Yun’s death, he and his wife lived together for 57 years. Year.

Reason four: From an economic perspective, men in their 30s are much better able to support their families. Many of them have money, a house, a car, and at least a certain amount of wife capital. This is incomparable to 24- and 25-year-old boys. Can 24- and 25-year-old boys, who have just graduated from college and have no money or house at all, be able to buy a house in this life? They are all unknowns. Can I find a job? When will work stabilize? Still, even if you find a job right away, the salary will not be high at first, just enough to support yourself. It's so hard to find a job now that many college students are offering free trials without salary. Therefore, a girl between the ages of 23 and 25 who marries a man in his 30s will basically not have to suffer from poverty, life will be very easy, and he will immediately live a stable life, or even a good life. At least a man in his thirties can already roughly tell the beauty and ugliness in appearance, fatness and thinness in body shape, youth and age in appearance, and career success.

Reason five: Men generally have a pity for the weak, so if the age gap is larger, women will be very favored, and at least they will be shared with a lot of housework. There is an example on the Internet. A girl married a boy in her class after graduating from college. Three years later, at a class reunion, she said that she regretted it and should find a man who was a few years older to marry because the boy had no idea. He loved her, and when she was half exhausted from working, he read the newspaper. Such examples abound, which shows that men generally like to love the weak. We are all the same age, do we still need to love him?

Reason 6: Older men are mature and tolerant and rarely quarrel with you, so the marriage will be more stable. Little boys are just the opposite. There is nothing they can do. Everyone is young and energetic. No one will give in to anyone, and no one will obey anyone.

Reason seven: According to popular statistics on the Internet, 85% of college lovers break up after graduation, and only 15% get married. The year of graduation is the year of breakup. According to data we saw in a newspaper in Beijing, the breakup rate is 95%. No matter which one is correct, 85% or 95%, it is about 90%. Why did they break up right after graduation? The reason is also very simple, forced by the pressure of harsh reality. Everyone has no job, no money, no house, and most likely their homes are not in the same city. We don’t want to break up, etc.

Reason 8: According to statistics, in recent years, "the smaller the age gap between husband and wife, the higher the divorce rate." Divorce within three years is quite common. According to the Wuhan Evening News, the Hanyang District Civil Affairs Bureau of Wuhan conducted a survey of 921 couples who divorced in 2004 and found that couples of the same age have become the high-risk combination with the highest divorce rate. At the same time, the Yichang City White Paper on Marital Status also pointed out that the divorce rate of couples with a one-year age difference in the city's Xiling District was the highest, reaching 19.85%, and the divorce rate of couples with a two-year age difference was 17.44%. They are considered the same age even if they are 3 years apart. The reasons lie in the following points. First, everyone is young, has a childish personality, and lacks patience and tolerance. Second, there are economic reasons. The economy is not good in the first place, and having children makes you even more nervous, which can easily lead to quarrels. Third, both men and women are in the initial stage of work. They are very busy at work, exhausted physically and mentally, and have little time for communication or are unwilling to communicate. Fourth, the good reputation of men and women creates house slaves and car slaves who have to pay monthly mortgages, feel very uncomfortable every day, and feel irritable when encountering family problems.

Fifth, both parties have very little income, lack material foundation, and rely on the help of their parents for a long time, which leads to various conflicts.

Reason 9: If couples of the same age do not divorce within three years, even if they have passed the running-in period, the possibility of divorce will become greater and greater after 10 to 20 years of marriage than couples of different ages. why is that? The ancients saw it through long ago and said: "A woman treats others with sex, but she loves others with sex." That is to say, when a woman gets older and loses her beauty, men feel uncomfortable and don’t like her anymore. There is another saying: "Women can live without getting old, and men can get old without living." That is to say, women age faster than men. If they are a couple of the same age, after ten or twenty years, the woman will look older and the man will still look young, and the man will be dissatisfied. Therefore, couples of the same age may seem to be a very good match when they get married, but over ten years, the woman will age very quickly and will become less and less suitable for each other. The possibility of divorce will become greater and greater. He doesn’t care whether you were with him in the past or not. We shared the joys and sorrows, survived the initial hardships, and gave him the best of my youth. What's more, some people even think: "If you get promoted and get rich, your wife will die." But on the other hand, a girl in her twenties marries a man in his thirties. Although they don’t look like a good match when they first get married, over ten years, as time goes by, women age faster than men. , the appearance of the two people will become more and more suitable, and the stability of the marriage will become greater and greater. So there is another statistic, "The greater the age difference between couples, the lower the divorce rate." This is the reason.

Reason 10: Men generally don’t like strong women, so don’t make yourself too strong. Women who are too strong will put a lot of pressure on men, resulting in no one wanting her. Therefore, it is best for girls not to go to graduate school, Ph.D., or become a big boss. There are countless female Ph.D.s, strong women, and high-paid white-collar women who cannot find a partner. They are everywhere, even if they want to study. You should also get married first and then study. According to reliable data surveys, the ratio of highly educated unmarried men and women in Beijing is 1:10. What a terrible number! The blind date ratio of men and women in Shanghai is 1:10, 70% of older unmarried people in Guangzhou are women, the blind date ratio of men and women in Beijing in 2008 is 1:8, and the male to female ratio in Shenzhen is 1:7. So girls, don’t let yourself get older or become too strong. A college degree is just right. While you are young, find a man in his thirties with good conditions to marry you before the age of 25 (26 at the latest). , don’t be too picky, no one is perfect. We know a few examples. She was originally a school belle, but she was too picky and looked at everyone with flaws. After 5 or 6 years of choosing her, she was nearly 30 years old. Now no man is interested in her. Firstly, She is not very beautiful anymore. Secondly, everyone knows that she is too picky and no one can stand her. Her family members say that she is mentally abnormal. Another beauty was picked out until she was in her thirties and no one wanted her. Finally, Why do you think it's so hard to take the initiative to pursue an old divorced man with a child? Therefore, female college students have only two years, or at most three years, after graduating from undergraduate studies, to marry off as soon as possible. The more you choose, the worse your conditions will be, and they will not get better. After the age of 26, there is almost no hope for life. If you set your sights too high, you will be the unlucky one. Unfortunately, not many women understand these truths. Nowadays, in large and medium-sized cities, there are more and more "leftover women" who are elderly, high-income, and high-consumption. It seems that they don't plan to get married in this life. There is another important reason why girls should not go to graduate school. The higher the academic qualifications, the harder it is for girls to find a job. If the major is good, it is better. If the major is not good, about 30% of women with master's degrees can find jobs, and 10% of women with PhDs can find jobs. It is good. . To be honest, don’t be afraid. Last year, our school’s female doctorate signing rate was 0%, and the school did not dare to tell anyone. This is exactly the opposite of boys. It is easier for boys to find jobs if they are highly educated. There is no way, men and women are just different, different in every aspect. Therefore, when people live in this world, the most important thing is to understand the situation clearly and not to make subjective assumptions. Some parents don’t understand anything, so they tell their daughters to continue studying, as high as they can go, and as good as they can get. At the end of their studies, they are getting older, and they can’t find a job or a husband. Here, this life is over. It may be a good thing for national development, but it may be a tragedy for oneself.

According to the "Chinese Social Marriage and Love Survey Report" jointly written and released in 2007 by the School of Psychology of Beijing Normal University, CCW Research and Baihe Marriage and Love Research Institute, the results of the report are basically consistent with our views.

The report said that in 2006, more than 90% of women believed that men aged 23 to 26 were ideal marriage partners, while men in their 30s were only "favored" by half of the women; but by 2007, the results were fundamentally reversed. In the eyes of women, the ideal age for men to get married has been postponed to 31 years old, and the favorability of men aged 30 and 31 has suddenly increased to 80%. In other words, about 80% of women believe that men in their thirties are the most suitable for marriage. This shows that many girls now gradually understand that men around the age of 25 are not suitable for marriage, but we have to say that they do not understand enough. In fact, the ideal age of 31 has to be pushed back by 2 or 3 years, especially If a man wants to support his family, he must achieve a certain social status. Whether in ancient times or in modern times, "a wife is more valued than her husband, and a mother is more valued than her children." With the rapid development of society, competition has become more intense, which has become more important for men. It’s even harder. This age has to be pushed back a few years. For example, statistics from Harvard University in the United States show that successful men are generally more than twelve years older than their spouses. In the UK, the average age of marriage for men is now 36. There is no way. People are more developed than us. And the more developed it is, the greater the pressure, and the more people choose not to get married. The report also shows that most (more than 65%) men think that the ideal marriage partner is a 25-year-old woman. From the age of 30, their chances of marriage plummet: at the age of 30, 25.5% of men think that marrying her It’s OK; at the age of 35, only 12.5% ??of men can accept it. It is much easier for men. Even at the age of 35, one-third of women are still willing to marry him. At the age of 40, 15.2% of women will choose him. Although official statistics show that there are currently more men than women in our country, in reality there always seem to be more “leftover women” than “leftover men.” The report also said that people with similar personalities are more likely to fall in love. "Strong men and weak women" have high marital satisfaction. More than 20% of couples "regret their marriage" within 3 years of marriage. There is a significant relationship between income and the quality of marriage. The wife has a bachelor's degree or above, and her husband The marital satisfaction of a man whose wife has a college degree or below is significantly higher than that of a husband whose wife has a college degree or below; a husband who has a higher education than his wife has significantly higher marital satisfaction than a husband who has a wife who has a higher education than her husband.

The requirements for a good wife are: young, beautiful, pure, and gentle; the requirements for a good husband are: having a certain social status, having the ability to make money to support the family, support parents, raise children, love his wife, . Therefore, girls must not do anything that violates these four requirements. As girls begin to get older, these advantages will disappear. Some girls even talk about friends with little boys and even play house. At home, apart from wasting our feelings and damaging our own advantages, we don’t see any benefits. Those boys in their early 20s can only play with you. Do they really think they can give you any guarantee of life and happiness? He will only hurt you after a few years. He didn't even think about getting married before he was 30 years old, and he didn't have the basic conditions to get married. But as a girl, you can't afford to play around. The end of your life is approaching when you are 25, so you must make plans for your life from the age of 20. You can't just play around like boys. Talking about relationships and finding a partner should not be like a drag race. What should you do if you do it for 5 or 6 years and it blows up in the end? What to do if there is no guarantee of life in the end? Girls are very hurt. It is an exaggeration to say that it only takes two or three months to see the basic essence of a person. Girls cannot afford to delay it. If a college girl really wants to make friends, you can find a master's student or a doctoral student, which is better. An unmarried college teacher is also good. In short, don’t play emotional games with your classmates, it won’t work. The ten reasons are all written above. But one thing you need to pay attention to is to make sure that the other party does not have a wife. Don't accidentally be regarded as a mistress. Time is too cruel for women, and it is very unfavorable for women to choose a partner. They only have a few years between the ages of 20 and 25, but men are much more relaxed. They have about ten years between the ages of 28 and 38. There is no way, men and women are different in every way. Therefore, for women, they must not be too picky. If they find someone with good conditions, marry them, otherwise they will definitely become worse the more they choose. Hey, there are more and more leftover women in cities now, just because they are too picky. Guys in their 20s don't worry if you don't have a partner. Study hard, work hard, and make more money. Your golden age will not be reached until you are 30, the age when you are most valuable.

Finally, to get married, you should find someone with similar conditions. There is no need for complementarity. Complementarity means extreme inappropriateness. Northerners should not marry southerners, and urbanites should not marry rural people. The education level should not be too different. The more similar hobbies and interests the better. The living habits should not be too different. It is best to have similar views on things. In short, the smaller the difference, the better, and the more stable the marriage will be. All divorces are caused by conflicts, and conflicts are caused by too great a gap in some aspect. Being a good match is indeed the key to getting married.

All unmarried girls under the age of 25 and unmarried boys under the age of 30 who read this article are lucky. I wish everyone can build a happy family.