I'm glad to answer your question. Your question is also my personal opinion. I really feel afraid that he will be too lonely if he has a child. If you have a second child, the two children will have a companion. Let's share my personal thoughts and opinions.
Having a second child is to make sure that the child is not lonely when he is young, and that when he grows up, someone will discuss it and someone will rely on it.
Blood is thicker than water, because I have a brother. This brotherhood is the most unique and intimate feeling in the world.
My brother and I are only one year apart. When we were children, we quarreled and often fought. When I was a child, I thought this smelly brother was really annoying. Every time my father comes home, I go to complain. My father threatened to whip me, and I couldn't bear to throw it away. I immediately told my dad not to hit my brother (is it a little girly, but children really just want my brother not to be hit).
One day after school, my brother didn't come home. Just when everyone was in a hurry, my brother gave a cry. My mouth is bleeding, my pants are torn and I am hurt all over. It turned out that I was eating while riding a bike and fell down. At that time, I saw tears of distress falling straight down.
When I was older, my brother went to college, and no one quarreled with me anymore, but he began to learn to buy clothes and bags for me. Every time my brother comes back, he is extremely happy.
After graduation, I went to the city where my brother worked and joined the same company, so I felt more secure wherever I went.
Now that we are married separately, even if we don't contact each other at ordinary times, our mutual concern and intimacy will never decrease.
Going home during the Spring Festival will be full of laughter, and we will fight with each other and talk nonstop.
In this world, there is a person connected with your blood. I sincerely hope you are all right. He will not hesitate to help you when you need it. If we are not here in the future, at least they still have each other.
The most precious thing in this world should be family. And we can not only give our children a father's love, but also let them have brotherhood, which is a very beautiful thing.
Probably not, I can't help it!
Tell me about my mental journey of having a second child. In the spring of 2003, SARS was rampant. Although we are not in the hardest hit area, we are still afraid of hearing relevant reports. Deeply moved by the dedication of medical staff, we also feel that life is so fragile and vulnerable!
At that time, my son was six years old and very lively and lovely. Looking at his pink face and bright eyes, I am very happy. Suddenly, a terrible idea came to my mind: SARS is rampant and life is impermanent. If disaster strikes, I only have this lovely child! How lonely children will be in this world if I leave. If something happens to the child, I ... dare to think. ...
At that moment, I firmly believed: in any case, I must regenerate one! Even if nothing happens, our parents will die before him forever. Once we leave, at least the child has a relative in the world!
In spring of 2004, my second child was born. Although raising children is not easy, I really feel the happiness of two children!
Hello, I am a post-85, full-time second-child nanny from George and Xiaohua Life Research Institute. I'm glad to answer your question.
My second child was an accident. Although it was hard to take care of her, I lost my job and became a full-time mother, but I don't regret giving birth to her.
The reasons for having a second child are complicated. I am afraid that my children will be lonely, and I am afraid that I will have no expectations when I am old.
I am an only child. I have lived under the attention of my family since I was a child. I don't know how stressful it is. What is competition?
At the age of 30, there are old people and young people in the world. Raising two children and taking care of four elders often feel overwhelmed.
I often live with my in-laws, so I can't stay with my parents all the time. I know they will be lonely when they eat on holidays. But on traditional festivals, if I abandon my in-laws and go to my home, it will inevitably cause dissatisfaction.
Occasionally, I will go to live with my parents, and I will find that their lives will also have a lot of needs, and they will be very happy and full of vitality.
For myself, fortunately, I didn't get married too far, so I can visit my parents often. If I marry someone else because of work or marriage, my parents will become empty nesters, and the only child will feel guilty about this.
Sometimes I especially want to have a brother, a younger brother or even a sister, who can share the attention of parents, send extra warmth to parents, have intimate people to talk to and share important events in life.
Now that I have these problems, think about my children. When he grows up, he will have a childhood partner to share the pressure of his parents, but when I get old, I will have different expectations and I will be overjoyed.
In short, there are many factors to have a second child. Two children bring a lot of happiness. A mother has several children, and their personalities are completely different. Putting aside those pressures and expectations is to accompany children to grow up and make them laugh and play, which is also the happiness of life.
Frankly speaking, there are some of these two ideas, but this is not the most critical.
I personally chose to have a second child, mainly because I was very young when I gave birth to the child, and with the help of my parents-in-law, many details of the child's upbringing were passed without my careful understanding, so I hope to have a second child, take good care of her and feel the beautiful moment of life growth.
As a mother with a second child, I was a little anxious at first, so I adjusted some ideas. Now I'm much calmer, and I'll share with you:
First, raising one more child will bring greater economic pressure, but it will also bring greater motivation to make money. That's for sure. For example, saving a child for college tuition may save 500,000 yuan, which is similar to going to college in China. But with two children, this number will double.
On the other hand, having another child gives you more motivation to take some risks and earn more money.
For example, I seldom took the initiative to talk about cooperation before, but since I was pregnant with Bauer, my desire to make money has been much higher, I have considered it more comprehensively in the workplace, and my initiative is different from before.
Second, the experience of two-child families and one-child families is different. This is not only to solve the problem of a child's loneliness, but also to parents, the maturity of education after giving birth to a second child will be different.
Therefore, having a second child is also our parents' life choice.
Third, having a second child will give you an extra guarantee when you get old, or it may be an extra burden. Think about it, you have to take care of the children when you are old. You have two children, representing two small families. Which small family are you helping?
Therefore, if you want to prevent old age, you should also be psychologically prepared to have one more child. When you are old, you will take on more things.
Therefore, when giving birth to a second child, everyone must be cautious. You must be prepared in your heart, not who advised you to. Otherwise, you will easily regret it and blame the person who advised you. Any choice has advantages and disadvantages, but is this choice what you want?
I am Lian Jun, a psychological counselor, and I am here to answer your questions with my professional knowledge.
Hello, I'm Ma Bao Nian, and I'm glad to answer your questions. We only have a three-year-old child now and have no plans to have a second child, but every time my mother sees the child, she will say, "I look at the child so pitifully." It is really hurtful for such a good child of ours to bear such great pressure in the future. " Every time I hear such words, I automatically block them, haha! Let me tell you my opinion:
I know everything my mother said is reasonable, but it's the best result my mother imagined, but things won't go your way. I sometimes have some doubts about the second child, but the father of the child has always been firm, and what the father of the child said has some truth: when the child grows up, he will have his own life, so we will make good money, and the pension mechanism may be reformed in the future. Better and better. In the worst case, we will live in a better nursing home with professional nurses and doctors.
There are brothers and sisters, who may be relatives when they were children, but some become "friends" after marriage. Some people even became enemies. How can we talk about helping each other? Isn't there a saying now: it's not appropriate to do it, but to touch yourself. If there is only one child in a family, the child will take care of his parents' pension. The more they have one more child, the more they care about this problem. Whoever takes care of his parents more will get more money. And every child grows up with different family conditions. Some people think that providing for the aged is not a problem, so they will take good care of the elderly. Some people feel that taking care of the elderly is stressful and can't do their best.
Conclusion I am studying in Ma Bao. Welcome to pay attention to @ Danianbao and exchange parenting experiences. Brother and sister love, brotherhood, raising children to prevent old age, unfilial first, no future is great, have both.
Whether or not to have a second child can be considered from two aspects: size and pattern. The original intention of having a second child in this life is neither to be afraid of the loneliness of the child, nor to have a sense of support for one's old age. The reasons are as follows: Modern society is no longer the farming era, nor the era when information and entertainment were underdeveloped 30 or 40 years ago, and the way of entertainment is very single. Babies in one-child families can get along and play with their parents like brothers and sisters. Parent-child relationship seems to be more harmonious than families with many children. On weekdays, children go to school with classmates, and on weekends, the family of three go out to play, watch movies and talk about current events. Children seem to know more. In addition, the financial situation of one-child families is usually ok, not to mention who they depend on when they are old, and no one can take care of them and go to nursing homes. However, I still support having a second child. There is a tradition in China that having many children is the blessing of a small family. The more people there are, the more popular the family is. I hope that the responsibility of a child's success will not fall on a child's shoulder. Having a second child reduces the risk of this family. It is often reported in the media that after the implementation of the one-child policy, some family life without children is very unfortunate. If you have at least two children, this risk will be reduced. Secondly, from a big perspective, the aging in China is getting more and more serious, and the population growth in the three northeastern provinces is serious. Having a second child has also contributed to the sustainable economic development of the country in the future; In ancient times, there was a benevolent policy that the only son did not join the army, that is, only one son in the family did not recruit, and providing for the elderly was the most important thing. Therefore, having a second child is also to add strength to future national defense. Finally, I think whether to have a second child or a third child, we should comprehensively consider our own situation, whether there is anyone to take care of the baby, and how the economic conditions are. Don't follow the trend!