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Make friends without looking at circles.
You should believe that society will become more realistic in the future. As long as you are valuable and surrounded by friends, you are worthless and surrounded by indifference.

The most precious thing about time is that it can create value and wealth.

More and more, I feel that it is better to talk to valuable people than to talk to worthless people.

Talking to losers is torture.

Say something useful, or don't talk to me. Because I want to use time to create value.

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What is a valuable person?

The quickest and most effective way to enhance value is to see how many useful friends you have around you.

There is a famous saying in Shancheng, the former richest man in Japan: "Don't make friends with the poor."

You are right! Time and energy are limited. If you make friends, don't associate with people who are worse than yourself. If you want to make friends, you must make friends with people who are more capable and better than yourself!

If you are a fish, you must find a place with water.

You are a woodcutter. One day, you met a shepherd. Then you two talked all day. Finally, the shepherd has enough sheep to go back. But where is your firewood?

That's what making friends is all about. You are not from the circle. You don't want to cut more wood yourself. What will your life be like if you talk to a shepherd for a day? Are you going to herd sheep, too?

Get rid of those useless social activities! Spend time with people who deserve it. Some people seem to be chatting with you, but in fact they are wasting your life.

Meaningless socializing will only consume your energy and reduce your quality of life.

Mediocre circles can't store anything for your future.

It will assimilate you and become as mediocre as them.

Meaningless socializing will only consume your energy and reduce your quality of life.

Not all people are worth interacting with, and not all bureaus are worth participating in.

As Yu Hua said:

"I no longer pretend to have many friends, but start my life with my true self."

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There is a topic on Zhihu: "How can the relationship between friends fade?"

A highly praised answer is:

"Why didn't anyone admit that the knowledge gap of social resources status widened, which led to two people having nothing to say but catching up? Until the past, chewing repeatedly, tasteless, and because of feelings, afraid of being accused of snobbery, I had to barely maintain my love for praise.

However, many friends who got into trouble when they were young can only remember that many people who became attached to each other because of kindness are only suitable for repaying kindness. Friends are people who need to exchange ideas, not just feelings. "

It was always 20 years ago that some people chatted with you. Chewing on what happened in the past over and over again is neither new nor interesting.

What are you waiting for if you don't alienate your friends like this?

If such a person is too far away, the relationship will be weak; If the reliability is too close, the resentment will come.

Yan Ying, a good friend of Zhang Ailing, a talented woman in the Republic of China, once wrote several letters to her, but Zhang Ailing didn't reply.

Yan Ying was full of grievances and said with chagrin, "I don't know what I did wrong to make you ignore me."

Zhang Ailing only left a decisive sentence: "I don't like a person always talking to me about things decades ago, as if I were a dead man."

Those who overlap and stay in the past, the same topic, also stay in the past.

Sometimes, the relationship between friends is weak because there are only memories left.

The past days are worth remembering, but always remembering them will make people tired; It is worthwhile to recall the past, but always recalling it will make people lose interest.

Life is obviously moving forward, and no one wants to talk about the past all the time.

03

People with different experiences, different ideas and different patterns will gradually form people in two worlds.

Everyone is his own screenwriter, writing different life scripts.

Some people write philosophy in their lives,

Some people write legends in their lives,

Some people's lives are unremarkable,

Some people have nothing to write in their lives,

It is difficult for people with different lives to talk together and become friends.

Without the living environment and circumstances, it is difficult to talk with one heart and one mind.

Only when two people can talk can friendship continue.

After all, the intersection of words reflects the intersection of ideas; The intersection of ideas also affects the intersection of two people's friendship.

The essence of maintaining a relationship is "matching".

Our ideas always run counter to each other, and our communication always casts pearls before swine. Such friendship is hard to maintain.

Beethoven once said: "The foundation of friendship lies in the greatest similarity between two people's hearts and souls."

You can understand his thoughts, and he can understand everything you say and do. The same rhythm, the same pace, can walk side by side.

In fact, all friendships are about "matching".

Diamond cut diamond, to meet talented people,

Only when we are evenly matched can we move forward in the long run.

04

Someone in Zhihu asked, "What moment made you want to give up a good friend?"

A highly praised answer is: "when two people no longer grow up at the same frequency, their three views conflict."

Mistakes can be forgiven, but they are not in a world. What about communication? "

Just like I said the sea was beautiful, you said the sea drowned many people.

Feelings, frequencies and opinions are different. How can we become friends? And then simply die of old age, which is the greatest kindness to each other.

Only people with the same frequency will get along more comfortably and go further.

People with similar frequencies will eventually come together, even if they cross mountains and mountains;

People with different frequencies, even if they get along day and night, are not the same person after all.

With people on the same frequency, he knows your eyes, actions and words.

He knows what you want to say, and you can be your truest self in front of him, without pretending or trying to be brave.

Whether it is a friend relationship or a lover relationship, only people with the same frequency will get along more comfortably and go further.

In one's life, only when you meet a person with the same frequency can you appreciate your uniqueness, understand your difficulties, know your warmth and sadness, give you the greatest spiritual relief and relieve your spiritual hardship.

When you get along with people with different frequencies, when you like to do something, you feel meaningless and even look down on you in his eyes.

What you are interested in, he thinks you are talking nonsense and even laughs at you.

You bravely pursue what you want, he thinks you are trying to be brave, and even says you are overreaching. ...

Living with such a person is simply a painful torture, which is tantamount to mental stress.

And with people who know you on the same frequency, your happiness doubles and you feel happy.

As Liao Yimei said, "It is not uncommon for people to encounter love and sex in their life. What is rare is to meet understanding. "

For the rest of my life, please find someone with the same frequency!

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You can talk, have the same views and cognition, and this is the friend you want to make.

If there is a gap between the growth rates of two people, even the best friendship will drift away.

Only when the ability is equal and the thought is equal can the friendship between two people last forever.

The greatest happiness in life is to find someone who is worthy of you!

Good luck finding someone who matches you!